Falling or Flying
by redunicorns01
Summary: Sequel to Are You Happy Now? Stepping up. It's a simple concept really. It basically means to rise above yourself. She's coming home for the first time in 7 years to the people that gave her one and not everyone's excited to see her.
1. This Time Around

So here's the sequal to _Are You Hppy Now?_ We're picking up seven years after high school and seeing where the lives of Kimberly, Tyler, Brooke, and everyone else are. I know it's been a while since _Are You Happy Now?_ so if you'd like, go back and read over just to remind your brain of what's happened.

I hope you enjoy!

"_When it comes to the future, there are three kinds of people: those who let it happen, those who make it happen, and those who wonder what happened."_ - John M. Richardson Jr.

**Chapter One: This Time Around**

_I see what I want and I've had a taste_

_I'm aware of the sacrifice its gonna take_

_^v^v^v^v_

When she was five years old, her mom would always tell her that happiness was the key to life. When she went to school, they asked what she wanted to be when she grew up. She wrote down_ 'happy'_. They told her she didn't understand the assignment and she told them they didn't understand life.

You ever heard the expression _time takes it all_? Well it does.

If you let it, it can take everything from you. Love, family, the need and want for something. And it takes the people that we are to stop and take it back. It's harder than it sounds. First we have to stop, and we have to know that we have to stop. Most people don't. Then you have to figure out exactly how you're going to get all back. People give up here because they can't figure it out.

And then you have to take it back.

But you see most people won't do this. Something has to happen in order for them to do this.

_Brooke let out a breath and tried to wipe away the tears. "You're one hell of a kid, you know that?"_

"_I'm not a kid anymore." She said with all seriousness, but hating it, not wanting it to be true._

"_You're my kid." Brooke cupped her hand behind her head and pulled her into a hug. She rubbed her hand along her hair. Kimberly hugged back, knowing this is how it's always supposed to be. "You're my kid." She repeated._

_Kimberly bowed her head into the crook of her neck thinking about all the ways her life was going to change. Everything was about to change. And even though she didn't want to admit it, she knew it. But there was always going to be that one thing. That one thing that's been absolute all along. It just took a long journey to realize it._

"_And you're my mom."_

Her name is Kimberly Baker and she's a little…lost. But she doesn't know it yet. Her work consumes her every thought. It's come to the point where her friends have step away in fear of being run over.

She's changed since her family has last seen her. She's more serious and not the girl they used to know. She's grown up into this person she never wanted to be and she doesn't even realize it yet.

She's an agent. A music agent to be exact. Her job is to go out and find bands and put them in venues to perform and studios to record. It's harder than it sounds. At least to the average person it is. She's been at this for the past year and she couldn't love it anymore.

But it's not like she was given the job. She had to work for it. She didn't ask for her aunt's help or her mom's name, though she did throw in that her father was a movie producer and that he was always looking for a good song for a great movie. But that was the only time she did. It got her the job and the rest was up to her.

She started off in the mailroom, like any good employee would, but eventually she became an assistant and then someone else's assistant and so on until she had her own assistant and an office all her own. She picked the bands to record (to an extent). Her boss trusted her judgment and most times sat back and watched how she worked with certain artist and when he needed to step in he would. But along the way Kimberly proved that she could do this job…and she could.

The perks of her job were what still gave her goosebumps. When she found a band and booked them for shows, she was that person that stood backstage and watched as artists did their work. Every week was a new show. Every week was a new adventure, a new story. But somewhere along the way the stories mixed together and too many shows became a nightly thing and sometimes she couldn't keep up.

She loved it.

It never got old. The music. Peyton once told her to never forget the feeling she gets when listening to a really great song. She told her to listen for the meaning, not the money, because this industry will take away the most important part of music. And she never forgot. Music isn't about money or fame. It's about life and love and art and everything you want it to be it is.

That's all it is.

Maybe she thought so strongly of that, that she kept working so everyone would know it. She wanted the world to know that music isn't just music. It's a lifestyle if you allow it. It heals, it breaks, and it loves. It does everything for you.

"Look I need them in the studio tomorrow morning and at the club on Friday, six sharp, ready to perform." Kimberly barked into the end of her phone as she paced back and forth in her office.

She's grown up over the years. She's taller somehow and her face has aged with experience. Her hair is darker and longer than she would like. She hasn't had a lot of time to get it cut. She's sweeter, but sterner than the high school version of herself. She's exactly who she used to be, but she's nothing like her.

"I don't care if they say they need a break. They have an obligation to this label and that obligation is to be musicians and record." She waited for the guy's response and almost couldn't stop herself from scoffing and completely calling the guy out on his bull. Over the years you learn to think for yourself and do things for yourself.

"Look I need you to cut through the red tape here and get them in the studio tomorrow." She said using a phrase she used to hear both Julian and Peyton use when dealing with annoying clients.

She sighed when the band's manager didn't agree with Kimberly's demands. "Look, Bobby, I love you and I love the band and we've known each other for awhile now. But I have a job to do and that is to make sure you guys look good. So just work with me here." She smiled when Bobby finally agreed. "Thanks Bob. I'll talk to you soon."

Another job well done.

And finally her day was over. She could go home and relax until tomorrow. She walked around to her desk and sat down to gather her things. Her desk was a disaster. Forgotten contracts put to the side and things she could have been doing instead of arguing with band managers all day. She could deal with this now and relax later, but she just wouldn't. The tiredness she has is taking over her and she really just wants to get home now.

So she grabs the few things she needs to take because she needs to do them before the morning and grabs her coat and purse before walking out of her office. Her assistant, Jess, starts walking towards her and Kimberly almost wants to turn around and run the other direction, but whatever Jess has is probably important and something she has to do.

"Jess, please tell me whatever you have can be done tomorrow." Kimberly begs while still walking in the direction of the door.

"Actually you have a few phone calls. One from your mother and a Mrs. Peyton Sawyer."

"Jess," Kimberly stops to look at the college student, "what did I tell you about personal calls?"

"I'm sorry, it's just…"

"Don't worry about it." She assures, smiling at the almost scared girl. "I'll call them later. Thanks Jess." Kimberly turns and without a second glance walks out onto the windy streets of Chicago and makes her way home.

She never planned on Chicago being in her future. When graduation rolled around she had to find a job and really any job would have done. In the beginning she assumed she would just go back to Tree Hill and work at Red Bedroom, but certain circumstances happened that kept her away. So she applied everywhere: L.A., New York, Seattle, Miami…Chicago. Some didn't think she was fit to work in the mailroom, some accepted her, but Chicago just stuck out. There wasn't anything really significant here. It was just a random place on the map.

But she couldn't have been happier once she got here. She found a small (very small) apartment a few minutes from her new job and started to really enjoy the new scenery. She loved how the music scene was different everywhere she went and she particularly loved it in Chicago.

Eventually she bought a better apartment, made friends, and thought as this place as her home. Though the place that shall not be named would always be her real home.

Her apartment wasn't that large; it just looked that way because it was mostly empty. She had furniture and things to fill up the empty spaces, but it was the lack of people that made it empty. There was only one. She'd come to enjoy it though and very rarely invited people back to her place. It was filled with personal things, pictures, letters, memories, and things she didn't want her friends, or anybody for that matter, to know of.

She walks in and is instantly hit with that sense of loneliness that she gets every time she comes home. She shakes it off and enters the kitchen to find something to eat because she hasn't eaten all day. After searching for awhile she settles on some leftovers she's not sure how old they are, but she doesn't care.

The first thing that's playing when she flips on the TV is an old classic movie that Brooke loves. And Kimberly can't stop that smile when she remembers the countless times the two of them made Julian watch this movie that he called 'horribly stupid'. Usually they'd told him to shut up and smack him in the chest while he laughed at how offended they would get.

She finishes her dinner and continues to watch the movie until it's over, then decides to find something else. She should probably do that work that has to be done by tomorrow, but she's a procrastinator and she works better when she's in a jam for some reason. So she puts it off.

The phone rings and she's not exactly rushing to answer it. In fact, she's kind of disappointed she's been interrupted. But she can't just leave it ringing.

"Hello?" She says into the receiver tiredly and ready for bed. It's not even ten yet and she's almost ready to pass out.

"Hey, Kimberly, it's me, Hannah."

"Hey, Hannah." Kimberly says a little shocked to be hearing from Hannah. They still talked, and were still friends, but somewhere along the way things between them (distance mostly) pulled them apart. Hannah pretty much called once a week and for birthdays and holidays. And Kimberly did the same. "What's up?"

"You don't remember, do you?" Hannah questions knowing that her friend has no idea what she's talking about. There was a pause between the two and Hannah really couldn't believe that Kimberly would forget this. "Katy's singing tonight." She helped.

"Oh my god. I totally forgot." She says her hand smacking against her forehead. "Is…has she…"

"No not yet. She's about to though. She's really nervous."

Katy found this talent for singing a few years back. Grace caught her in her bedroom when she thought no one was home singing out loud to an old song that she used to love. It was Kimberly that convinced her to join choir and sooner or later Katy found herself as one of the best singers in her school.

"She wanted you to call." Hannah breaks Kimberly's silent trance. She feels horrible, she really does, and she wishes she would have remembered. Kimberly knows Katy's probably a nervous wreck and probably needs her sister to tell her she's going to do great. But she's not there and she forgot to call, so she's pretty much useless now.

"Will you just…will you tell her good luck for me? And that I'm proud of her."

"Yeah, I'll tell her."

"Thanks Hannah." Kimberly says quietly.

They say their good-byes and hang up and Kimberly truly feels bad for what she did. She knew Katy didn't like her being in Chicago and her in North Carolina, but it's just how life worked out. It's been a little over a week since the last time they talked, a month before that. Their phone calls have shorten and Katy doesn't visit her anymore and neither does Kimberly. And Kimberly's starting to get the impression that Katy's starting to really hate her.

But there's really nothing she can do about it while here in Chicago.

She pushes any doubts to the back of her mind and flips the TV off to get ready for bed. It's an easy sleep that night, even after she disappoints her own sister.

^v^v^v^v^v

Her morning is a little…hectic.

For starters she woke up late. Her nice, quiet shower was shortened to a fast one and her breakfast was a granola bar. She was lucky her clothes matched. And still manages to get to work on time. After two years of doing this, she thinks she has it down packed.

She finally gets done with that work she was supposed to do the night before (barely) and starts on the things that need to be done by today. Her band is late and she's beginning to get stressed. She's avoiding calls and has already canceled two of her meetings for the day.

It's stressful, but she's never been one to crack under pressure (at least not anymore).

Her phone starts ringing and she dreads answering, so she doesn't. It stops and Kimberly smiles until it starts ringing again. She's busy and doesn't have time to deal with snobby assholes.

"Miss Baker, the band's here." Jess says entering her office.

"Thanks Jess." Kimberly smiles thinking it's about damn time they got here. She leaves the papers on her desk and goes to deal with her band up in the studio. "And call me Kimberly." She throws over her shoulder to Jess.

She loves her job. It's fun and exciting and it's a new story everyday. It changes on a day to day bases. But she hates the office work. The papers that need to be filled out, contracts that need to be signed, it's a lot to take in and she would much rather be out finding the bands than dealing with them. She's never complained about it though. She knew that she had to work for her position and she knew she had to work to keep her position and she's glad that she does because she loves every minute of it.

Except this part.

"Kimberly what the hell!" Angry musicians that need more attention than she can supply. It's frustrating and sometimes messy, but in the end it comes out okay.

"Hi Max." Kimberly says as sweetly as she can.

"I told you we don't want to play at that crap venue anymore." He says motioning to the other members of the band. They all have the same angry expression as Max does and Kimberly literally has to stop herself from laughing.

"I know." She says simply.

"Then why are you making us play there?"

Kimberly sighed, running her fingers through her long blonde hair, a smile tracing her lips. "Because this place has been good to you and the band. They've given you great promotion and keep asking you to come back. Now, Max, this is an indie label, which means you're not always going to be playing big ol' sold out stadiums. Now one day when a major label comes along, and I promise they will come because you guys are good enough to be on a major label, then you'll get the big shows and fame that comes along with it."

"It's not about the fame." He deadpans probably trying to convince himself that.

"Really, because you're kind of making it sound like that it is." She smirks. "Look, I know you want bigger audiences and better promotion, but this is all we can do for you and if you don't like it, you and the band can leave. But do you remember what I told you when we first signed you?"

He shook his head.

"I told you that if you give me a chance that I'll get you guys to the big time. Now have I not tried my hardest to do that?"

Max smiled knowing she was right. "I'm sorry, Kimberly. We'll play the show."

"That's what I thought."

The band chuckled and retreated back into the studio to get in a few good recordings. Instead of going back to her office, Kimberly stayed put on the outside looking in. She had to smile at the band and how far they've come.

When she found them they were just five guys with a few instruments. With her promise, Kimberly made them into what they are today. Musicians on the verge of becoming rockstars.

She couldn't think of a better life for herself. For the first time in a (very) long time she felt good, really good. Sure she had always dreamed to get married and have kids, but she figured that could always wait for later. Right now, she was just enjoying her job and her artist and her life itself. She felt like the pieces of her puzzle were coming together.

"Excuse me? Kimberly?"

Kimberly turned around to see none other than Jess in the doorway. She arched her brow waiting for what the girl had to say hoping it wasn't something about work.

"You have a few phone calls waiting for you."

"Can you take a message for me?" Kimberly asked turning back to watch the band.

"They say it's urgent."

"Alright." She huffed leaving the studio and heading back downstairs to her office.

She walked into her still messy office with papers strewed everywhere and the lights on her phone blinking uncontrollably. Jess stood in the doorway waiting for any further instructions. She didn't even bother to sit down, figuring this would be quick.

"Touch and Go Records. This is Kimberly." She said picking up the phone and putting it to her ear. The smile fell when she heard who it was on the other end. After he said doctor, she sort of blocked out his voice. She's never really had a problem with doctors, but she got a strange feeling when she heard the tone of his voice.

And when he gave the reason for his call she literally felt her heart drop. Her stomach knotted and she couldn't feel her legs anymore. The temperature had rose twenty degrees to her and her mind racked with questions she wasn't sure he could answer.

"Oh my god." She said after he described what had happened.

And just like that the pieces of her puzzle fell.


	2. A Lack of Armor

**Chapter Two: A Lack of Armor **

_And I tried to forget you but _

_The memories got stuck and now they're on display_

^v^v^v^

It was an aneurysm. It was quick and painless, and in the blink of an eye it happened. She came and went. The doctor's say there was nothing they could've done to save her. They say…well that's all Kimberly heard before the phone slipped through her fingers and she bolted out the door. Her mind moved and her legs seemed to follow. She can't remember when she went home and packed a bag or when she was nervously sitting on the plane. She remembers the time between running out of her office with Jess screaming her name and right now.

"Katy!" Kimberly yelled when she saw the teenager sitting by herself in the waiting room of the hospital. A woman around Kimberly's age who looked a lot like Hannah sat beside her with the same grief-stricken face her sister had.

"Katy." Kimberly stopped when her, now fifteen year old, little sister looked up to her. Her face wasn't red with tears, but she still looked miserable. It's been three years since they last saw each other, but when Kimberly saw her sister she couldn't help it, especially in this time, but hug her. Katy was almost as tall as she was now, her hair had grown out since last time, and she just…changed.

They pulled apart and neither knew what to say to the other. Three years was a lot of time apart and it could have been longer if not for the circumstances. "Katy." Kimberly repeated this time shaking her head. It was all she felt like she could say.

"I want to go home." She mumbled. She said it like a child, so innocent and helpless and Kimberly didn't know how to respond to that.

Hannah saw and decided it was best to intervene. "I'll take her. You should probably talk to the doctors anyway."

Katy went for the exit, emotion showing no sign on her. "Hey," Kimberly stopped her. She hugged her again for an unknown reason, just to be near her. Katy didn't (or couldn't) lift her arms. Like always, Kimberly was taller, but Katy had grown to be just a few inches shorter. "I'll see you at…" She stopped herself. Katy didn't have a home anymore. And from the look on her face, Katy knew exactly what Kimberly was going to say. "I'll see you later."

Hannah's hand went to Katy's back and with the simple touch she flinched. They left Kimberly at the hospital, not sure herself of what to do now.

"Excuse me?" Kimberly stopped a random doctor. "Are you Dr. Thomas?" She asked remembering the doctor she had spoken to on the phone.

"Yes." He nodded.

"I'm Kimberly Baker…Grace Jenkins' daughter."

His face didn't change. Besides, he deals with death everyday, he's used to this. But Kimberly still had a hard time. "I'm so sorry for your loss." He said trying to comfort her by placing his hand on her arm.

"What happened?"

"Well as you know, Grace had an aneurysm. It's basically a weak area in the wall of an artery that supplies blood to the brain. It just so happened to rupture and cause a stroke. We did everything we could before it happened, but…"

"Wait, what?" She stopped him. He gave a confused look and Kimberly thought she was losing her mind. "What do you mean 'before'?"

"You didn't know?" Kimberly shook her head. "A few weeks ago Grace came in saying she had some severe headaches and blurred vision. We ran some test and found it. She had known about it for at least a month." She felt her stomach drop and swore her heart skipped a beat or two. "I'm so sorry, Miss Baker. I, I thought you knew."

Her body was numb, she couldn't move, and staring at anything other than the linoleum floor seemed impossible. Her mom just died. Just died. Dead. Dead. She's dead. It seems so easy to think, but when it comes to saying it she can't utter the words.

^v^v^v^

She's driven these streets hundreds of times and yet it all feels so strange being here. Like she doesn't belong here anymore and it's been too long since she has.

But she's here for the worst of reasons and now she's wishing she never picked up the phone. She could still be in Chicago and living her life the way she's been.

She's finding it hard to believe it. Just a few hours ago, her mother was alive and well (well that's what Kimberly thought) and now she's gone. When she was younger she used to wish this upon her mother, as horrible as that sounds, but now that it's happened, after all the fences they've mended, all Kimberly wants is one more day with her.

But she's gone now. Just like this life she used to know.

It's all coming back to her. The nervous feeling she always got before driving up that driveway to see Katy came back to her. The familiar places where she would go to on her visits here. The picnic table her and Hannah used to sit at and talk till the early hours of the morning on a warm summer night. She remembers it. And she feels guilty for leaving it all behind.

The house was still the same. The white shutters looked freshly painted and the garden Kimberly never cared about looked ready to sprout. It was exactly how she remembered it. Then she noticed not one light was on, but everyone over at Hannah's was.

She locked up her rental car, not bothering to grab her one bag, and made her way over to her old friend's house.

"Hey." Hannah said opening the door before Kimberly even gets a chance to knock. "Katy didn't want to be over there." she says pointing over to her own house. "I brought her over here. She's asleep." Kimberly nodded, wondering how you fill an awkward silence after you've been gone for seven years. "How are you?"

"I feel like shit." She answered honestly.

"Same here." Hannah nodded with a small smile.

"It's just…I never expected this. I…it feels so unreal."

"I just wish there was something I could have done.

They were both lost and confused. They were just throwing out random sayings that you usually say when someone dies. There was nothing they could have done.

"Did you know?" Kimberly asks after a minute of silence sitting.

"No."

She sighed. "Why didn't she tell anybody? I mean…it wasn't fair for her to keep this from us, from Katy…I got to talk to her." She went for the door, but Hannah stopped her.

"Kimberly, she's already asleep. Let's just leave her. You'll see her tomorrow." Kimberly nodded, settling back onto the railing she had been sitting on. "You should probably get some sleep too. You've had a long day."

Hannah moved for the door, but Kimberly just stayed.

"I'm gonna…I'm gonna head over next door." She said making her way down the steps.

"Kimberly."

"I just…I'll see you tomorrow." She said, too tired to explain to Hannah why exactly she was going there. She didn't even know why.

"_This is a nice house you have." Kimberly said observing the sunlit living room with leather couches and plasma screen T.V. The kitchen was small but still big enough to fit several people in for meals. And the pictures along the wall showed a happy two person family through out certain periods of their lives. Grace had surely done well for herself._

"_Thank you." She replied setting her bags down by the stairs. Katy had long gone to her room, saying she needed to greet her dollies, leaving the grown-up and teenager to themselves._

"_I like your curtains." Kimberly complimented trying to start conversation._

"_All I've gotten is silence out of you for the past four hours, you wouldn't even talk to Katy when she asked a question, and the first I get out of you is "I like your curtain."?"_

"_Actually, I said you had a nice house first." Kimberly corrected with her smartass attitude._

"_That doesn't matter."_

"_Well, what do you want me to say?" She questioned in annoyance. "This is a nice house you have and I'll be going now. Fine. I'll go." She said walking to the door but was stopped when Grace blocked her way._

"_No, Kimberly, I want to know why you're here. Does Brooke really know you're here? Because I don't want to go to jail for kidnapping."_

"_Brooke knows I'm here." She assured._

"_OK, that's a start. Now do you mind telling me why you're here?"_

"_Do you not want me here? Because that's fine. Brooke doesn't want me, you don't me. I'll go find a park bench and sleep there. I'll make everyone happy and disappear." She spitted out. She hadn't told Grace about Brooke and didn't intend on it._

"_Kimberly, it's not that I don't want you to be here. It's just weird that you're here." She said with a sympathetic look Kimberly didn't catch because her mind was still trying to catch up to the fact that she really was here. "What happen with Brooke?"_

"_Nothing." She lied._

_Not buying her lie, Grace saw the pain in Kimberly's eyes and the hurt look she had. "She made you come here, didn't she?" She huffed. After Grace had told her how great she was to Kimberly and how happy she was, Brooke went off and did this. "Unbelievable."_

"_Listen, you don't know the situation. You don't know anything about me and Brooke."_

"_So you're defending her? After she told you to come and stay with me?"_ _Kimberly stayed silent. Yes, she was defending her but didn't want too. What Brooke did was wrong and they both knew it. But this was more Kimberly's fault than Brooke's even though Kimberly wouldn't let herself believe that._

"_Is it alight if I stay here or what?" She asked really needing a subject change._

"_Of course. Upstairs, first door on the right is your room."_

_Kimberly began to climb the stairs in search of her room with not so much as a 'thank you' leaving her lips. She was exhausted. From fighting with Brooke to crying until there was nothing left to cry about to a four hour car ride had worn her out. All she wanted was a bed to sleep in and she wanted it now. She didn't care that she didn't have a change a clothes to slip into or the fact that she was in desperate need of a hot shower or that she looked terrible from her puffy face to her bloodshot eyes. All she wanted was to go to sleep._

"_Kimberly," Grace stopped her. She froze in mid-step, not bothering to turn back. "No matter the situation between you and Brooke, I'm still really glad you're here." _

_It hit her like a ton of bricks. She was really here, with her mother, the woman that left her. She had told herself over and over again that if she ever came across her mother in the future that she would not hesitate to blow up right in her face. She wouldn't hesitate to tell her what she did led to a series of unfortunate events for Kimberly and that it was all her fault. But this was worse. She was living in the woman's house, with her daughter, who just so happened to be the sister she didn't know about until a few days ago. To Kimberly this felt like her own personal hell._

_That statement alone hurt more than any beating or name calling she had ever endured. __Kimberly glanced over her shoulder at the waiting woman. "You're the only one that feels that way."_

It looks the same as it did the last time she was here. There's a new table or a new plant here or there, but other than that she feels like Grace is going to walk out of that kitchen with a smile on her face.

But she never does.

She takes the stairs by twos and walks the simple hallway admiring the pictures along the wall. They've changed. They're more up-to-date. Ones with Kimberly in them. She sees Brooke in a few and her little sister, Alison, in some. She sees a couple of pictures that she doesn't want to remember, ones that hurt to see that smiling face and remembering how happy they used to be together. She shakes her head, ridding the thoughts of what used to be, and continues on.

Katy's room is different. It's always different when she comes to visit. She either has too much stuff in it or not enough and it's up to Kimberly (in Grace's words) to fix it. It used to be their bonding thing. She'd come down for a few days and the two of them would lock themselves in Katy's room with the music blaring while Kimberly found some way to make her bedroom 'cool'.

Eventually, though, it ended once the visits became shorter. She didn't realize how much she missed it until now.

Her phone's vibrating and she hesitates to answer it. She thinks that's how it'll be when she goes to answer a phone for now on.

"Hello?" She says once she sees Brooke's name flash across the screen.

"Hey." Brooke says happily into the phone. It's past ten and if Kimberly's correct, Brooke just put Ally down to bed and Julian's working on some script. "How are you? How's work?" It hit her now that the world didn't stop moving because of Grace. Brooke had no clue and it was Kimberly who had to tell her.

"Not good actually." She sighs heavily. "I'm not in Chicago, mom." She says remembering now that her 'real' mom is dead and her 'other' mom is in Tree Hill. She should feel lucky to have two, or had two.

"Then…"

"It's Grace." She stops her. "She uh…she, she…" She's stammering. She doesn't want to say it and she's praying that Allison wakes up with a nightmare to distract her. "She, she…she's gone, Brooke. She had a stroke."

Kimberly can hear the breath hitch in Brooke's throat. She can feel the shock throughout her body and can already hear the sad tone of her voice.

"Kimberly, I'm…" She trails remembering how much her daughter hates to hear 'I'm sorry' in these kinds of situations.

"Yeah I know." Kimberly says quietly walking into Grace's bedroom and staring at the little things along her dresser. "I got in a few hours ago and the funeral's Friday."

"We'll be there." Brooke says quickly.

"No…no. We're uh…we're flying to Mississippi so she can be buried next to Jacob."

"Kimberly…"

"I know you want to be there, Brooke, but Ally has school and you have work and I…I need to do this alone."

"Okay."

"I'm sorry, Brooke, but I…"

"Kimberly, I get it." She says. She does understand. Brooke knows if Kimberly needs help she'll ask. But in some situations she thinks she needs to do things alone. "How's Katy?"

"I don't know. She was asleep when I got back from the hospital." Kimberly says picking up an old picture of her and Katy when she was sixteen. She takes a seat on the bed and stares at the picture of happier times and she tries to pinpoint the exact moment when things got too hard.

"I don't know what to do, mom." Kimberly admits quietly.

"Yeah you do. You just don't know it."

"That makes no sense." She chuckles into the phone.

"It will. Everything's going to be OK, Kimberly."

"You've been saying that for years, mom." She says remembering all the times when Brooke would tell her that one statement. It was sort of their motto. Brooke would tell her that when she was down and it always gave Kimberly hope for light at the end of the tunnel. She used to believe it – over time, though, it faded.

"Just trust me."

"Alright." Kimberly says, too tired to argue.

"You should get some sleep. I'll let you go. I love you, Kimberly."

"I love you too, Brooke." They hang up, leaving Kimberly still staring at that picture of her and Katy. It's weird how much time has passed. It seemed like just yesterday her and Katy were just meeting. They were strangers that were sisters. Now…it was the exact same. She didn't know Katy anymore. Kimberly thought she did, but really she didn't.

Things have changed and not for the better.

She fell back on the bed that used to be her mother's, with that picture clutched to her chest. Her heart raced and her mind shut down. She was too tired to think about how wrong this was to sleep in this woman's bed. But it was an easy sleep.

And she hates herself for that.

^v^v^v^

"_Hannah, come on! We should have been on the road an hour ago!" Kimberly yelled from outside as she walked up the porch and into the house. _

_Hannah was in the kitchen enjoying a cup of coffee at the table with Grace. Her bags were by the door for their summer long roadtrip and if Hannah thought Kimberly was taking those out to the car then she had to be kidding herself._

"_I don't know who you think I am, but I'm definitely not carrying those bags out to the car for you." Kimberly said pointing over her shoulder to the bags. Hannah pouted and slowly got up to carry the bags. Kimberly smiled proudly before walking over to Grace and embracing her in a hug. "Hey, mom."_

"_Hey. You guys almost ready to go?"_

"_Almost" She nodded. "We just have to finish getting the car packed and say our goodbyes."_

_Grace smiled tucking a strand of hair behind her daughter's ear. "You know, I'm gonna miss you this summer, right?"_

"_Yeah, I know. Where's Katy?"_

"_She's upstairs." She nodded towards the staircase._

"_Okay. That's it, the car is packed, let's go." Hannah said barging in jingling the keys in the air. The mother and daughter laughed. "I'll go get Katy." _

_When Hannah left, Grace turned back to Kimberly and looked her straight in the eye. "You be careful, OK? You never know what kind of crazy people are out there." _

"_I will." Kimberly nodded. "We'll be back by the end of the summer."_

"_You better be." Grace said hugging her one last time. They broke apart when they heard footsteps descending down the stairs._

_Kimberly walked over to Katy while Hannah went to say her goodbyes to Grace. Kimberly bent down to Katy's level and before either said a word Katy hugged her._

"_I'll only be gone for two months, OK? And then we'll have a whole month to ourselves."_

"_Promise to send me stuff?" Katy asked with such innocence._

"_Of course." She said ruffling through her hair. "Now you be good for your mom. I love you, kid." She said hugging the tiny girl one last time._

"_I love you too, Kimberly."_

"Kimberly. Kimberly." She could feel someone shoving her, but the sleep was too much for her. Her name was being called louder and louder and the nudging against her shoulders became harder. Finally her eyes fluttered open.

Hannah stood at the side of the bed and watched as Kimberly rolled over and wiped the sleep from her eyes while trying to remember exactly where she was.

"What time is it?" Kimberly asks sitting up from the bed.

"About 10:30. Did you really sleep in here last night?"

Kimberly glances around the room and then down to the bed and she feels bad for letting herself sleep here of all places. "I guess I did." She says with her voice rusty. "Where's Katy?"

"Downstairs." Hannah says pointing behind.

Without a word, Kimberly hopped off the bed and down the stairs to find Katy. The feeling in the pit of her stomach came back and she found herself clutching the railing on her way downstairs.

She found Katy outside on the back porch just sitting there staring out into the yard she had grown up in these last few years. With a sigh, Kimberly opened the door and stepped outside.

"Hey." Katy looks over her shoulder up at her older sister, but didn't respond.

"What the hell is that?" Kimberly asks pointing to the cigarette in her little sister's hand.

"A cigarette." She says bitterly.

A small laugh leaves Kimberly. She can't believe her fifteen year old sister is smoking. This kid really has changed in the last few years. "Since when did you start smoking?" She asks taking an unwelcome seat next to her.

"Since a girl in my algebra class asked if I wanted a cigarette." Katy says not making eye contact with her.

Kimberly nods, understanding that she wants to be alone, but she's not leaving. Everyone left her when she needed someone; Kimberly's not going to do that to Katy.

"Fair enough." She says looking out to the yard. "You want to talk?"

"There's nothing to talk about."

"Katy, there's everything to talk about."

Katy scoffed, flicking her cigarette to the ground. "Well, then there's nothing I want to say to you." She says before getting up and heading back inside.

"Look, Katy." Kimberley stops her. "I know I haven't been around that much, but I'm here now."

"Would you be here if mom wasn't dead?" Katy asks in anger. It took Kimberly's breath away and she can't look at her own sister, because they both know the answer. "That's what I thought. Just don't bother, Kimberly. Go back to Chicago."

Kay turned to leave and this time Kimberly didn't stop her. She just stood there looking beaten down. Seeing that version of Katy reminded her so much of her old self. Lost and helpless, but trying not to show it.

"_That didn't go as well as you panned, did it?" _Kimberly turns around to find the voice that she's sure is just in her head. But there's no one there.

She turns back to the spot where Katy just was.

Maybe she could be Katy's Brooke.

^v^v^v^

"How'd it go?" Hannah asks when Kimberly walks back into the kitchen. She's fixing breakfast and Kimberly's not sure why. She's not hungry and she knows Katy's not. Maybe because Grace did it and they're used to it. Maybe because it's just something normal out of a day like this.

"Not good." She says deciding not to divulge in any details.

"Well, how are you doing today?" Hannah asks setting down a cup of coffee in front of her friend.

"Not good." She repeats. "How do you not want to burst out crying?"

"I did all my crying last night. It seems to be the only time when I think about how great Grace was." Hannah says earning a nod from Kimberly. "I'm just trying to keep a brave face for Katy."

"She seems to be taking it pretty hard." She says looking up to the ceiling where they both can hear the angry music from Katy's bedroom.

"Are you talking about that?" Hannah asks pointing to the ceiling. "She's been like that for months. I swear the only time she's different is when she's up on stage singing and when she found out about Grace of course. I've never seen her so blank in my life."

Kimberly sighs. "I don't know what to do, Hannah, with Katy, with the funeral or with anything. I feel helpless."

"We'll take care of Katy." She says reaching over and laying a hand on top of Kimberly's. "And before Grace died she planned out the entire funeral. Everything's paid for."

"Of course." Kimberly sighed. "So, Friday we'll be in Mississippi burying my mom. What happens after that?" She asks looking over to Hannah for any form of an answer.

"Things are going to get really interesting."

^v^v^v^

"_You'll get over it…It's the clichés that cause the trouble. To lose someone you love is to alter your life forever. You don't get over it because 'it' is the person you loved. The pain stops, there are new people, but the gap never closes. How could it? The particularness of someone who mattered enough to grieve over is not erased by anyone but death. This hole in my heart is in the shape of you and no one else can fit it. Why would I want them to?" _– Anonymous

* * *

Just so we're clear, give me two chapters of Kimberly/Katy time as they deal with the funeral and such and I promise we'll be introduced to the Tree Hill cast. It's just how I planned the story and I already have those chapters written out. So, I hope you enjoy and until next time...


	3. Keep On

I'm leaving Saturday and I'm not sure if I'll be able to update next week, but I'll try to get in another chapter some time this week.

_"If I had my life to live over, there would have been more "I love __you's" and more "I'm sorry's"…But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute… look at it and really see it… live it…and never give it back." - Erma Bombeck_

**Chapter Three: Keep On**

_When you can't understand, but you're starting to see, it'll work in the end  
You just got to believe_

It's not the same as it used to be. The little town she grew up in. Things are newer and brighter and everyone around her seems _happy_. She's convincing herself it's all in her head because she's going through this tragedy while the world continues turning. But really it's always looked like this to her.

While people enjoyed the life they lived, Kimberly lived the opposite. She's had seven homes here in this town. Her father took everything away from her here. Her mother hit an innocent child here.

It's where her brother lies, her best friend, and after today, her mother.

And she doesn't want the world to continue spinning while she goes through this. It's not fair that the people she passes by on the streets are happy and loving their lives while she's going through _this_. She wants to be them with not a care in the world. She wants to be in Chicago at work, loving her job, not burying her mother.

It's not fair. But she keeps moving.

She knows these streets like the back of her hand, even after ten years of being away from them. She's wander them looking for…everything. She never did find it. But today she's driving these streets for reasons she doesn't know if she'll be able to do. She's got to be strong, though, for Katy and for Hannah and maybe a little for herself.

Maybe a lot for herself.

Katy's been giving her the silent treatment since they left for the airport that morning. They know she doesn't want to go, none of them do, but it's something that has to be done. It's a final goodbye and personally, Kimberly thinks it's even bullshit. Saying goodbye means their really gone and maybe their not ready for her to be gone just yet. Hannah's been making herself busy to keep her mind away from certain things. And Kimberly knows it's killing her.

Katy's silent, Hannah's busy, and Kimberly's just trying not to say something stupid.

"You dressed?" Hannah asks poking her head through the door.

"Yeah." Kimberly says peeking over her shoulder as she finishes applying her makeup. She swivels in her seat and watches as Hannah strides over to the hotel bed and sits down. "You look good." She says motioning to her friend's black dress.

"You too." Hannah says quietly staring down at her fingers. It's catching up to her. Kimberly can see it. The notion that she's really gone. It's getting closer to hitting Hannah. Kimberly's accepted it, but the fact that she's gone, she hasn't accepted that.

"You OK?" Kimberly asks.

"Not really."

"Yeah, I know how you feel, but we'll be OK. We just got to get through today, right?" She wishes it was that easy. But it's going to be a lot of days their going to have to get through. And maybe they'll never be able accept the fact that she's gone. Most people can't.

"I hope so." Kimberly hears Hannah whispers.

"Is Katy ready?"

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about." Hannah says finally meeting her eyes. "She doesn't want to go."

"What?" Kimberly asks, crinkling her brow.

"She won't even open the door for me."

Kimberly's up on her feet and striding towards the door in one swift motion and it's only a few seconds before she's beating on her little sister's door.

"Katy, open the door!" She hears a _'No!'_ "Katy, I'm not playing! Open the door!" There's nothing this time and she's reminded of all the times Katy would do this when she was a kid and angry at something. But today's not the day to be acting childish and Kimberly doesn't have time for these games. Hannah's standing behind Kimberly and she's about ready to try again when Kimberly beats on the door again. When she gets nothing she figures she has to take a different route.

Kimberly has to take a deep breath before reverting to yelling again at the wooden door. "Katy…" She sighs, not able to think of how to get her sister to open the door. She receives sympathetic stares from the people passing by and that normally wouldn't bother her, but she's had control of her life for the last seven years and now she hates people to see that now she really doesn't.

"Just open the door…please." Her voice is desperate and she hates that she has to sound like this. She hears a click and there's a sigh of relief that leaves her before she pushes the door open.

Katy's sitting on the edge of the bed wearing plain jeans and a tee shirt, definitely not funeral attire. She's distracting herself with the remote in her hand as she ignores Kimberly. She takes the seat next to her little sister. She feels awkward and she's sure Katy feels it too, but isn't letting up. They sit in the quiet as Kimberly watches Katy flip the channels just for the sake of a distraction.

Kimberly looks over at her sister and really sees her for the first time. Her blonde hair is longer and thicker than it used to be. It falls in her face and she doesn't bother to push it away. Her blue eyes remind her of Grace, except they're darker and filled with something that's not grief; it's something she can't put her finger on. Maybe it's anger. Her long legs are crossed over the other and it really shows how much she's grown up.

She's fifteen and Kimberly feels like she knows nothing about her. She can't look into her eyes anymore and tell if she's happy. She can't bring back that little kid that loved her older sister. As much as she tries to bring her back, Kimberly knows she's gone forever. She's just like how Kimberly used to be.

"I'm not going." She states firmly, still not looking over at her sister. "And I don't want to talk about.

"OK." She nods. "But Katy, I just want you to think about later on. You're gonna regret not going."

Katy stares over at Kimberly, finally setting down the remote and pursing her lips. "My mom's dead now and she's going to be dead later on."

She can't take her eyes off this girl that's not her sister. Who is she? This girl that doesn't even seem to care that her mother is gone.

But Kimberly nods nevertheless and says OK, even when she knows it's not OK. She shouldn't be giving up this easily, she should be telling her to get dressed and be out in the car. Grace wouldn't let her do this.

"Well?" Hannah says once Kimberly's back out in the hallway.

"She's not going.'

"Kimberly…" Hannah groans.

"She doesn't want to go, Hannah, and frankly I don't blame her." She says maneuvering around her and walking down the hall down to the car. It's something she wishes she doesn't have to face, something she wishes she could just not do.

And she finds herself wishing she was sitting in a hotel room right now avoiding it all.

It was small.

Ten or twelve people maybe showed up. It really shouldn't have, but it surprised Kimberly to see these people that really loved Grace. In the back of Kimberly's mind, Grace was still that woman that left her at the age of ten. Over the years, that voice has been covered the best it could be with great memories that Grace helped create. She wonders if any of these people have that voice in their heads.

She was asked to give a eulogy beforehand, asking if she wanted to share a memory of her mother. She said no. It's not because she didn't have any good memories, she did. It's not because she didn't want to cry more than she probably would. But because she can't think of a good memory. They're there, she knows it. There are plenty of them. But none of them are something that she wants to share with people she hasn't seen since she was a little kid. It's like telling someone your favorite song. Once you do it, it's no longer your favorite song, but someone else's.

And she can't pick just one thing to remember her mother for.

The casket's lowered and everyone seems to gather in a circle around Kimberly to give they're condolences. She doesn't want them, but they seem to be the only way people can really express the way they feel. They ask about Katy and Kimberly doesn't have the heart to tell them she didn't want to come. She tells them that she's sick and is grieving in her own way. They seem to accept it and move on to the next set of questions.

But Kimberly can't take it and steps away so Hannah can take over. She walks along the little path along all the gravesites. She sees her older brother's grave with newly fresh flowers on his grave. Friends of the family must have put them there today. She doesn't stop to talk to him like she knows she should. She can't and can't remember the last time she really looked up and talked to her brother.

She can't remember when she did it for her best friend either.

Her grave is just along the way. Kimberly can see it from where she stands, but can't pick up her feet and go over there. She's only been to it once for her funeral, but she knows exactly which one it is. It's the one with no flowers and looks as if it's been there for fifty years instead of ten. No one's stopped by to see it, she knows that, she hates how she almost grew up with no one caring either.

There are too many people buried in this cemetery.

"Kim?" she peeks over her shoulder to see an awkward Hannah standing with her arms to her sides. "Can I talk to you?"

She turns around and takes the few steps over to her friend.

"I got a call this morning from Grace's lawyer." She pauses, not seeing a change in emotions on Kimberly. It amazes her how similarly Katy's become to her older sister. "We need to go in and discuss some things."

"What do you mean some things?"

"Who gets the house, certain possessions…Katy." There's a lump in her throat that she fights to overcome. Her mind's been in a tailspin these last few days; she never stopped to think about _after the funeral_. What happens to her? And Hannah? And Katy? It never crossed her mind.

"When and where?" Kimberly asks trying to fight back tears. She didn't cry during the ceremony, but the thought of giving up everything to take care of Katy has her on the verge of them. God, who's this person she's become?

"Noon, tomorrow when we get home."

She simply nods and turns away. To keep her eyes away from those two graves side by side and the one across the yard.

There's a sense of relief that washes over her when the plane touches back down in North Carolina. Kimberly's thinking that the hard part's over. Her mother's buried, gone, and now all that's left to do is to keep on living.

Sometimes, though, that can be the hardest part.

Trying to live life without that one person that seemed to always be there for you. It's not an easy thing to let go of, nor to just move on from. But she's trying. It's an everyday battle to stay strong. And she seems to be doing it for everyone, her sister and Hannah, but her insides are screaming at her to just cry. But she doesn't want to. She doesn't want people to know that she misses her mother. As crazy as that sounds.

She wants things back to normal. She wants to be back in Chicago, loving her job and her apartment and her friends. She doesn't want to be here, dealing with funerals and angry teenagers and…everything.

And as selfish as it sounds, she wants to go back to the life where she only had to worry about herself. Because, here she has to worry about everyone and she's never had to do that until now. And she doesn't like this responsibility.

Katy won't even look her way. Every time she turns around, Hannah's reveling in a new memory of Grace. She's getting phone calls from people she's never heard of that knew Grace and they're giving her their condolences. And she just wants everyone to stop.

She wants to crawl up in a little hole and be left alone.

But she can't do that today. Too many people are looking to her for whatever it is they need. But who's looking after her for whatever she needs?

The office is too big for the three people seated in it. Kimberly and Hannah sit on one side of the large table as Grace's lawyer and all his papers are on the other. He's looking over every last bit of information to see if he's missed anything and Kimberly wants him to just hurry up. All she wants to know is if she's going to be a guardian or not. She doesn't care about the house or the car or any of it.

She's about to say something when Hannah feels it and kicks her under the table. Kimberly scowls her way and Hannah gives off one of those 'mom stares' Brooke used to give her.

Finally, the man looked up to both Hannah and Kimberly. He started naming off possessions that went to who. It was the two of them that knew and loved Grace enough to actually receive anything.

Kimberly won the house and the cars which of course she would sell no matter what. She didn't want Grace's house. She loved it, yes, but living there when that one person that makes it home is still not right. Hannah received certain personal possessions of Grace's that were close to heart as did Kimberly and Katy. The money, which Grace had been saving for years, was given to Katy, for a college fund is what she assumed and they were both fine with that. Both girls wanted Katy to have enough money for college. Hannah didn't get much; she didn't ask for any of it, they just wanted to know who got the most important thing.

"Sir," Kimberly interrupted, "can we just skip the rest and get down to custody?"

"Of course." The lawyer nodded and looked back at his papers. "According to the will, custody of Katy Jenkins will go to a Miss Kimberly Baker."

The room fell silent. You could've heard a pen drop if there was one around. Kimberly felt her heart stop and body go numb. Somewhere deep down, she knew this would be the result, but she kind of hoped it wouldn't be.

"Excuse me that can't be right." Kimberly says leaning forward in her chair.

The man looks at the paper again. "Grace wrote this will a week before her death. It clearly states that if she dies you'd be Katy's guardian."

It doesn't matter how many times he says it, it still makes her get goosebumps. And she feels all these things she can't do anymore fly out the window, because now she has to take care of a teenager and it was never something on her list of things to do in life.

"But Hannah's a much better parent than I could ever be. Are you sure this isn't some kind of mistake?" She can't believe the words pouring out of her mouth. She's looking for any reason to get out of this.

"It clearly states that you are the guardian. Now if there's any problem with that, the two of you can settle this in civil court. If that's what you wish." He looks at Kimberly over his glasses. It's an escape. She's found a way out. She doesn't look over at Hannah to see her reaction to all of this. Kimberly knows Hannah would be better at this. Now here's her chance. But that question of taking that out is circling her mind.

"Miss Baker, is everything alright?"

She doesn't want to be a horrible person and say no, say that she doesn't want to do this. Deep down she doesn't feel that it is a mistake, she just feels like she can't do this. She doesn't want to do this. But she can't be that person. That person that always leaves and that person that says they don't care. She's had too many of those kinds of people in her life and she doesn't want Katy to have them in hers.

"Yeah." She nods. "Everything's fine."

In life, all we can do is keep on, move on, and let go. They're hard things to face, because letting go is letting go of something you used to love. Moving on is facing a new future. And keeping on is embracing that future without turning back and running away.

It seems as if it's all we can do to survive. That weakness we all have inside of us seems to take over and you feel as if you can't do anything. But the thing is, you can, you just got to find a way. Embracing new things and a new life isn't bad, in fact, sometimes it can be a good thing. You just have to find those good things and grab onto them.

It's finding a reason to hold on that's the hard part.

She's looking for a reason to hold on to this new future that's a head of her.

Knowing what she's going to do next would be a good start.


	4. Head Full Of Doubt

"_I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can something. And because I cannot do everything I will not refuse to do the something I can do." – _Helen Keller

**Chapter Four: Head Full of Doubt**

_There's a darkness upon me that's flooded in light  
In the fine print they tell me what's wrong and what's right  
And it comes in black and it comes in white  
And I'm frightened by those that don't see it_

^v^v^v^

She's a carbon copy of a younger Kimberly. She never thought she'd see the day when her little sister seemed to be worse off than herself. And she wants to blame Grace for it all. Because she promised she'd never leave Katy, she promised she wasn't that person anymore.

And, still, she left.

It's not the same as how she left Kimberly, its worse actually. Because now she can't come back six years later and say she's sorry. No matter how much Kimberly wishes she could.

And she remembers how she was the one that promised Katy she'd never leave. She remembers promising phone calls and summer vacations, presents every Christmas and for the past few years, Kimberly's let her down. A small part of her feels like the old Grace in that sense.

She wants to say it wasn't her fault. Work got in the way and life became too much to handle. But its other reasons that had her separating herself form Tree Hill and everything she left behind. And Katy just so happened to be one of those people she separated herself from. Not because Kimberly hated her or something, but because everything that had something to do with these people and this town was something Kimberly had to get away from.

Seeing Katy now, a cigarette in hand and that angry expression on her face, made Kimberly rethink her reason behind everything.

"You know, they say your face will get stuck if you keep the same expression on all the time." She tries for a joke, walking out onto the porch where Katy's sitting down on the bench.

"Funny." She hears Katy mumble under her breath.

"Look, Katy…"

"I don't want to talk about it." She cuts in before Kimberly can say anything. She already knows what her sister's going to say. Nothing Kimberly says is going to bring her mom back, so there's no reason to say it. She doesn't want to talk to anybody, she doesn't want to see anybody, she just wants to be alone. And Kimberly can understand that. She used to be the same way and maybe it's not the best way to handle something, but for a while it feels like it is.

"OK." Kimberly nods, giving up on this battle for what feels like the hundredth time. She knows trying to talk to Katy is like talking to a brick wall, she just hopes that she breaks that wall down sooner or later.

Kimberly turns back to go inside, to leave Katy alone like she wants, when she hears that small voice she thought left that body long ago. It almost sounds vulnerable and soft. But then she can hear that pinch of demand and that's how she knows its Katy speaking.

"I'm not going to live with you in Chicago."

Kimberly turns back to her younger sister and moves to sit down beside her on the bench. "How did you find out about that?" Kimberly asks seeing Katy take a puff from her cigarette.

"I heard you and Hannah talking." She says, not even looking over at her. "I'm not living with you in Chicago and I don't want to stay here."

"OK." Kimberly says before taking one last look at Katy and moving to get up. She doesn't even think about it. It's what Katy wants.

Kimberly walks back into the quiet house and she stop and takes it all. She's never heard it this quiet before. She knows Hannah is upstairs and Katy's just right outside, but it feels different. Like no one's here. Or no one important.

She looks around the living room. She never really lived in this house, a few months were her longest stay, but it still feels like home to her – or a home. She came here for summers and sometimes Christmas, some weekends she'd drive here to see Katy, and back then she never minded that long four hour drive if it meant she got to see both Grace and Katy.

And she doesn't know why. Why she loves her mother so much. After everything that happened to Kimberly, Grace was the one thing she forgave. And Grace was the one that made everything worse. But she went six years without knowing she had a sister, she went six years without seeing the woman she calls mom, and then when she shows up Kimberly's angry. Angry that she came back. But she had a right to be.

But throughout it all, Grace stayed strong. She introduced Katy and Kimberly, she tried to squeeze her way back into Kimberly's life, and she even helped Kimberly find a best friend. Grace had done a lot of bad things in her life, but it's those good things that Kimberly remembers the most.

She's grateful for that, because she doesn't think she can go the rest of her life hating Grace. She doesn't want to do that she realizes, not anymore.

And she doesn't want Katy to do that either.

"Hey." Hannah says walking to the end of the stairway where Kimberly's sitting. She takes the seat next to her and rests her hands on her knees. "You OK?"

"I don't know anymore." Kimberly says quietly.

"You had to have known that what happened this morning was going to happen, right? You and Katy used to be so close together, there was never a doubt in my mind that Grace wouldn't give custody to you."

"I knew it would happen. Do I sound like a horrible person if I say I wish it didn't?" Kimberly asks looking over to Hannah, kind of regretting an answer.

"No." Hannah shakes her head. "Kimberly, you're not the same person you used to be, none of us are, but growing up means having responsibilities. I know this was never part of the plan, but…this doesn't have to be a bad thing – taking Katy."

"I know." She whispers.

Hannah stares over at her and really sees her friend. How much she's changed over these last few years. She's more mature and hardworking. She's too serious for her own good and Hannah knows she's still trying to hold it all together.

"Kimberly…" Hannah trails, waiting until her friend meets her eyes. "If you want, I'll take Katy. She can live with me."

It's Kimberly who stares at her friend now. It's another out. Another way to go back to the way things were, before her mom died and she found out Katy smokes, before she gained custody of her sister, before it all. She can go back to all of that. All she has to do is say yes.

But saying yes and going back to Chicago and back to work isn't going to change anything. Her mom will still be dead. Her sister will still hate her. She'll still be disconnected from everyone and everything here.

"No." She says barely audible. "I have to do this, Hannah. Grace thinks I can, so I'm gonna at least try."

"OK." Hannah nods. "I guess that means you're moving back."

"Yeah," Kimberly nods, "but I'm not staying here. Katy says she doesn't want to stay here and I don't want to take her back to Chicago. That leaves one other place."

Hannah nods and tears her eyes away from Kimberly. "When are you leaving?"

"I'm gonna start packing tonight. I want to get out of here as soon as possible."

"It's gonna be weird not having you guys here." She says meeting Kimberly's eyes. "I'm gonna miss this place."

Kimberly looks out to the living room and can peak into the kitchen. She only knew of Grace and Katy living in this place for a few years, but Katy grew up here and Hannah practically grew up in this house. There are more memories in this house for the two of them than there is for Kimberly. But it's still going to be hard to give up this house. It's like giving up a piece of you. Or even a parent.

"Yeah, me too."

* * *

"Brooke, are you sure?" Kimberly asks over the phone. She has no other choice. She's taking Katy to Tree Hill. She doesn't want to be here and she doesn't want to be in Chicago.

Kimberly would take both of those over Tree Hill.

That's too many memories for Kimberly to even relive. Too many people to see. Too many problems to face. None of them is something Kimberly wants to do. But she's keeping strong for Katy. Because she has to, she's the older sister, it's her job.

"OK, we'll be there tomorrow. See you then." She says hanging up the phone and throwing it on the table beside her.

She feels emotionally beaten. Her mind hasn't been in this much of a tailspin since she was fifteen. Katy doesn't want anything to do with her. Her little sister is just a younger version of Kimberly. And it's killing her to see that. The last thing she wants is Katy to go through that.

These CD's are what are keeping her mind off things. She finds herself putting them in boxes and taking them out just for the hell of it. Because she doesn't want to pack up her second home. She doesn't want to say goodbye to it. There're too many memories and events that took place in this house. These CD's are hers that she forgot while staying. Some are Katy's and some are Grace's. That one in particular.

_Take your crap with you._ Is what Grace would always say when Kimberly would go back to Chicago or New York or…wherever the hell she was coming from. Kimberly knew she was joking – that her mom liked it when she 'accidentally' left things here – she remembers the smile she always wore when she said it. Grace was never your typical mom (obviously) but that didn't matter. She'd make jokes and poke fun, but in the end she was there. Always.

"_Eventually you'll have to take your crap somewhere."_ The voice feels so real and familiar. But it can't be familiar and it definitely can't be real. That voice is dead.

Kimberly turns around to see where the voice came from because it just feels too real for her. But there's no one there to connect the voice to and for a split second she thinks it's all in her head. And then she thinks it's not.

She goes back to the shelf full of music and she thinks to herself that she can't put it off any longer. She has to pack. They're leaving in the morning and anything left behind isn't an option. So she picks up one album at a time and gently places it in the box as if it would break if she handled it any differently.

She picks up a Mia Catolano album, one that's been on this shelf for years, and she smiles because she remembers all the days Katy would wake her up with this album playing in her stereo. She remembers the concert Kimberly took her to because back then she just wanted to be a good sister. And she remembers the smile Katy had when she really met Mia. It was unlike any other. That was the night Kimberly realized how much she loves this little girl and that nothing would ever come between them. And she wants to have that same feeling again.

That's how she spends the next hour, picking up random albums and looking through them, reliving a moment in her past life when she was listening to that album. It's not until she reaches for that one case does things change.

She reaches for it without looking and when she picks it up it's lighter than all the other albums. It's a clear case with nothing but a CD in it. Two pictures inside, one of a teenage Kimberly and one of Katy taken not too long ago. When Kimberly sees the two pictures and sees the comparison between her sister and her younger self she sees the only difference between the two is the blue eyes.

"What the hell." Kimberly mutters opening the case and realizing the CD is actually a DVD. There's no description, just five simple words. _For when the time passes_. It's definitely Grace's handwriting and there's no doubt in her mind about what's on this DVD.

She hears Katy's footsteps down the hall and Kimberly doesn't even think twice about what she's about to do.

"Katy." Katy stops in her tracks right as she's passing the door and it surprises Kim that she didn't just keep walking. Her steps are slow walking in the room as Kimberly fumbles with the DVD in hand.

"I found this." She says handing it to her little sister. Katy takes it and looks over it once before staring back up at Kimberly. "It's mom's. I think it's…"

"Throw it away." Katy cuts in, tossing the case back to Kimberly and turning to leave.

"Look, Katy…"

"Just throw it away. I don't want it." It's the last words Kimberly hears from Katy for the rest of the night. She waits for the teenager to slam her door before turning back to the shelf of albums. She still has that DVD in hands and for a second she really contemplates throwing it away. But she knows that she can't. One day Katy's going to want to see this and a small part of Kimberly wants to see it to.

So she sticks it in the boxes with all the others.


	5. Somewhere Only We Know

_"There is a tide in the affairs of men. Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune. But omitted, and the voyage of their life is bound in shallows and miseries. On such a full sea are we now afloat, and we must take the current when it serves - or lose the ventures before us." _–Julius Caesar

**Chapter Five: Somewhere Only We Know**

_Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?  
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on_

"You hungry?" Kimberly asks, speaking the first words of the trip so far. It only took them two hours before anyone spoke a word. "We can stop and get something before we get to Tree Hill."

"I'm not hungry." She hears Katy mumble, sliding down further in her seat.

"OK." Kimberly nods. "By the time we get to Tree Hill it'll be dinner time anyway. I'm sure Brooke will have something." She smiles, trying to get a rise out of Katy. When the teenager didn't even look her way, Kimberly couldn't help but grip the steering wheel tighter.

It's a four drive and only two of it has gone by. It's been filled with nothing but silence except for the faint voice of the radio. Katy's blocked out the world with her iPod and Kimberly's still trying to figure out where to start in this whole messed up situation.

She looks over and sees her sister let out a long, bored sigh before trying to scoot even further down in the seat. She's waiting for her to fall to the floor and she doesn't necessarily like the feet on her dashboard.

"OK." Kimberly sighs and reaches over to pull the headphones out of Katy's ears. "We got to talk." She says before Katy can even protest. Katy sits up in the seat, letting out a now angry sigh and crossing her arms over her chest. "Look, Katy, I know what you're going through and I know it's a lot to take in. But the way you're acting," She trails shaking her head, "the depressed and moody teenager, it's not gonna get you anywhere. It's not going to do you or anyone any good. It's OK to feel sad, Katy."

"Whatever." She mumbles.

"Hey," Kimberly says harshly, surprising even her sister. Kimberly looks over at her sister. "Don't block me out. I can help you through this. Remember, my mom died too."

That gives her a real reaction. The scoff to leave Katy's mouth certainly wasn't what she was expecting. "No." Katy shakes her head. "She didn't. Your mom's Brooke Davis, remember?"

"Katy…"

"She's the one you visit every Christmas. She's the one you call up when something's bad or to check up on your little sister." She grits through her teeth. Kimberly doesn't correct her about coming every Christmas or calling too often, now's not really the time for that. Kimberly can do nothing but sit there and listen to what Katy really thinks of Brooke and Ally and her. She feels like she can do nothing. "My mom is not your mom."

"You know what I mean, Katy. Grace gave me life. She gave me a sister."

"And yet you still call her Grace." Katy threw back. Kimberly sighs and opens her mouth to say something, but quickly closes it when she realizes she doesn't know what to say. Katy sees she's trapped her sister and she can't help but chuckle.

Kimberly ignores her and continues staring at the road in front of her. She hates herself for counting down the hours until this car ride is done. She hates that it's almost unbearable to be in the car with her sister. She hates that their relationship has come to this.

"I know this is messed up." Kimberly says almost an hour after they last spoke a word. Katy barely looks over at her. "I know that I haven't been around much and I know I've been a horrible sister, but…but I'm here now."

"So?" Katy interrupts. "You're right, you haven't been around. There hasn't been a phone call everyday like you promised and you didn't come home for my birthday like you said. You realize this is the first time I've seen you in a year, right?"

"I know and I'm sorry, Katy."

"Quit lying to me!" She shouts. "You're not sorry. You'd much rather be in Chicago with your perfect job and perfect life than be here right now."

"But I am here, Katy." Kimberly interrupts. "OK? I had a responsibility and I'm here…for good. I'm not going anywhere."

"Would you be here if mom hadn't had died?" Katy asks, knowing the answer. She sees Kimberly bow her head, without even thinking about it. They both know the answer. "That's what I thought." She nods. "I didn't ask you to come here. I didn't ask you to take care of me – I don't need you! But since you're not leaving, I guess all I can do is tell you to leave me alone. I'm going to continue living my life, before you came back."

They don't speak another word after that. Two hours to go. Kimberly spends it thinking about how horrible she's been acting to her own family. Things have certainly changed since she graduated high school. She can't even pinpoint where it all started to change.

But she knows that it has and things are just going to keep on changing. She knows coming back to Tree Hill means facing people of her past and dealing with problems she's still trying to run away from.

She knows that Katy's right.

There's no comfort that washes over her when she sees that Tree Hill sign. It only makes her remember the very first day she saw it. Back when she was a runaway. She kind of feels like that now.

The old town hasn't changed a bit. Small towns tend to stay the same over time. But it all feels new to Kimberly, seeing those old buildings she grew up in. TRIC and Brooke's store, Karen's café and the old record shop that closed down a few years back. She remembers it all, it just feels too far away for her to grasp.

They drive the back roads and along the shore line until Kimberly finds the house she hasn't seen in years. Her own house. Brooke bought it about a year after Ally was born. She said she needed a bigger house for their growing family. Kimberly and Julian knew she just wanted a new house.

It's still the same, another thing that hasn't changed in this town. She can see Brooke in the window as she maneuvers around all the furniture and she's almost scared to get out of the car. She wants to back out of the driveway and just get a hotel for the night, but it's already dark out and she's tired and Brooke's expecting her, so she can't just leave.

Katy's the first to get out of the car, not wanting to wait for Kimberly to suck up her pride. Kimberly soon follows. The door slams hard and she can see Brooke peek out the window to see what the noise was.

"Hey," Kimberly stops Katy from taking another step, "promise me you'll be on your best behavior." She says, because she's more than sure Katy's still pissed and right now it's something Kimberly just doesn't want to deal with.

"Whatever." Kimberly's about to say something when a screamed version of her name is said and her head whips back to see Ally running out the door and into her older sister's arms.

"Hey, kiddo!" Kimberly greets, picking the little girl up in the air.

"I missed you." Is the first thing she says.

"Yeah? I missed you too."

"Momma says you're back for good. Is it true?" She asks with wide eyes. Kimberly loves this little girl. How could you not? At seven she looks just like her mom with hazel eyes and her brown hair with just a hint of blonde streaks in it. She has her father's smile, but you can clearly see her mother's dimples through and through.

"You better believe it." She smiles, not bothering to acknowledge the eye roll she sees Katy give. "Where's mom?"

"Inside."

"Well, let's go." She says setting the girl back down on the ground and following her as she runs back inside. Katy is behind them, deciding to take the slower route. Brooke greets her eldest daughter at the door and instantly the two hug. It's been a while.

"You look good." Brooke says, taking a once over of Kimberly. She doesn't mean it as just physical appearance and Kimberly knows that. She knows this is hard on Kimberly. "How was the drive?"

"Long." She chuckles, not mentioning the encounter.

Brooke nods and looks behind her to see Katy awkwardly standing there. "Katy." Brooke smiles and moves around to Kimberly to give her a hug. "It's good to see you. How are you?" Katy used to come visit when she was little, sometimes for the summer, sometimes just for a few days. It was really the only time she went without Grace. In that time, Brooke kind of took over the motherly roll. But as the years ragged on, Kimberly quit coming back and so did Katy. It's been more than a few years since they've last seen each other.

"I'm fine." She nods, giving the fakest smile everyone (with the exception of Ally) knows it's fake.

"Good." Brooke nods. "You guys hungry? Ally and I were just gonna order takeout."

"We're starving." Kimberly chuckles. "I vote chinese." Brooke nods and walks back to the kitchen to find the menus. Katy takes a seat on the couch while Ally goes to find something on TV to watch and Kimberly just stands there, watching both of her sisters.

This scene feels all too familiar to her.

Dinner's tense. At least Kimberly can feel it, and maybe Brooke.

Katy doesn't speak. Ally's in her own little world. And Brooke's trying to make things as normal as possible. But normalcy is going to take a while. It's been so long since she last felt normal that when it comes back she might not know what it is.

Normalcy. It's such a strange word. Sometimes, Kimberly thinks, it doesn't even exist. Who's to say what normal is? Maybe, this is normal. Maybe this is the life Kimberly's been reduced to because of all the tragedies that are happening lately. As she looks back on those deaths and terrible things, she thinks this is pretty good.

If this is normal, maybe it's better than the other stuff. But how long can this normalcy last?

"Come on, Kimberly!" Ally yells behind her as the little girl sprints down the beach. Kimberly can only chuckle and continue with her slow pace walking. She left Katy and Brooke back at the house, wanting to be alone with her other little sister.

Ally runs back over to Kimberly once she sees she's not going to make an effort to run around. Kimberly watches as her little sister runs around in circles and laughs at nothing in particular. She loves how this little girl is so carefree and how she doesn't understand this world yet. She hopes she never does.

She chuckles when Ally trips over her feet, but quickly gets back up, not fazing her at all.

"What?" Ally asks when she sees Kimberly laughing.

"Nothing." She shakes her head. "I just missed you, that's all."

"Momma missed you too."

"Yeah?" She asks, kinking her brow. "I missed her a lot too. I missed a lot about this place." She says, happy that her sister's too young to really understand the meaning behind that line.

"Well, now you don't have to, because you're here forever." Ally smile proudly. Forever. There's another strange word. Just the thought of it makes Kimberly's stomach drop.

"Hey, Ally, where's dad?" Kimberly quickly changes the subject, knowing the little kid wouldn't notice what she's doing.

"He's making some movie." She says, not too happy about it.

"You OK?" Kimberly asks placing her hand on Ally's shoulder and stopping to face her little sister. Kimberly bends down to meet her at eye level and she can just tell by the sadness in her sister's eyes that something's wrong. "What's wrong, Ally?"

"Momma and daddy have been fighting a lot." She says quietly.

"About what?" Ally shrugs her shoulder and keeps her head bowed down, afraid that there might be tears soon. "About money? Are they fighting about money?" She asks knowing that's the usual reason why parents fight. But that couldn't be it. Brooke and Julian have more money than they know what to do with.

"No." She shakes her head.

"Well, how long has this been going on?"

"I don't know." She whispers. It was the answer Kimberly was expecting. Kids aren't the best people to go to for information.

"Well, I'm here now. And things are gonna be good. I promise." She smiles bringing her little sister in to a hug and then picking her up in to her arms.

"I love you, Kimberly." She hears in her ear. Kimberly only nods and says it back to her before carrying her back home. She takes her inside and tucks her into her bed before Brooke comes in and finishes the job.

The whole time Kimberly wants to know what the hell is going on.

Brooke walks out of Ally's bedroom after watching her fall asleep and finishing the story she was reading. She closes the door quietly and begins to make her way downstairs where she could hear Kimberly messing with something. Her eye catches the light that shines through the bottom of the door.

She has nothing to lose, right?

She knocks softly before opening the door and revealing herself to the younger girl she used to tuck in during summer nights.

"Hey." Brooke greets, not expecting one back. "I just wanted to see how you were doing."

"I'm fine." Katy says using her earlier response. Kimberly told her to be on her best behavior and she's not really sure why she's listening to her sister, but Brooke's never done anything to her. She has no reason to be bitter towards her.

"Good." Brooke nods. "Do you need anything? Extra blanket, maybe?"

"No, I'm fine." Katy assures.

"OK. If you need _any_thing, I'm right down the hall and Kimberly's next door." She says making sure she got the extra emphasis on the word anything. "So, I'll leave you be. Goodnight."

She shuts the door quietly and lets out a breath she didn't know she was holding. Running her fingers through her hair, she makes her way downstairs to see Kimberly sitting on the couch with nothing to do. Brooke takes a seat beside her and makes sure to get a good look at her.

"What?" Kimberly asks when she catches Brooke staring.

"You've changed, that's all."

She scoffs. "No, I haven't."

"I don't mean physically." Brooke says, knowing Kimberly will get it. But she doesn't push it any further and Kimberly doesn't offer up much more on that. She wants to mention Julian, she wants to know what's going on, but it's late and she's tired and Brooke's probably tired and it might not be the best time. Besides, if Brooke wanted her to know then she would've told her.

"How are you doing?" Brooke asks. "Since the funeral and everything."

"I feel like I haven't even had time to process it, you know? Every morning I feel like I'm gonna wake up in Chicago." She sighs. "It all feels like a dream."

"And Katy?"

"I don't know." She shakes her head. "I get that we all deal with death in our own way, but the way she's doing it, Brooke, it's not healthy. She's shutting everyone out and she locks herself in her room and she doesn't speak to anyone. It's not right."

Kimberly looks over and sees the smirk Brooke's wearing and it's an expression Kimberly's seen often. She knows something or at least she believes she knows something. "What?"

"Remind you of someone?" She kinks her brow and Kimberly knows exactly what she's saying.

"I know, I know." She sighs. "She's exactly like me when I was her age. And that's the problem."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know how to deal with that, Brooke." She says turning in her seat. "She's either ignoring me or fighting with me and I don't know what to do. I'm not a parent. A few days ago I was living my own life where my own responsibility was me."

"Kimberly…" Brooke quietly says, stopping her daughter's little rant. Her hand lands on Kimberly's knee hoping it brings some comfort. "When I took you in I was exactly like that. I had never raised a teenager before, but I told myself that I was going to be there for you because no one else in your life was. And eventually you broke out of that shell of yours."

Kimberly nodded. "But what do I do until then?"

"Give her time. That's what I did for you. I waited until you believed you could trust me. Eventually, Katy will see that in you."

"Thanks, mom." Kimberly whispers sliding over to Brooke and laying her head in her lap. Hearing Brooke talk about how Kimberly used to be feels like she's talking about a completely different person. She remembers being that way and acting that way, but it's been so long and she's changed so much that that person she used to be is like a stranger. It's just another thing that's different.

"So are you really back for good?" Brooke questions minutes later.

"I guess so." She says, not too happy about it. "I hope you don't mind, but Katy and I might stay here for a few days. Just until we find an apartment or something."

"I don't mind." Brooke says, moving the loose hairs from Kimberly's face. "But wouldn't it be easier to just take the old house." Kimberly sits up in her seat and gives Brooke a quizzical look.

"What do you mean? I thought you sold it."

"I'm not going to sell that house. It's where we all grew up." Brooke stands up from the couch and walks back to her room, leaving Kimberly sitting on the couch. She comes back a few seconds later with a set of keys in her hand and she takes a seat next to Kimberly. "Here." She says handing over the keys.

"Brooke, I can't take these."

"And why not?"

She sighs. "Because I'm an adult."

"Yeah, so am I and if I want to give you a house, then I'm going to. And remember, I'm also your mother so I'm not taking no for an answer."

Kimberly chuckles and reluctantly takes the keys. Maybe having the old house can bring up some old magic. It is where Kimberly spoke her first words after Ashley died. It's where she found a family. Maybe that's where her and Katy can start repairing their's.

"Thanks, mom."

It looks the same.

Everything in this town looks the same.

It's comforting to know this, but when you've been living with different for the past seven years, not having any change can be hard. It's less excitement; the same people over and over again, the same buildings. But…that's never been Tree Hill. There has always been different people in this small town. There are always new places to discover. And there's always been some form of excitement.

So, staring at the old house she spent her high school years in, she thinks leaving behind the busy, different lifestyle of Chicago will be OK. She's realized that as long as Katy's OK, then maybe she will be too.

The living room is the same with some new furniture. The rooms are all in the same place as they were when she was last here. The view from the balcony is still pretty killer.

"You can have my old bedroom." Kimberly says as Katy looks around the house she used to come and visit during the summer. "You remember which one it is, right?"

Katy picks up her bag and nods her head before walking back to Kimberly's old bedroom, now Katy's bedroom. She slams the door, leaving Kimberly alone.

"I guess this is home."


	6. The Man Who Can't Be Moved

Hi! I'm so sorry I've been gone for so long. It's all this traveling I've been doing and not having time to actually sit down nd write something. I wish I could come back with a better chapter but for right now this is all I have.

...

"_Oh, my friend, it's not what they take away from you that counts. It's what you do with what you have left."_ –Hubert Humphrey

**Chapter Six: The Man Who Can't Be Moved**

_People talk about the guy that's waiting on a girl  
There are no holes in his shoes but a big hole in his world_

…

She remembers a lot about this old school.

Sleeping in English class and listening to Nine Black Alps during study hall. The horrible food and the old gym where that banner has hung for a few years now. She's heard a lot of stories about this place and has made a few for herself. But none that she's willing to tell lately.

Some of the teachers have changed and the walls have been repainted again. There's a different smell to it when she walks through the school she used to be a student at. She peeks into some of the classrooms and remembers being those kids. The kids that were too excited to see 3:00 roll around and were able to be free for the rest of the day. Some kids that come ready to learn and some that are there just there for a few extra hours of sleep. She remembers being exactly like that. And it feels like centuries ago when she actually was that.

She tightens her grip on Ally's hand and looks out the corner of her eye to see Katy still walking beside her. She's not entirely sure how she got wrapped into taking both Ally and Katy to school, she doesn't mind, she just can't remember how Brooke convinced her to do it. They reach the old office that looks like they've had the same secretary for a hundred years and Haley's standing outside her office waiting for them. She can't hold her excitement when she sees the woman who helped mold her life and the first thing she does is let go of Ally's hand and hug the woman.

"Haley, it's so good to see you." Kimberly says, unwrapping her arms from around the woman.

"Good to see you too. You've certainly grown up since you left this place."

"Aunt Haley!"

"Hey, Ally." Haley says getting down on one knee to hug the little girl. The woman surly doesn't care what her coworkers think of her. Haley's always been the kind of person to get down on a dirty floor just to hug a kid. "Haven't seen you in a while. I know that Jamie's missed playing around with you."

"I know!" The little girl giggles. "Momma's been keeping me very busy." She says causing everyone in the room to chuckle.

"Yeah, well tell her to cut it out." Haley smiles running her fingers through the little girl's hair. She stands back up on two feet and straightens her dress before she even notices Katy. "Hello, Katy. It's good to see you." Katy just gives her a curt nod.

Haley looks back to Kimberly and Kimberly can already tell what she's thinking and knows exactly what she wants to say. Kimberly just nods and shrugs a shoulder.

"I'll make sure she gets to all her classes. You don't have to worry about a thing."

"Thanks, Haley." Kimberly says giving the woman one last hug before taking Ally's hand. "You be good to day." Kimberly says to Katy once they're almost out in the hallway. She knows she should say _'have fun'_ or _'make new friends'_ or even _'learn something'_ but she knows Katy won't. She knows she doesn't want to.

She hears Haley yell something to her when she and Ally walk down the hall together. Something along the line as _'Don't go and pull a Brooke Davis on me!' _She can't help but chuckle and remember her very first day at this school when Brooke constantly called Haley worring about Kimberly. She has a feeling Katy can hold her own here, so those phone calls won't be necessary.

Kimberly gives a wave to the teenage girl and a small smile before walking out the door and leaving the girl alone for her to face her first day of Tree Hill High.

It reminds her so much of a time not too long ago.

…

Some days, she regrets ever leaving this old town.

She's missed so much in these past seven years. The trees are still the same shade of green and the sky's still the same blue. The appearance of the town is the same; it's just the people in it that have changed drastically.

Like Ally, for example. The last time Kimberly really took a good look at the small child she had just been born, as sad as that sounds. Every other time is like looking at pictures. She grows a few inches taller and her smile gets wider and some teeth fall out for the tooth fairy. She learns new things and laughs differently every time Kim sees her. Kimberly never noticed that she had her own views of the world or the fact that her parent's were fighting is really getting to her. She doesn't remember the day her and Sawyer became best friends. She just knows that she wasn't around for any of that.

Those are the days she regrets ever leaving. The days where she stops all of her working and thinks about Brooke and Ally and everyone in this old town. She grew up believing that Tree Hill was her home, that it's where she'll always belong.

She doesn't really feel that way now. She feels like more of an outsider and she can't really blame the feeling when she remembers that it's been seven years since she's actually been _home_.

She's gone almost her entire life not having that homey feeling. Until she got to Tree Hill. Brooke welcomed her, gave her a home, and gave her a family. And after leaving it all, she doesn't feel like she has any of that anymore. Though, Brooke assures her that she's there and is willing to do anything. And Ally's doing a good job of helping her remember where she's from too.

"And mommy takes me to the café every Saturday." Ally says pointing to the old Karen's café. It hasn't changed a bit. In the window she can see Karen behind the counter writing down an order. She's sure Karen's heard by now that she's back. She's sure everyone has. Maybe she'll stop by there after she drops Ally off.

Kimberly chuckles at Ally's happiness. From what she's heard no one's changed a bit. Brooke still hates to cook. Lucas found some inspiration for a new book and Peyton just discovered a new artist. Nathan's still a bit sports-minded and Haley's being superwoman with Jamie and double jobs.

She listens to Ally point out all the places she hasn't seen in years and she feels refreshed somehow when Ally describes them in great detail like she's never seen them before. Yeah, things sure haven't changed. They reach the school and Ally's already itching to get rid of Kimberly, but she holds her back just to tease a little.

"Kiss goodbye?" Kimberly smirks bending down on one knee. Ally huffs and glances over her shoulder to Sawyer who's waiting for her by the swings. Kimberly doesn't expect her to run over and say hi. They haven't seen each other since Sawyer was two.

Ally rolls her eyes and quickly pecks Kimberly's cheek before running off and throwing a _'bye' _over her shoulder. Kimberly gets back up and stands there for a few seconds and watches the two little girls swing. She just can't get over how much they've grown up. But then again they've all grown up. So has she.

When she turns around he's the last person she expects to see. But he's there and she recognizes him instantly. His raven hair and blue eyes is something she hasn't forgotten about. Even after all these years and she can still point him out in a crowd. And if she's speaking honestly, she forgot all about him when she came back to Tree Hill. She forgot he even lived here. Or, she hoped he didn't live here anymore.

But he's Tyler. And she knows he loves this town almost as much as she used to.

She can't help but watch as he interacts with other parents and his smile seems to grow when he's in the middle of a story. Not even he's changed a bit. But there's a split second when she thinks that maybe one of these kids running around is his.

She doesn't want to stay to find out, but her feet won't move and a small (or big) part of her wants to just hear his voice again. Because in the past that's all she ever needed. But that's the past and she doesn't need him anymore. She wants to prove that to herself, but then he spots her and she knows there's no way she's leaving now.

His smile drops when his eyes land on her and immediately he excuses himself from the group. His steps are short, thinking that maybe she's not real and just a mirage. He knew it wasn't. He's not sure if that's a good or bad thing.

"Hi." She spoke first. He's no more than two feet away from her, but still he can hear that tiny little voice of hers.

"Hi." He says back. "What are you doing here?"

"I had to take Ally to school." She says, knowing that's not what he meant.

"No," He shakes his head, "I mean, what are you doing back in Tree Hill?"

She knows she shouldn't tell him. He doesn't deserve to know. He hasn't been there for her these past few years. He doesn't need to know. It doesn't matter. But she wants to tell him. This guy that walked out of her life when she felt like she didn't have one. The last time she saw him was in New York, in her apartment, she told him to leave and he did. And she hated him for listening to her. That's been almost five years. But he's still that same guy she fell in love with when she was sixteen. He's still that guy she ran to when she needed him. She thinks.

"Grace died." She says quietly. She bows her head, but when she peeks back up she sees that he's just as shocked as she was when she first found out. She doesn't know how to take that. She remembers how Tyler was so nice to Grace, even if Kimberly was mad at her. He never did have a bad thing to say about the woman, though there were plenty to say. She knew Grace loved Tyler and she remembers how her mother used to say that the two teenagers would get married one day. That it was destined to happen.

"I'm sorry." He muffles out. "When did it happen?"

"About a week ago. It was an aneurysm."

"Oh, God, Kimberly, I'm sorry." He says, thinking that maybe he should've been there. "How's Katy doing?"

"She's fine." She nods, knowing he won't believe that lie. "She will be fine." There's a silence between them. He knows he should go. He has things to do and so does she, but he doesn't want to and judging by the look on her face she doesn't want to either. "So, which one's yours?" She asks nodding her head over to all the kids running around.

"Oh, no." He shakes his hands. "I'm not a parent. I, I work here. I'm a teacher."

"Oh. I didn't know." She says. There's something she didn't expect. The boy who spent his school years sleeping in class becoming a teacher? It's definitely something Kimberly never imagined for Tyler. "Good for you, Tyler."

"Thank you." He nods. "So…I guess you're back for good then." He says.

"Yeah." She nods. "Brooke gave me the old house. I think it will be good for me and Katy to get away from all that."

"Well, that's good I guess." He nods, trying not to let that smile escape. He turns to glance over his shoulder and checks his watch. "I got to go." He says quietly.

"Me too." She gives him a small smile, the first he's seen from her in five years and he has to admit its more beautiful now than before. "Bye." She turns her back to him and starts her way down the sidewalk, all without waiting for him to say it back.

He can't help but smile. She's still the same old Kimberly.

...

She hates this school. Everything in it, everyone in it. She can't help but just look at some random person and want to yell. She sees all these happy teenagers with their friends and boyfriends and girlfriends and then there's her, alone. It's not that she hates to be alone. She just hates being alone in the midst of everyone else and their happiness.

She can't remember when she became this person. This person that seemed to hate everyone and everything. She doesn't remember becoming the person that just doesn't care anymore. She thinks it all started with a stupid fight she had with her mom a few months back. It was immature of her to act the way she did and maybe her mother's explanation was suitable for the occasion, but at the time Katy didn't think so. She wanted to be selfish and she was. She just doesn't remember becoming that type of person.

She does remember, though, hating those types of people. The people that seem to hate the world and everything in it. Kimberly used to tell her that those are not the type of people she needs to be around because they'll bring her down and that that's a long way to fall. She also said that what's worse than being with those people is becoming them.

But she never asked for this. She didn't pray to God to take her mother away or to have a criminal for a father, a dead brother and an absent sister. She never asked for it. She didn't ask for her hatred for school or lack of friends. None of it was something she ever imagined for herself. Most of those things though are things that she can fix. But she can't, because she doesn't know how, or doesn't want to.

Her day's been terrible. Something she completely expected. Haley's been tied up so the job of helping Katy find her classes was taken over by Jamie.

When she first saw him again she noticed how he looked nothing like he used. Granted, they were nine. But at sixteen, he's taller than she is (which isn't saying much), his shaggy hair is a darker blonde than what it was before, and those blue eyes seem to be just a bit bluer. He has a smirk, one that could be cocky if he wanted it to be, but it isn't, it's actually kind of nice. She can remember that the last time she saw him he had a basketball trapped to his hip and this time's no different.

But she doesn't bother to let him in. She doesn't want to let anyone in. Even if it is this boy she used to know back when she was a little kid and still loved fairytales and ponies. She's not that girl anymore and by the looks of it, he's not the boy he used to be either.

Still, she spends most of the day by herself, ignoring Jamie, and completely tuning herself out from the outside world. But he won't give up. He's outside every one of her classes, he meets her in the library, and when she does ditch him she sees him at the end of the hall talking to some of his friends. He's popular, she's noticed, but he's everywhere.

"Katy!" She hears her name being called and she realizes that no one's chased her this much in her entire life. "Katy!" He yells again and this time she can hear his footsteps getting closer and closer to her.

"Hey, wait up!" Jamie says, finally catching up to her and walking beside her as she walks through the quad during their lunch period. "Hey."

She peeks from the corner of her eyes. "Hey." She says, not so pleasing.

He walks with her for a while, not saying anything. He's not sure why he's trying so hard with her. Maybe because his mom asked him to be nice to her. Maybe because he hasn't seen her in a while and remembers when they used to be really good friends. He's not really sure which one it is.

"Well, what class do you have next?"

"Biology." She says keeping her eyes forward.

"Me too." His smile is wide when he hears her say that one word. At least she'll know one person in her class. "I can be your lab partner if you want and it'd probably be best if you copy my notes. Mr. Barnes' tests are ridiculously tough."

"Whatever." She says walking faster. He tries to catch up to her before he has to break out into a sprint and grabs her arm and pulls her to a closed off corner of the school.

"Hey," he says, just staring at her. She looks down at his hand that still has her arm in a tight grip. He looks down too and sighs before he finally lets it go. "Sorry."

He wants to say more. But maybe there's nothing else to say. He's still thinking of something when he watches her walk away.

...

Her work has been something that's comforted her over these last few months. That and Ally. Her little girl is growing up too fast. She loves that kid almost more than anything in this world. Every time she looks at her she swears she can see herself staring back at her, and there are some times when she sees Julian in there too.

It's hard being away from him so much. He's always working on some movie and she's balancing a company and being a mom. She loves Julian, she does, she just _misses_ him too much.

So she works and takes care of Ally and now she's trying to help Kimberly with her tragedy. She just wishes someone was there to help her sometimes. Mostly, she ignores it and tries to help other people because that's the Brooke Davis way. She's always helping and never receiving it. She keeps up her strong and fearless exterior to hide the broken interior. People have no idea. And she kind of likes it that way.

She wants to be seen as strong and somewhat independent. As a child, she only knew how to rely on herself, but being an adult, it seems as if everyone wants her to breakdown. She wants to be vulnerable. Everyone says that they can see through it all, that there's a problem, but they also know that she's not budging.

Her work is her main priority at the moment. Trying to get the fall line out is a lot for her to handle already and right now nothing else matters, at this moment it has to take a backburner to her other drama. She'll have time to worry about Ally and Kimberly when she gets home.

She doesn't necessarily like it when she hears the bell above her door ring. She just knows it's not customer.

"Brooke!" She knows the voice. She also knows that she's only called Brooke when her daughter's mad at her. But she seems really pissed here. A small part of her just wants to ignore the voice and hide out in the back, but she knows that her daughter needs her right now and she will eventually find her.

"Back here!" A few seconds later and Kimberly's walking in with an angry expression and a body full of pint up emotions.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Kimberly asks as calmly as she can. Brooke turns in her seat; her legs crossed like the arms around her chest, and gives her the traditional Brooke Davis kink of the brow. "That Tyler was here!" She yells.

Brooke scoffs and turns to pick up her things to move them into the front of the store. Kimberly follows in suit waiting for her answer. Brooke looks at her and the smile on her doesn't exactly please her daughter.

"It's not exactly breaking news, Kimberly. He's lived here all his life."

"I get that, but why didn't you tell me he was the elementary school teacher, Ally's teacher." She asks firmly placing her hands on the counter and resting all her weight on them.

Brooke shrugged a shoulder and continues to flip through the pages of her book. "It just wasn't a big deal to me. He's been there since she started school and we've all just been used to it."

"But why didn't anybody tell _me_?" she asks, pointing a finger to her chest.

"If my memory serves correct, you've been gone for a while now and we didn't exactly get many phone calls from you." Brooke snaps glancing up from her book just to give that brow. Kimberly can't help but feel bad. It doesn't really hit her until now exactly how long she's been gone and how much she's missed.

"I'm sorry, OK. It's just, its weird being back here and everything's so different."

"Nothing's changed but you, Kimberly." Brooke says finally closing her book and directly looking at her daughter. She sees her daughter and all the age and experience she's had over these last seven years. She doesn't look very happy here and that's all Brooke ever wanted for her. Her high school graduation, she was overflowing with happiness. When she witnessed her graduate college some of it was drained from her and even though Brooke had a good idea on why that was, Kimberly wasn't giving out any information.

And she wonders when Kimberly became her and Katy became Kimberly.

"Kimberly, what happened between you and Tyler in New York?" Brooke asks, not fully thinking of her reaction. She's never asked the question, knowing how hurt someone gets when that question is asked. She's kept her mouth shut for so long, always wanting to know, but giving Kimberly her privacy.

Kimberly looks up at her mom, wondering what in the world possessed her to ask her that question. "I mean, you never did explain what really caused you two to breakup."

"_You have to quit making promises that you can't keep, Tyler."_

"_But I can, I can keep them. I still want to move in with you, Kimberly. I want to go to NYU with you and start a family."__He says through glassy eyes. She wants to sit down or crawl in bed like she was before he showed up, but his eyes are pleading with her that have her heart breaking. _

"_No." She says overcoming the lump in her throat. "We can't, you can't, do any of that."_

"_And why not?"_

"_Because there's someone else." _

_His heart breaks, literally breaks, he can hear it through his chest shattering and he almost feels like leaving just to go to the hospital. But he's frozen to the floor with his eyes glued to her and the words that linger in the air. There's someone else, someone other than him, and before that thought has never even crossed his mind. Now it's a reality and he knows that this is it. _

"_What?" He says, though he heard it loud and clear. "How, how could you do that?"_

"_You weren't here, Tyler, and I needed someone." She cries out._

"_Needed someone? I was here, Kimberly! Maybe not physically, but I called you everyday and I was the one who stayed up with you all night on the phone listening to you cry yourself to sleep. I was here, Kimberly, you can't deny that!" He says through gritted teeth and punching his chest over and over again. He doesn't care if it leaves a bruise or not, he just needs to get his point across. _

"_Maybe I needed more than that."_

"_More than what? Love?" He asks, not waiting for an answer. "Because I love you, Kimberly. Or at least I love the old Kimberly, not this one. I don't even know who you are anymore."_

"_Tyler," She lets out a long sigh. "I'm really sorry. I didn't want it to be like this."_

"_And I didn't want any of this to happen at all." _

"It was just distance, you know." She says, shrugging off the old, forgotten memory.

"Yeah." Brooke nods, letting the conversation go. "I guess it happens to all of us." She says knowing that her words are wrong. Lucas and Peyton survived it. Haley and Nathan experience it on a daily bases and are more in love than when they were back in high school. People can get through the distance, or at least the strong ones can.

"Hey, I need to ask you something." Brooke says leaning forward on the counter. "Are you and Katy doing OK?"

"She's still mad as ever." Kimberly says bowing her head and slumping her shoulders. "This whole wait it out thing isn't really helping. She hates me."

"Maybe not." Brooke smirks. "You remember the ring you used to wear, the one you gave to Katy." Kimberly nods. "She's wearing it."

"What?"

"Left hand, middle finger and if I'm right then she hasn't taken it off since you gave it to her." Brooke sighs, but looks back up to Kimberly and smiles. She's wearing the ring. The ring that meant so much to Kimberly as a child. The ring she gave to Katy so she could always remember her. She's wearing it and maybe it just proves that Katy doesn't hate her as much as she thought.

"Thanks, Brooke."

"No problem. I'll see you at Haley's tonight?"

"We'll be there. I'll see you later…mom." Brooke rolls her eyes and watches as her daughter walks out the door and down the street.

...

The clouds got dark and everyone in the small town seemed to go home for the night. Kimberly and Katy drove the quiet streets towards Nathan and Haley's house. Since she'd been gone the professional basketball player had bought a new house a bit farther out of town so that his family could have a bit more privacy. Kimberly didn't mind the extra drive. She just wishes Katy would talk to her. She wants to know about her first day at school, but Katy isn't giving up any information and it's almost killing Kimberly. So they drive in silence, something they've done too much of.

"Listen," Kimberly breaks the silence once they turn onto the correct street. "Do me a favor and be on your best behavior. These are our friends."

"They're your friends." Katy's quick to shoot back.

"You know that's not true." She says taking a glance over at her. "Those people love you, Katy, they have since you were a little girl."

"Yeah, well, I'm not a little girl." Katy says shooting her eyes at Kimberly. Kimberly doesn't think she can look over at her. "Don't' worry I'll be on my best behavior." She says sarcastically.

They pull up to the curb and Katy's quick to jump out and make her way to the door. Kimberly follows close behind. Haley answers the door before either has a chance to knock and again the two older women hug.

Haley shows them inside and leads them outside where everyone else is. This scene is all too familiar to her. It reminds her of the night they all had a great big dinner and Kimberly openly spoke her first words in three years.

Kimberly takes the drink Haley offers her before she goes to hug everyone she hasn't seen in so long. Lucas tells her that she looks beautiful and that it's great to see her. Peyton goes on to tell her how proud of her she is in her work. Sawyer is kind of shy at first, but eventually come around when Kimberly manages to get her to laugh. Jamie gives her hug and says that he's misses her. Nathan tries to be cool and only get away with a pat on the back. Kimberly's not having any of it.

During their little reunion, she sees Katy sneaking off down to the water and she thinks that might be best. She knows Katy doesn't want to be here, but she didn't want to leave her home alone. Katy needs to be around the people that can help her. She just needs to let these people help her.

Nathan finishes the burgers and everybody digs in. Kimberly and Brooke go inside to help get drinks and Brooke makes a comment about Katy not hanging around.

"I'm just giving her space." Kimberly says, because that's what Brooke told her to do. Katy will come around. Brooke just gives a smile and nods before going back outside. Haley soon comes inside for something and she about scares Kimberly out of her shoes when she walks into the kitchen out of nowhere.

"Sorry." Haley chuckles. Kimberly laughs too and reaches for a cup to get something to drink. "Having fun?"

"Yeah." She nods. "It's a beautiful house, Haley."

"Thank you." She says looking up to Kimberly before going back to fixing something for outside.

"Would I sound totally overprotective if I asked how Katy did today?" Kimberly asks, trying not to sound like that kind of person that has to know what's going on in their family's lives.

"Maybe." Haley nods with a small smile on her face. "But Brooke did the same thing with you." She says. She's not sure why, but Kimberly likes it when she's being compared to Brooke. It makes her feel like a better person, even if she's not being one. "But to be honest with you, I'm not entirely sure how her day went. I was super busy, so I asked Jamie to show her around."

"And?"

"And he said that she ignored him the whole day." She says, knowing it's not the answer Kimberly wants. "Its death, Kimberly, we all deal with it differently. This is Katy's way."

"I know." She nods. "I just want her to let someone in."

"She will eventually. Trust me."

...

"Jamie."

The teenage boy turns his head quickly, seeing Kimberly motioning him over. He drops the basketball in his hand and excusing himself from the game he was playing. "What's up?" He says when he runs over to her.

"I heard things didn't go too well with Katy today."

"Yeah." Jamie nods. "She kind of threw a hissy fit and ran off."

"Can you do me a favor and keep an eye on her at school and, you know, be nice to her? She really needs someone and she's made it pretty clear that that someone's not me." She says with pleading eyes.

"I don't know, Kimberly. After today, I don't think she likes me very much either."

"You guys used to be best friends. Can you try, for me?"

"Sure." He nods, enduring the squeal of excitement from Kimberly. There's a pause when she's done and he's wondering if he should leave, but she motions to down by the water and he can see Katy sitting on a bench staring out onto the river.

"Go." Kimberly says pushing him down the hill. Jamie chuckles and goes to grab himself a plate of food before actually going down the hill to face Katy's wrath.

"Hey." He says to her silent form. She doesn't look up at him, doesn't even acknowledge him. "You mind if I sit down?"

"Yes." He takes a seat anyway and stares out to where she is. She makes sure to scoot away from him a few inches.

"I brought you something to eat." He says holding out the burger and chips he brought for her. She doesn't take it and mumbles something like _'Not hungry'. _He takes the chips on the plate and starts eating them one by one. "You want to talk?" He asks, setting the plate down on the ground once all the chips are gone.

"What do you think?" She says facing him.

"You don't have to act like this. You know that, right?" She looks over at him and gives him a look of disbelief. "You don't have to shut us out, Katy. You can talk to us; everyone here has experienced death in their own way. My mom and dad, Uncle Lucas and Aunt Peyton. Even Kimberly and Brooke have."

"Have you?" She asks. It surprises him, really, when he hears the innocence in her voice.

"Yeah." He nods. "When I was a kid, my friend Quinton died and my grandpa died."

"It's different." She shakes her head.

"How?"

"It's your grandpa and your friend. It's not your mom or dad. It doesn't hurt as much."

"It's still death, though, and it still hurts. But if you want to know about true pain, ask Lucas. When he was eighteen, the man that he considered a father, my great Uncle Keith, died. He was shot by my grandfather, my dad and Lucas' dad, Keith's brother. Keith was a great man, or so I heard. I never got the chance to meet him, but I hear how brave he was and the great things he brought to the lives of the people he touched." He says staring out at the sea now; trying to think of other things to say about the man he's never met. "He brought Lily into this world. You remember Lily, right?" He asks seeing a nod from her.

"You want to talk about death? Go talk to Lucas. I'm sure he can help you out. Until then I'll try to."

She watches from afar as Katy and Jamie walk up the hill together. Katy' doesn't say much and neither does Jaime. She doesn't know if that's a good or bad thing, but it's a start.

She feels an arm wrap around her and she looks up to see Nathan standing before her, a beer in his hand and grin on his face. Kimberly relaxes into his embrace and wraps her own arm around his waist.

"She's grown up." He states, both staring over at Katy where she's seated at a table with just Jamie. She's picking at a burger and the two teenagers are just sitting there, with no words being said. "You know who she reminds me of."

"Yeah, I know. That's what everyone else is saying."

Nathan chuckles as he relives a memory. "I remember when Haley first found out about you. She came running home and she was so worried. I remembered I calmed her down, told her to go the Rivercourt and bring you back here. You remember that?"

"Of course. It seems so long ago"

"It was." He nods, taking a sip from his beer. "I hope you know what you're getting yourself into here." He says looking down and meeting her eyes. "She's gonna be a handful. You know those silent types. They're dangerous." He says making her chuckle. "But once you get to know them they're pretty special."

"Thanks, Nate."

He nods and pulls her closer. "Prediction." He says out of nowhere, motioning over to Katy and Jamie. "Those two are going to get together."

"What?" She chuckles nudging his ribs. "What makes you think that?"

"Look at my boy." He says and Kimberly looks over to see Jamie staring at Katy without her even noticing. "He's already in love with her."

"No." She shakes her head.

"Yes." He smiles. "It's normal for Scott boys to fall in love at first sight. Just look at me and Haley. And Lucas and Peyton. Those girls never stood a chance."

"You're crazy."

"Fine, don't believe me, but you'll see. They're going to fall in love with each other."

...

All this talk about love has her standing on his doorstep in the middle of night.

She left Katy at Brooke's, promising to be back to get her later. She knows Katy will be asleep and that she won't wake her up. She also knows that Brooke will bitch her out for just leaving the way she did, but she couldn't help it. Thanks to Nathan and his stupid predictions, she's standing here. She doesn't even know if he lives here anymore.

OK, maybe she heard Brooke and Haley talking about Tyler and they let it slip that he's still living in this old house. She loves this house. She remembers Saturday afternoons in this house where all they did was watch bad movies together. She remembers staying the night when his parents were away and the tree in the backyard where they spent hours sitting under during the summer.

She just can't believe he's still living here. She can't believe he hasn't changed that much about himself. She can't believe she's standing on his doorstep.

She doesn't want to talk, but she wants to talk to him so bad. She thinks it might be best if they talk things out now. Maybe they could go as far as be friends again. She's not asking to get back together, though, she wouldn't turn him away, but she has a feeling he won't be wanting that.

But she has to find out.

So, she knocks and she curses herself when it's not loud enough because now she has to do it again. She knocks again and this time she hears footsteps coming down the stairs. The porch light comes on and the door flies open. It's a woman. A brown haired woman wearing a robe answers the door with a tired smile and Kimberly feels really stupid for knocking.

"Can I help you?"

"Wrong address. Sorry." She says before turning back around and walking down the pathway. She hears the door click after she turns onto the sidewalk. She can't believe a woman answered the door, in a robe, with her tired smile. She feels so stupid.

Stupid because she actually thought Tyler was still single.


	7. Here Comes a Regular

I know I haven't updated in a long time, but it's all this summer. It's getting to me and I'm too busy out with my friends to actually sit down and write. Plus I've actually been working on something outside of fanfiction. But I have recently sat down and written a few chapters, so maybe I can get a few more chapter out soon.

...

**Chapter Seven: Here Comes a Regular**

_And even if you're in the arms of someone's baby now  
I drink a great big whiskey to you anyway  
And everybody wants to be someone's here  
Someone's gonna show up never fear_

Friedrich von Schiller once said, "Disappointments are to the soul what thunderstorms are to the air." The act or fact of disappointing. Where you let someone down. The state or feeling of being disappointed. Getting your heart broken over and over again. A person or thing that disappoints. Having someone break their promises to you.

It happens in so many ways. The disappointment, the feeling it brings, the aftermath of it all. Kind of like a thunderstorm.

We start out with puffy clouds of summer skies. It forms with humid air and is pushed to its limit with force. The air will rise through the atmosphere, expanding and cooling, to help create a liquid. And soon it's raining and all you can do is stand in the rain and take it all. It stops and you don't feel anything anymore and then you see lightning and you just know that you're in trouble.

Because that's the disappointment part. You think it's over and you think now's the time that things will get better and the sun will come out, but they don't. They just don't, because that one lightning strike had to come and ruin it all. The heat rises and the air becomes thicker to breath, and there we are, standing in the rain, taking it all once again as we reach our breaking point.

She feels empty and tired and like there's a huge weight on her shoulders that's just bringing her down. She wants to scream and cry and isolate herself in her room, but she can't. She's not sixteen anymore where that type of behavior was understandable. She's twenty-five. She has to handle her drama like an adult now.

So, she hides it. She wakes in the morning and puts on her clothes before dropping Katy off at school. She doesn't meet his eye when Ally runs off to be with Sawyer and she continues on her way. She doesn't think about him or what happened last night. She doesn't ask questions or let her fear of the answer overcome her. She just moves, putting one foot in front of the other, and she doesn't stop until she's where she needs to be.

It just so happens she needs to at Red Bedroom Records.

The place still looks the same. Classic red brick make up the walls as does the classic rock albums hanging from them. The simple desk far off in the corner and the recording studio right next to it. She loves this place. She has no idea why, but she thinks it might be because music is made here. Kind of like magic.

And she feels like a kid again walking into the studio to see Peyton at her desk writing away on some random paper. She doesn't know why she's here. She just is under Brooke's orders.

Peyton looks up from her papers and smiles, setting her pen down. "Hey you."

"Hey." Kimberly says taking a seat in the old red leather chair in front of the desk. "Why'd you call me here?"

"How long did you work at Touch and Go Records?" Peyton asks leaning forward on the desk with her elbows.

"About three years. Why?" Kimberly asks, not having a clue on where this conversation is going. She looks at Peyton and sees that mischievous smile she gets sometimes.

"And what did you in those three years?"

"I started off like any other person would. In the mailroom." She shrugs, remembering all those horrible days she had to work for snotty people. "And then I worked my way up to actually finding bands." She says. "Peyton, I don't understand why you're asking me all of this."

Peyton stands from her seat and walks around her desk. She smoothes out her skirt before taking a seat in the chair beside Kimberly. Her elbows lay on top of her tan legs as her hands support her head. "I want to offer you a job." Peyton says simply, letting Kimberly soak that all in.

Kimberly's shocked to say the least, though maybe she shouldn't be. She never really thought about what she would do for a job once she got to Tree Hill. Her main focus this whole time has been Katy. She knew she didn't want to give up on the music industry, so maybe this job offer shouldn't be a surprise.

"Now you won't be out finding bands for me. It will be more like an assistant job, but not really." Peyton scrunches her brows. "Does that make sense?"

"Not at all." Kimberly shakes her head.

"You'll be working more with the artist we have. Helping me plan shows, you know, that kind of stuff." She explains. "So, what do you say?"

And then she remembers. She sees Peyton kink her brow and she thinks of Brooke. And how it was Brooke who told her to be here at this time and there's no sign of her mother in sight. And now she just knows that Brooke set this up. This isn't a job offer, it's pity, because Kimberly doesn't have a job and her mom's dead and now she has the responsibility of a fifteen year old. Sure she needs a job, but not if it's like this.

"I'm sorry." Kimberly shakes her head. "I can't."

"Excuse me?" Peyton asks, trying a calm tone.

"I'm really sorry about this, but I know Brooke put you up to this. It has her name written all over it and I can't accept it. I'm sorry." Kimberly stands from her chair and grabs her purse before heading for the door. Peyton calls out to her and stops her in her tracks.

"What ever you're thinking right now is wrong. Brooke might have asked me to help you out, but I'm giving you this job because you're qualified for it." Peyton says firmly. "Now if you don't want the job you call me, but if you do then be here Monday ready to work."

Kimberly only swallows the lump in her throat and nods. She knows she needs the job. She knows she wants it. She also knows she can't take it like this. Not if she didn't get it herself. And it sure didn't feel like she got it herself.

Two days in a row she's been here. Both for the same reason. To yell at Brooke.

She stomps into the store as her heels click against the hard floor. Brooke barely has time to look up before Kimberly's at the counter. Her face is mean and contorted. Her eyes are fiery and her knuckles turn white from clutching the counter.

"We need to talk." She says before anything. Brooke's still in shock that all she can do is nod. Kimberly points to the couch in the middle of the store and Brooke doesn't hesitate to set down her things and skitter over there. She knows Kimberly's mad. She just doesn't know why.

"I know what you did, Brooke." Kimberly states pacing back and forth in front of the couch. "The whole job thing with Peyton, it has you written all over it. And you can't do this." She says turning to her mother and holding up her hand.

"Do what?"

"Do this. Get into my life and try to…"

"Help you?"

"Yes!" She says, finding the right word. "I don't, I don't want your help, mom. I'm an adult and I can find my own job without your help. I know you're only trying to help me and Katy out, but Katy is my responsibility and I need to do this alone."

Brooke looks to the woman in front of her and is at a loss for words. This isn't Kimberly. Not the Kimberly Baker she knows. "I thought I would never see this day." Brooke smirks, standing form the couch and walking over to her daughter. "The day that you, my daughter, didn't come to me for help. You used to all the time."

"Well, like I said I've grown up."

"No," Brooke says, shaking her head, "You've just changed." Brooke places her hand upon Kimberly's shoulder and it's one of those mother/daughter moments they used to have all the time. One they haven't had in a long time. "You love music, Kimberly, there aren't very many record labels around Tree Hill. Take the job."

It's pride that she can feel slide down her throat. It doesn't taste good at all and it almost hurts to bear. She knows come Monday she'll be walking into Red Bedroom.

Kimberly nods her head and mutters an apology before coming up with an excuse to leave. She grabs her things and heads for the door.

"And Kimberly." Brooke stops her. She's back at the counter, continuing her work, when Kimberly turns to look at her, "I saw Katy walk by about an hour ago." She smirks. "You might want to go check on that."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"She's your responsibility, remember?"

Keith Scott.

He was said to be a great man. A father to some, a hero to others. He died with no loved ones around him, no one except his own brother who pulled the trigger. He left behind a beautiful fiancé, a nephew that was his son, and a daughter who he never got the chance to meet. There were others that he was taken away from, but those were the main three.

People loved Keith Scott. He fixed their cars with a smile and raised a boy that wasn't his when his brother wouldn't. He gave advice and lived life. He found love, though maybe a little too late, but the months Keith Scott and Karen Roe spent together were magical.

And then, on a tragic day, Keith Scott went into Tree Hill High and never walked out again. People say he was a great man. All Katy sees is a tombstone. Nothing but rock with letters inscribed in them.

She doesn't know what his laugh sounded like or his favorite band. She doesn't know Keith Scott and now she never will. But she doesn't understand how a man people called great could be taken away from them. How God takes away human beings like we throw out leftover food. It's unfair and cruel.

And every time she looks at Keith Scott's headstone she thinks of her mother. And she wonders if her mom and Keith are up there in heaven. She wonders what they would say to each other if they ever met. She wonders if she'll ever meet the great Keith Scott.

The wind blows and she doesn't seem to care if there are dirt stains on her jeans. She hears leaves crackle behind her and she turns to see Lily. Brown hair and big brown eyes, this girl hasn't changed a bit. She remembers a time when she considered Lily her best friend. That was a long time ago.

"What are you doing here?" Lily asks once she sees Katy.

Katy just shrugs and stands up from her place on the ground. "I didn't want to be at home, didn't want to be at school."

Lily smiles and sets the flowers down on Keith's grave. Her hand lingers on the tombstone for a second, as if she's praying or talking or trying to remember. And then her eyes open and she's standing again, staring at Katy.

"You know, you can get in big trouble for skipping school." She smirks. "Ever since Haley became principle, she's been packing down on that rule."

Katy shrugs. "Well, then I guess we'll be in trouble together."

Lily just scoffs and turns to look at her father's grave. "I have an excuse."

"Yeah, and what's that?" Katy asks, crossing her arms over her chest and planting her feet.

"Nothing you'd care about." Lily says turning back to the tombstone ahead of her and blocking out the girl standing beside her.

"Do you have a problem with me, Lily?" Katy asks, getting down at her eye level. Lily looks over at her and can only smirk.

"No problem at all. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to visit my father."

Katy lingers back for a second, just staring the girl down, before turning back and walking away from her. She can only make it a few feet before she stops again.

"You know, I think you got the better end of the deal." Lily looks up at her, confusion written all over her face. "You never got to meet your father. He's never disappointed you or made promises he didn't keep. You don't have to go through any of that. My mom was just taken away without warning. So, it's not so bad.

"Not so bad?" Lily says, standing form her spot and walking over to Katy. "Don't you get it, Katy? I'll never know what my father's voice sounds like. He'll never hold my hand. Everything I know about my father, I've learned from pictures and stories that other people have of him." She says, looking the girl straight in the eye. "You had your mom for fifteen years, Katy. You have stories to tell. I don't have my own stories of my father. You think you got it bad? At least you got to meet your mom."

There's nothing left to say. Not to Lily, not to Katy. So, Lily leaves Katy standing where she is and walks back over to her father's grave. Katy tries to grasp anything she can inside her mind. She's feels horrible, but that doesn't replace the angry feeling inside of her. Her knuckles turn white and she feels like she's breaking skin from her fingernails. She turns to leave but her voice has her stopping again.

"It's his birthday today." Lily says, not turning around. She knows Katy will understand that. It's Keith's birthday. That's why she's skipping school. That's why she's not acting like the Lily she used to know.

Katy doesn't turn back or say another word. She thinks she's said enough.

"Yes, I know."

"I know and I'm sorry, Haley." Kimberly says into the phone. She's pacing the living room back and forth as Haley goes on and on about Katy. She's pissed. She's spent all afternoon looking for her sister, but there was no luck. Now she has to stand her and take it from Haley.

The doorbell rings and Kimberly couldn't pray for better timing. "Look, Haley, I'll talk to her, but I got to go." She says walking towards the door. Haley doesn't say bye or anything like that. She just hangs up. Kimberly looks to the phone and shrugs before throwing it back on the couch. The doorbell rings again and she rushes to open it.

He's popped out of nowhere for the past two days and now's not an exception. He's here, on her doorstep, still in his work clothes with his hair combed over in that sophisticated way he does it. He looks at her before back down at his fingers. He sighs and walks right past her, inviting himself in.

"Here's the thing." He says turning back to her. She closes the door and looks at him. "I've been thinking about it and I've decided that I don't like you being here." It's the last thing she expects to hear, but there it is. She thought they were going to be civil about this, but apparently he can't be. She opens her mouth to say something, but he stops her.

"No," He shakes his head. "I listened to you talk five years ago, now you listen to me. You broke my heart." He says firmly. "I came up to New York to see you, to see if you were OK, and you tell me how I'm not there and how you're with someone else."

He stands there, staring at her, waiting for her reaction. It reminds him of five years ago back in her apartment. She looks scared and vulnerable and back then he was fighting for her, now he's fighting to let her go.

"You broke my heart, Kimberly, do you get that?" He asks, not waiting for an answer. "And now I have to see you everyday and I don't want to because it took a lot to get over you. So, just do me a favor," He says quietly, his voice breaking. "And stay out of my life."

He gives her one last look, one last chance to stop him and say something so great that it will have him forgiving her. Because somewhere deep down, he believes there's something that she can think of, something great and meaningful that she could say for him to forgive him.

But she can't think of it. He's waiting and waiting like he's been doing for the past five years and her mind just seems to stop and she thinks there's nothing she can say. And he again, he's disappointed and hurt. She sees him shake his head and walk out the door. She can't muster up the strength to go after him.

She's stuck, frozen in that moment, for the longest time. Her eyes wander the room to see if he really left. He has and she feels empty. She doesn't want him to be mad, but she guesses it's her fault. She did end things and now she didn't go after him.

The front door opens again and there's a slither of hope that it's Tyler again. But it slams and that dream is shattered because she knows its Katy. Her little sister walks right past her without a second glance or a word spoken. Kimberly watches her as she walks through the kitchen to grab a water bottle and then on her way to her room.

"You skipped school today." Kimberly says, suddenly finding her voice.

"I know." Katy says before walking into her bedroom and slamming the door. It's not long before the music is blaring and Kimberly manages to walk back to her own bedroom.

Friedrich von Schiller once said, "Disappointments are to the soul what thunderstorms are to the air." Maybe Schiller had it right. Thunderstorms suck and so do disappointments.

That night when she tries to sleep all she feels is emptiness. Where Grace used to be, where the old Katy used to be, where Tyler always had her heart. And now they're all disappointments. She doesn't get her dream job the right way. Her mother is meddling in her life. Her sister isn't the child she used to be. Tyler isn't in love with her anymore. So many disappointments, but one sticks out.

She never went after him.


	8. Chasing Ghosts With Alcohol

"_And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music."_ –Friedrich Nietzsche

**Chapter Eight: Chasing Ghosts with Alcohol**

_Well it's been more than a year  
Since I lived by the sea  
And though we both have been moving  
You came back to me_

Monday morning. Ready for work. She's excited to say the least.

It's always been a dream of hers to work at Red Bedroom Records. Certain things held her back though, but not anymore. She's an employee now, getting paid for doing something she loves. Music. She loves it. Everyone knows she loves it. That's why she has this job.

She gets up early in the morning. Makes coffee and searches through her unpacked suitcases for something to wear. It's the first time since she's been back that she doesn't have to take Ally to school and she's thankful for that. She can't handle seeing Tyler right now. Not when she knows today is going to be a good day.

She's almost ready when she hears Katy's door open. She hears the footsteps that follow and then the door slamming. At least. She doesn't have to take Katy to school today. She just wishes her sister would talk to her though.

"So, she's ignoring you, huh?"

That voice. That voice sounds so familiar and unreal. It stops her in her place and almost has her terrified to turn around. It can't be her. It just can't be, because that voice is dead. She's not supposed to be here. That voice is not supposed to be heard ever again.

She musters up the courage to turn around and sure enough there's Grace. Her mother. Maybe not in the flesh and blood, but there sitting in the chair in the corner of the room. She's wearing just normal jeans and a tee shirt, no robes or halos or whatever movies taught us to believe. She just looks so alive.

"Surprised to see me?" She smirks, standing from the chair and walking across the room. As she gets closer Kimberly backs up. She keeps going until she hits the dresser and everything on top falls to the ground. Grace looks at the fallen items and then back to Kimberly, only smirking.

"This, this, this isn't real." Kimberly shakes her head. "You're not real."

"You're right." She says calmly. "But I'm here."

"Why?" Kimberly asks quickly.

"Because you need me." Grace shrugs and walking around the room, picking up random items and fiddling with them in her ghostly hands. "I see you're not doing good with Katy." She points to the door where Katy just walked by. "And that's OK." She nods. "You're doing your best and that's all I wanted you to do."

Kimberly still can't believe it. She doesn't believe it's really her mom standing in front of her. She doesn't want to believe it. So, she focuses more on the figure in front of her than the words she's saying.

"I know Brooke and everyone keeps telling you to give her time and that's what you need to do. Give it time." Grace says walking further to Kimberly. "But I want you to know, Kimberly, something's gonna happen. Something's that's going to make you and Katy closer."

"Wh, what?" Kimberly asks, her lip trembling.

"I can't say." She shakes her head.

"Is it really you?" Kimberly asks, ignoring the news she just received.

"Of course. Why wouldn't it be?"

"Because you're dead!" She says louder than expected. "You're dead! I saw you go into the ground. I was at the hospital. You're not supposed to be here. You're supposed to be…"

"In heaven?" Grace finishes. Kimberly lets out a sigh and nods. "I am dead, but right now I'm here to help you." Grace smiles and makes her way to the door.

"Wait, where are you going?"

"I got to get back."

"Where?"

Grace chuckles and turns to the door and back to Kimberly. "I'll see you soon, Kimberly. I promise." And then she's gone. The room's empty again except for Kimberly. The ghostly figure is no longer in sight and that feeling is gone. And she feels a bit crazy for believing she was ever here.

But she'll be back. She promised.

Her job's great.

She gets in early and the first thing she gets from Peyton is that 'I told you so' look she gets sometimes. Kimberly just rolls her eyes and asks for the things she has to do today. Mostly she's in the studio, helping out the artists. She had no idea Peyton had new people on the label. It's been a while since it was just Haley and Mia.

She tries to block out the image of Grace and keep her focus on work instead of Katy. But it's hard. Peyton knows she's going through a lot right now and she understands and is willing to do anything for the girl she considers a daughter. And she couldn't be happier to have Kimberly working here. She knew it was always a dream of hers to be here.

Peyton gets her a desk right by the window. She says it's a welcome gift. And when Kimberly sits down in front of it for the first time she sees pictures that Peyton have laid out for her. Pictures of her family and herself in high school. There's one of her and Brooke in Miami when they went there for Christmas her junior year. They're laughing and lying in the sand. Another is one Peyton took of her, Haley, and Brooke on a trip to Charlotte for the week. And she has no idea how Peyton got the last one, but it's one of her, Katy, and Hannah when she went up there to visit. A small Katy in her arms and Hannah by her side, both laughing at a joke.

She looks up from the pictures to see Peyton staring back at her with that know it all smirk she has before walking back into the studio. She looks at that picture again and sees how different they all are. And then she remembers she hasn't talked to Hannah in a few days. And now's really not the time to neglect her. It might be the time Hannah needs her most.

She wants to call her now, but knows it wouldn't be best to make personal calls on her first day of work. So, she goes back to work and she gets excited when she hears that Mia's coming back to town sometime next week. She hasn't seen that girl since her CD released in New York a few years ago.

But other than that piece of information, she works and waits and works some more. Eventually her lunch break comes and she finds herself not very hungry. After this morning and all her worry over Hannah, she's lost her appetite. But she has half an hour, so she goes to Brooke's.

"Hey, it' me, Kimberly. I haven't talked to you in a few days and I was just wondering how you were doing. Call me back when you can. Bye." She hangs up the phone and puts it back in her purse. She lets out a sigh and only prays that her best friend is doing OK. She pushes those thought out of mind before walking into the store. Surprisingly, Brooke's nowhere in sight.

"Hey, Millie." She says seeing the woman behind at the counter. She closes the gap between, pushing her sunglasses on top of her head. "Is my mom around?"

"She's upstairs on the roof." Millie smiles.

"Thanks." Kimberly says before walking to the back of the store and finding the old stairway. She hasn't been up on this roof in a long time. She remembers when Brooke used to get mad at her and Tyler for sneaking up here. They would skip school and hang out on top of the roof all day without anyone knowing. It used to be one of their spots. Now it's just a normal roof.

She opens the door and looks around the small roof for her mother. She doesn't expect to see the tough, invincible Brooke Davis crying. She's sitting on the bench over near the edge of the roof in her expensive dress and tears sliding down her cheeks.

"Mom." Kimberly grabs her attention. Brooke barely looks up to meet her eyes before going back to wipe away the tears. She knows she's been caught there's no point in hiding them anymore. Kimberly takes a seat on the bench beside and holds her hand. "What's wrong, mom?"

"Nothing."

"Mom." Kimberly says forcing her eyes to meet hers. "Tell me."

"We're getting a divorced." She spits out before a tidal wave of tears comes back. She takes the tissue in hand and tries to wipe them away, but it's no use. "Me and Julian."

"What? Why?" Kimberly asks, shocked. Though, now that she thinks about maybe she shouldn't be. Ally says they're always fighting. Julian hasn't even called her in the last few days to check up on her. He seems to never be home and she's always busy. Maybe she shouldn't be surprised by this. But it's her parents and she's been there since the first time they fell in love with each other. They're in love, she just knows it.

"He's having an affair." Brooke says, bringing Kimberly back from her thoughts. She hears those words, _affair_, and it sounds nothing like the Julian she knows. Maybe he's changed like she has.

"Brooke, are you sure?" She asks, not believing it.

"Yes, I'm sure." Brooke snaps at her. "He found a script to produce and once he found out little movie star Alex Dupre was starring in it, he jumped at the offer."

"OK, but Brooke, that doesn't mean he's cheating. I mean, you know Julian." She says shaking her head. "When he falls in love with a script he gets so passionate about it."

"Well, I can tell you another thing he's passionate about right now." Brooke says bitterly, all the tears now subsided.

"OK…mom…you can't…" She says, at a lost for words. "You can't just assume those things without proof."

"He was supposed to be home a month ago, Kimberly, and every time he had time off from work he doesn't come home. Instead he stays in Colorado with_ her_." She squirms. "I'm sorry, Kimberly." Brooke says, meeting her daughter's eyes, "But I can't be with someone that hurts me like that. I quit doing that a long time ago. I'm sorry you had to find out like this."

She's speechless. She doesn't believe it or want to hear it. Her parents are getting a divorced. Her father is having an affair. And her mother seems more broken than ever. It seems like her entire family is falling apart.

She doesn't believe that her father is cheating on Brooke. Maybe it's true; maybe she just doesn't want to believe it. But whatever it is, she needs to find out.

"I got to go." Kimberly says, standing from the bench. "I got to get back to the studio." She walks away before Brooke even has time to mutter a word. She's down the stairs and out the door before Millie can say goodbye. She's on the sidewalk and back at Red Bedroom in record time.

"Dad, I really need to talk to you. Umm…mom just told me, so please call me back soon." Again she hangs up her phone and throws it on her desk before collapsing in her chair. She's not even up for work anymore. She just wants to go home.

"Hey," Peyton walks in, clipboard in hand. "You ready to get back to work?"

Kimberly sighs and stands up from the desk. She decides not to ask about how long the idea of a divorce has been in Brooke's mind. It's not work material. She'll save that for another day. "Yeah. Let's go."

It's going to be a long day.

She doesn't go home after work. She's walking through TRIC and sees the bar and decides maybe one drink wouldn't feel so bad.

So, she finds herself a seat in the middle of the bar and orders herself a shot. She's not a very big drinker. Never was a big party girl, but she doesn't hate alcohol. She doesn't hate it at all. She just doesn't see the point in getting drunk. But tonight she might need to.

One shot turns into two, then three, four. A few different drinks are mixed in. Some she's never had. Some that she likes. And the next thing she knows, she's drunk. She can't see straight or stand up without wobbling. She still has a good view of her surroundings and she's just glad she's not getting hit on right now. That's the last thing she needs.

"Another one." She says, slamming her now empty glass on the counter. Before she knows it, another glass is placed in front of her and she doesn't hesitate to start drinking.

"Slow down." A voice says. She looks out of the corner of her eye to see three of the same blonde haired men take a seat in the same spot. "It will still be there when you set the glass down." He smiles.

"Maybe not." She says, slamming the glass down and asking for another.

"I think you've had enough."

"You don't know anything." She snaps, looking over at him with fierce eyes. Another glass is placed in front of her and before she has time to grab it he slides it away from her. "Give it back."

"I've been watching you. You've had plenty to drink tonight."

"You don't know shit." She says reaching for the glass again, but he slides it back farther. He calls the bartender over and asks him to take it for him and to not serve her anymore tonight. "Who do you think you are? You think you're big shit because the bartenders listen to you, right?"

He just chuckles and shakes his head. "I've never seen you around here." He yells over the loud music, ignoring her question. "You new?"

"That's none of your business." She shakes her head, clearly still pissed at him.

"You OK?" He asks, kinking his brow.

"Yeah." She nods. "I'm perfect, except for the fact that my parents are getting divorce, my sister hates me and my mom's haunting me. Other than that I'm fine."

"How can your parents get a divorce and your mom haunt you at the same time?" He asks confused. He tries to think about it, but decides not to. She's clearly drunk and can't think straight right now. "I'm Charlie."

"Great to know." She says sarcastically.

"I'll see you around, I guess." He says before standing from the stool and walking back across the room. He asks the bartender to keep an eye on her for a while and to not serve her any drinks. And for the rest of the night he keeps an eye on her too, making sure she doesn't do anything stupid.

It's not long before she passes out on the bar.

She wakes with a huge headache and a huge weight on top of her. Unfortunately, the headache feels a lot worse.

She rubs her eyes of the sleep stuck inside and squints when she sees the sunlight shine through the window. She tries to turn on her back, but the weight on top of her stops her. She looks up to see the problem is a small boy. One with curly blonde hair and green eyes and an innocent toothless smile. He looks to be about Ally's age, but he's on op of her while she's hung-over and she doesn't like that very much.

"Hi." She says groggily.

"Hi." The boy says happily, not bothering to move from his spot.

"Who, who are you?" She asks, finally able to lie back on her back.

"I'm William."

"OK, William, what are you doing…?" She stops to take a look around the room. The room she thought was her own isn't. This room is smaller than her own and it's blue and there is men's clothing everywhere. She thought she went home last night, but then she doesn't remember ever leaving TRIC. She doesn't remember a lot of last night. She looks back up to the boy on her lap and is ready to ask a question when someone walks in.

"Will, leave her be." He says, shooing the young boy off the bed and out the door. He looks familiar. Those blue eyes and that voice. It's familiar. And he looks a lot like…the guy she met at the bar last night.

She starts to panic, thinking she's done something incredibly stupid and tries to get out of bed. Her foot's barely on the ground before the pain rushes to her head and she's back down on the pillow. She looks over the edge of the bed to find her clothes, but they're not there.

"I'm more of the gentlemen type." The man says smiling at her, just seeing her frantic display. "Here, drink this." He says setting down a glass down on the bedside table. She looks at it suspiciously and back to him. "It's not poison or anything. It helps with hangovers. Trust me."

She takes the glass and lets the purple liquid slide down her throat. It taste horrible and the smell of it is awful, but once she swallows it she feels a bit better. "Thanks."

"No problem." He says, nodding his head. "After last night, you might need more than a sip though." He smiles.

"Where am I?"

"My place." He says simply. "You passed out at TRIC last night and I tried to get you home, but your license said you lived in Chicago. Visiting?"

"I wish." She chuckles taking another drink of the smoothie beside her. "I just moved back." She finds the energy to sit up in the bed. "Nothing…nothing happened last night, did it?"

"No." He shakes his head. "No, no, no." He says. She gives him a hurt look and he sighs. "I mean, not, not like that. You're a pretty girl and everything, but my kid was here and I don't have one night stands."

She nods her head, relieved by the fact that she didn't do anything stupid. "He seems like a great kid."

"Will? Yeah, he is." He nods.

"I have a sister his age. Maybe they know each other from school." She says smiling. OK, now she's flirting. And it's not really the right time to be. Hung-over in his bed, not knowing where her little sister is, but he's just so cute that she can't help herself.

"Maybe." He says quietly, smiling to himself.

"Well, I better get going." She says sitting on the edge of the bed and grabbing her shoes to put them on. "Thanks for everything. Not many strangers would do this."

"I'm not just any stranger." He says watching her stand from the bed. "Don't forget your smoothie. You'll wish you had it later on."

"Thanks." She says taking the glass from him. He shows her to the door and makes sure she gets to the elevator.

"My name's Charlie by the way, in case you didn't remember." He smiles just as she gets on the elevator.

"Kimberly."

He nods his head before letting out a chuckle. He can't believe he's flirting right now. "I'd liked to see you again, Kimberly, maybe when you're not drunk." He chuckles.

"I'd liked that. See you around Charlie." The doors close and it's just her, alone in the elevator. And she's still smiling. Maybe moving back wasn't so bad. She needed a change.

And Charlie might be the guy to change it all.

* * *

I know, I know ANOTHER KID. Some have complained about there being too many children in this story, but none of them play that big of a role. Ally has the biggest role of a child tops and that's not even saying that much. Will is going to be mentioned more than seen. So please don't be mad at me.

No Katy in this chapter, but she there will be a lot of her in the next one. Grace comes to give Kimberly some news that will supposedly change Katy and Kimberly's lives, but certain things have to happen before there are any life-changing events. Kimberly meets Charlie and she seems to really like him. Thoughts? Anyone? Things are only about to get harder.


	9. Bullet and a Target

Wow, sorry I haven't updated in so long. To make it up to you I'll update again on Monday. :D

"_You must not fight too often with one enemy, or you will teach him all your art of war." _– Napoleon Bonaparte

**Chapter Nine: Bullet and a Target**

_Now she ducked and she ran away  
Never to be heard from, never to be seen_

_I'm just wondering how, just wondering how_

^v^v^v^

Maybe it's the last thing she should be thinking about right now. There are so many things that could take up her mind. A few days ago, she learned that her parents are getting a divorce. Her sister has yet to give her the time of day. She met a guy, one that seems really nice. And her mother is haunting her. Haunting being used lightly, since she hasn't seen or heard from Grace in the past few days.

But the thing that stuck out to Kimberly most isn't any of that. It's what Grace told her.

"_But I want you to know, Kimberly, something's gonna happen. Something that's going to make you and Katy closer."_

Something's gonna happen. Something that makes her and her sister closer. But what is it? And does she believe it? She thinks she should. She saw her mother with her own eyes. Maybe that should be proof enough. But the thought that this important thing is going to happen to help her has her on the edge of her seat. She wants it to happen now.

She needs to be working. Not sitting around thinking about all the things that could happen to make her and Katy closer. But Peyton's out running errands and Haley nor Mia's here. She's alone and has nothing left to do but think. Sure she could find something productive, but why would she want to?

She's too busy thinking about her mom. She's been doing a lot of that lately. Thinking of all the missed time they had and all the years they spent apart. She thinks of the summers they had together and those late night talks they had at the kitchen table. She remembers her laugh and smile. Her eyes. It's all fresh in her mind and she can't even think of when the time comes when it's not anymore. Because she knows that will happen. New things will surface and she'll move on and that image of Grace will fade. She'll look at pictures to remember what she looked like, but the sound of her voice will disappear and she'll feel like she's forgetting her mother. She knows its called living, but she doesn't really want to live knowing her mother can't anymore.

"OK, mom, just give me _some_thing." She says to herself as she sits at her desk. Papers strewn everywhere and she don't really care to clean up the mess. "Anything. A sign. Just something."

Her phone starts to vibrate beside her and she looks at it quickly. It's a sign. She doesn't bother to check the caller id, she just answers it. It could be her mom.

"Hello?"

"Hey." It's not her mom. It's her dad. Julian. "How are you? I haven't heard from you in a few days."

"I'm good."

"Are you?" He asks and she can actually see his smirk over the phone. "I heard you moved back to Tree Hill and everything. I've really been out of touch lately."

"Yeah." She nods, though he can't see it. "Katy and I moved back into the old house. She's going to school and trying to get through this. Peyton gave me a job at Red Bedroom. Like I always wanted, remember?"

"Well, that's great. I'm happy you moved back. I can't wait to see you."

"Me too."

"Are you doing, OK, since the funeral? I know we haven't talked much, but I just want to make sure."

"I'm getting through it." She tries to stifle a laugh and it just comes out pathetic. "Best I can, right?"

"Yeah." He says quietly.

"Julian…"

"Listen, Kimberly," He interrupts her, "I got your message and this isn't the conversation I want to have over the phone. I'll be home Friday and then I'll tell you everything." He says desperately.

"Julian, just answer me one question. Are you cheating on Brooke?"

There's a silence over the line and for a second she thinks he hung up, but then she hears his steady breathing and now she just thinks he's wondering whether or not to lie to her.

"No." He says sternly. And she believes it. "I can talk a lot more about this when I get home on Friday. So, just keep your questions until then."

"I'll come pick you up from the airport." She offers quickly, without really thinking about it.

"No, Kimberly, you don't have to do that."

"But I want to." She smiles. "Besides, I think a lot more people have Brooke's back on this than they do you. So, I think you need me right now."

He chuckles into the phone. "Alright. Well, I got to get back to work, so I'll see you Friday. I love you, Kimberly."

"I love you too, dad." She hangs up the phone feeling exhausted. She's not sure who to believe now. Brooke or Julian. Her mom or dad. She doesn't want to take sides, but she finds herself believing her dad. He's never seemed like the man to cheat. And you're an idiot if you cheat on Brooke Davis. He knows that. She knows that. Maybe it's Brooke that doesn't know that.

She sets the phone back on her desk and sighs, running her fingers through her hair. It wasn't the sign she wanted. It wasn't a sign at all. It was just news. It had nothing to do with Katy or their relationship. And that's what she really wants to know.

Maybe it was all in her mind. The image of Grace. Maybe she concocted up something so bizarre that she just had to believe it. Maybe she's gone crazy. But it was so real and she swears she felt Grace's breath on her skin when she saw her. It's real. If that makes her crazy to believe, then she's crazy.

Her phone vibrates again and she all can do is stare at it. She doesn't want to answer, she doesn't want to check to see who it is, and she just wants to be left alone. And this is where Grace gets in her head. She's starting to believe that around any corner something will happen. A phone call could change her life. It kind of already has, but the next could make it better. That's why she can't let this one go unanswered.

"Hello?" She says into the phone. She listens to the familiar voice on the other end. It's not a personal call. It's all business and she hates that. She hates this call and the news she's receiving. "She did what?" The person repeats themselves and Kimberly's already up and out of her seat. "I'll be right there."

She bolts out the door without leaving a note or even thinking of calling Peyton. The only thing on her mind is her sister.

^v^v^v^

She walks the familiar blue and white hallways with a vengeance on the girl she calls her sister. She doesn't know the whole story, but she heard enough from Haley. And frankly, this doesn't sound a thing like Katy. But neither has all the other stuff she's been doing lately.

Her heels clamp against the tile floor when she walks into the office. She sees Katy from the corner of her eye and Kimberly can't even stand to face her. She sees Katy move to get up but Kimberly stops her.

"Don't get up!" Kimberly spats, pointing over at her. She doesn't care if the secretary sees and she really doesn't give a crap if it was a bit harsh. "Stay right there."

Katy takes her sit again and shuts her mouth. Kimberly thinks there might be an ounce of fear she saw. She turns back to the door in front of her and knocks. She's too impatient to wait, though, so she just walks right in, trying to be as calm as she can be.

"Haley." Kimberly sighs.

Haley looks up from her desk and gives a small smile. It's not a welcoming one; it's more stiff and professional. It's one she's never seen Haley wear and she doesn't like it.

"Take a seat." She says offering the seat in front of the desk and taking off her reading glasses. "Sorry we had to meet like this."

"What happened?"

Haley stands from her desk and walks around to the front, leaning up against the front of the oak wood. "Some girls were in an argument, it got pretty serious and Katy stepped in. It had nothing to do with her, but she did the most damage out of anyone. Word around school is that your sister has a heck of a right hook."

Kimberly sighs, glancing away from Haley and around the office. She remembers this office. It's where she took her test to get into the school. It's where she'd hang out with Haley some days after school. She'd never been here because she was in trouble. And now she's here because of her sister.

"Well, what about the other girls?" Kimberly asks, turning back to Haley. "Are they in trouble as well?"

"Some of the girls have already been punished, yes, but as for the others, no one's willing to talk, not even Katy."

"What's her punishment?"

"School rules say 4-day suspension." Haley says. "I'm sorry, Kimberly, but I can't give Katy a different punishment than what I gave the rest. No matter how well I know her."

"I understand." Kimberly nods, standing from her chair.

"And, Kimberly, I don't want this to happen again. I know you and Katy are going through a difficult time and I know she's taking this really hard, but I can't have fighting in my school."

"I understand." She repeats. "It won't happen again."

"Good." Haley nods and smiles. "Go ahead and take her home for the day. I'll talk to you later."

"Thanks, Haley."

^v^v^v^

The drive is quiet. Kimberly's pissed and Katy has no idea what to say.

It's not supposed to be like this. They're sisters, not enemies. When did the day come when all that changed? She sees Katy and tries to remember the sweet little girl she used to be. She looks in the mirror and tries to envision the girl she used to be. And she realizes now that the person she is, is not the person she wanted to be.

She wanted to be great. Successful and loving. She wanted her sister to be her best friend.

But it doesn't feel like enough.

She thinks there's more. For her and for Katy. So, she didn't turn out like the person she is, but she is this person. She either changes or deals with it. And changing is kind of hard.

Katy's out of the car before she can even park the car and stomping towards the door. Kimberly follows after. They never lock the doors; no one does in this town, so Katy is free to walk right on in, leaving the door wide open. It just makes Kimberly mad how Katy's the angry one in this scenario.

"I don't think so." Kimberly says stepping in front of Katy's door right when she's about to walk in. Katy huffs and tries again, but Kimberly's not having any of it. "On the couch. Now." Katy tries to stare her down, trying to make her crack, but Kimberly fights back. Katy gives a scowl before turning to sit on the couch.

Kimberly paces back and forth, still trying to process this whole situation. She never expected this happen. This isn't a part of the plan. Katy, sweet, loving, Katy, has turned into this moody, depressed teenager. She looks at her little sister and there's only Kimberly staring back. She can't, won't let her sister turn out like her.

"I don't even know where to start with you." Kimberly finally says. "Fighting? Really, Katy, what are you, in the fifth grade? It wasn't even your fight!" She yells, causing the girl to jump in her seat. "You got to grow up, Katy!"

"I have grown up!" Katy yells, standing from her seat, eyeing Kimberly. "I have grown up, OK? I'm not the little kid that I used to be. And, OK, maybe it wasn't my fight, but I'm not your responsibility."

"Yeah, I kinda am!"

Katy huffs, stifling out a laugh and turning away from Kimberly. "Things have changed, Kimberly, but you wouldn't know that."

"And what's that supposed to mean?" She asks through gritted teeth.

"You know exactly what it means." Katy says. "You tell me to grow up, well why don't you grow up! You go off to college and get this great job and then you completely shut us out of your life. If it wasn't for mom you wouldn't even be here right now! And you know that!"

"OK, Katy." Kimberly nods, trying to keep calm as possible. "Maybe I wasn't there 3, 4, 5 years ago, but I'm here now."

"But that doesn't make up for the time you've been gone." Katy says shrugging her shoulders. She lets out a chuckle for whatever reason and stares at her sister. People say that she's changed, but it's really her sister. "Don't you know how much you hurt mom when you didn't call? Don't you get it, Kimberly? You never saw the hurt look on her face when you called and said you weren't coming for Christmas." She shakes her head in what seems like disgrace. "And then you show up after seven years and play the hero, because that's what you've always been and everyone's so happy to have you back that they will block out the last seven years for you, but I will not do that."

"Katy…"

"No," she shakes her head. "And now here you are trying to be the responsible adult you think you are. Living in a house that's not even yours, working a job that was handed to you, and you expect me to believe that you really want to be here."

"I do." She nods. "I do, Katy. That's the truth."

"Well, then I don't believe it." Katy says firmly. "Go back to Chicago." She sighs. "It's what you want, right? I know you don't want to be here and have to take care of me. So just go."

"Katy, there is no place I'd rather be…"

"Stop lying to me!" she yells, finally frustrating with the woman she calls her sister. "Just quit lying to me and everyone else." She looks to Kimberly, waiting for anything from her. An apology, the truth, anything. But she keeps her mouth shut. And it's then that she really doesn't know her own sister anymore. And she can't stand to look at this person.

So she leaves. She walks out the door expecting to hear her name being called or Kimberly chasing after her. But her sister just stands there and watches her go.

She doesn't want to go back there. She doesn't think she can. For these past few years she's tried to let go of Kimberly the way she did to her. It's been hard and when she finally does it, her mom dies and Kimberly's back in the picture for good. And she knows they're both miserable. She just wants to put one of them out of their misery.

She doesn't really know where she's going. She hasn't bothered to walk around the town much. But she remembers most of it from summers here. Some places bring back good memories and they all hurt, because they all involve Kimberly.

But she keeps walking. Walking until she sees one road and then turns another and then a few more and before she knows it she's here. She doesn't know how. Her feet just kind of took over while her mind checked out. They led her here of all places.

She could turn around and find some other place to stay, but she finds herself not wanting to and her feet don't want to because they're leading her up the steps and to the door. She knocks on the door and before she knows it he's standing before her.

"Hi." She says a bit too quickly. He's still in shock that she's actually here.

"Hey." Jamie says opening the door a bit more. "What are you doing here?"

She shakes her head, shrugging her shoulder. "I was just wondering if I could come in." He sees she's exhausted and that she doesn't really want to talk about it. Somewhere deep down he knows it has something to do with Kimberly.

"Sure." He nods leading her in the house.

^v^v^v^

"Are you sure about this, Haley?" Kimberly asks into the phone as she reaches for a water bottle from the fridge.

"Positive." Haley responds. "Look, it's getting late and she's had a big day. She can sleep in one of the spare bedrooms. Plus, there's a part of me that thinks she might need a night apart from you."

"How'd you guess?" Kimberly sighs into the phone.

"It's written all over her face." Haley smiles. "It gets better, Kimberly."

"Yeah, that's what everyone keeps saying." She says before giving her goodbyes and hanging up the phone. The phone's quickly thrown onto the counter and fingers are through her hair. She doesn't want anymore phone calls or signs from haunting mothers or anything. She wants a good night's sleep. That's all.

But then there's a knock at the door and all she wants to do is throw a lamp at it. But she's an adult now, no matter how much Katy disagrees, and she has to answer it.

And as soon as she does, she wishes she didn't.

Before he can get a word out of his mouth she stops him. "Look, Tyler, before you come in here yelling at me again I just want you to know that I'm not up for it tonight. So can you come back some other time and do this?"

"I didn't come here to yell." He says calmly. "In fact, I came here to apologize." Kimberly stares at him for a second, thinking over the other night and their fight and all the history between them, and she lets him in.

He walks across the room and stops in the exact same spot he stood a few days ago and told her to stay out of his life. Now he's here saying the opposite.

"I said some things the other day that I'd liked to take back." He sighs, staring down at his hands. "I know I was harsh." He says, finally meeting her eyes. "But you got to understand that it's hard seeing you again. After everything that happened, it's just really hard."

"I understand that, Tyler, I do" She speaks for the first time.

"Good." He nods. "Because I'm not ready to be your friend again, Kimberly. I'm not sure that I can be." It breaks her heart to hear, but she figures it's the truth. She did break his heart in one of the worst ways in one of the worst times of their lives. He's has a reason to be this angry. "But I have to see you everyday." He continues, shrugging his shoulder, "and I guess I just have to deal with it."

It's all she can do is nod.

"So, I'm sorry, is what I'm trying to say."

"Thanks." She says quietly.

"OK," He nods. "So, I'll see you around then." He says receiving a small smile from her. He walks around her like just another person and lets himself out the door like he did a few days ago.

She thinks his apology hurts a lot worse than their fight.

^v^v^v^

The lights beam inside the old warehouse. The people are dancing and swaying to the music. They're all happy and cheerful and here she is, miserable in the midst of it all.

"Back for another round I see." She hears the familiar voice and maybe it's too early for it to be so familiar. But she still smiles all the same when she hears it. She turns to face him and he looks better than this morning.

"I was just grabbing my stuff." She says motioning to the things in her hands. She left so quick to get Katy that she didn't even bother to grab anything but her cell phone. "Is this what you do every night? Hang out at bars, looking for lonely drunk girls to take home to be the hero with." She smirks.

"Not exactly." Charlie chuckles. "I work here. I'm the bouncer."

"Really?"

"Yeah." He nods. "And from what Peyton tells me, you're the new assistant upstairs."

"Well, my cover's blown." She smiles. She's flirting. She doesn't flirt. And she really shouldn't be flirting at a time like this. Her sister walked out on her. Her ex-boyfriend just keeps breaking her heart and all in all, she's still waiting around for her mom to contact her. But all she has to do is look at Charlie and she's pudding.

"You OK?" He asks, sensing something wrong. She doesn't know how he can tell, but she's glad he can. She shrugs her shoulders, not wanting to lie to him. He likes that. "Well, I get off in a few minutes. If you want, we could talk."

"What about Will?"

"He's with my mom. So, what do you say?"

She doesn't even think about it. Not about Tyler or Katy or Grace. She just sees that smile. "Sure."


	10. Landslide

"_Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing is just a grain of sand." _–Carrie Underwood

**Chapter Ten: Landslide**

_Oh, mirror in the sky/__What is love?/__Can the child in my heart rise above?/__Can I sail through the changing ocean tides?/__Can I handle the seasons of my life?_

_^v^v^v^_

She likes Charlie.

She _really_ likes him.

He's funny and intelligent and charming. And he's just so different than anyone she's ever met before. They spend the entire night just talking. She doesn't speak much about her problems and he doesn't really ask. So, he tells her about William. And she notices how he lights up when the boy's name is spoken.

He tells her stories of back when he was in college. He explains the situation with his ex-girlfriend and how he dropped out just to be with her. Peyton gave him a job as a bouncer and understood his situation. He tells her about how much it hurt when his girlfriend left him alone with his newborn son and how he didn't bother to go off looking for her. He just wanted to be a good father.

But he doesn't stress much over the woman that ran away eight years and hasn't seen since. He mostly just tells her how much of a great kid Will is. And they swap stories of William and Ally.

He makes her laugh and forget about all of her troubles from the day. They talk until the sun comes up and when they get kicked out of TRIC. She has breakfast with him and neither of them is even tired yet. He shares his food like a true gentleman and refuses to let her pay the bill. He walks her back to her car and tells her that he hopes everything gets better. And she believes him. He pecks her on the cheek and slips his number in the palm of her hand. He walks away so confidently without looking back and she's left standing there, stunned.

The whole way home she's still thinking of him.

And then she walks in the front door and everything changes.

She's back in reality and has to face all the things she avoided last night. Katy's home and she's locked herself in her room. There's a part of her that wants to call Charlie or turn around and walk out the door to go see him. But that's her sister in that room; no matter how much she hates Kimberly.

She knocks quietly against the wooden door. She knows Katy could never hear that, but it's mostly her own fear keeping her from knocking harder. There's no answer of course, just loud music to fill in the silence. She knocks again this time letting out a quiet version of her name.

There's no answer.

Again, she knocks, this time harder and she knows Katy heard it. She's just choosing to ignore her. Then she finds her hand on the doorknob and her fear washing away and she sees her little sister sitting on the edge of her bed staring off into nothing.

Kimberly clears her throat and takes a step into the room. Katy still doesn't bother to look up. "Can I come in?"

"I'd prefer you not to."

"Yeah, well, I prefer to." She says leaving the door wide open, turning off the music and walking over to the bed to take a seat next to Katy. "We got to talk."

"You've been saying that a lot lately and there's nothing to talk about." Katy says, keeping her eyes on the hardwood floor in front of her.

"No," She shakes her head, "there's everything to talk about, Katy. Like last night for example." Kimberly looks to her sister, seeing if that will give her something. But Katy stays still and averts her eyes away from Kimberly, she doesn't speak a word and she doesn't bother to listen. Kimberly sighs, resting her elbows on her knees. The lack of sleep over the past few hours is finally getting to her.

"Look, Katy, I wasn't there." She shrugs a shoulder. "I wasn't there for your first days of school. I wasn't there for Christmas or summer breaks like I promised and I didn't call you every night like I said I would. OK? I broke the promise." She says, seeing if her sister will even look at her. She doesn't.

"I'm not gonna come up with some excuse about how I got busy when I went off to college. I won't do that." She shakes her head. "But I'm here now and I swear to you I'm not going anywhere. I'm here for good." She says sternly and still Katy will not look up.

"But," Kimberly continues. It's the last thing she has to say. She didn't want to bring it up, but she feels she has to. "If you want, you can go live with Hannah." It's then that Katy finally meets her eyes. They're full shock and she looks to be really considering the choice in front of her. "I'll give you time to think about it, but until then you're still suspended from school and I'm not going to have you lying around this house. So, until you go back you're going to be working at the café."

"What?" Katy says her first words of this conversation.

"You heard what I said." She says calmly. "She's expecting you at one. Don't be late." She doesn't say anything. Kimberly just gets up and leaves. She's got to be strict with Katy, she knows that, and she knows she hates to do it. It's for Katy's own good. It's time that girl starts to smile and laugh and have fun again. This may be a strange way to do it, but maybe it will work.

She walks into her the bathroom and sees the image of herself in the mirror. She looks tired. Not from staying up all night, but from years of hard work. All those years and here she is in Tree Hill working at a small label not many have heard of and living out of a house her mom still pays for. It's not the life she imagined.

And then she starts to think of it differently. Like, if Katy actually moved in with Hannah. What happens to Kimberly? If Katy leaves, does she stay in Tree Hill or go back to Chicago and start living her old life again like nothing ever happened. She doesn't think she could leave this town again like she did seven years ago. She left full of promises of staying in touch and smiles. She came back miserable and breaking every one of those promises. If Katy leaves her, she might be letting down Grace.

The woman that only asked her to do one thing. Take care of her daughter. And, Kimberly realizes, she can't even do that.

^v^v^v^

She doesn't like how busy the café is when she walks in. She was hoping for a slow day so she could just sit back and relax, but by the looks of things she won't be getting to do that.

She sees Lily behind the counter frantically moving from side to side. She decides to stand back and watch for a second, not wanting to help at all. Spending the day with Lily wasn't exactly what she had in mind.

They're not friends anymore. She understands that. There used to be a time when Lily was her best friend. They had sleepovers and went to the park. Kimberly would babysit them and they would cause hell for the older sister. There was a time when things didn't hurt as bad as they do now. That's why they call it the good ol' days.

She walks to the counter to meet Lily and when she gets there her elbows lean against the counter top as she stares over at Lily.

"It's about time you got here." She hears Lily say. Katy looks up to the clock and sees that she's forty-five minutes late. She lost track of time while she was avoiding coming here. "Well, are you just going to stand there or are you going to do something?"

Katy chuckles and bows her head. "Look, I'm here to work for Karen, not you."

"Well, Karen has gone to Charlotte with Andy for the day, leaving me, her daughter, in charge." She says handing Katy a notepad and pen. "I'm not asking you to do much. Just take the order, bring the order to the cook, and then take the food to the customer all with a smile. That's it. The rest I will do."

"You're in charge?" Katy asks, kinking a brow.

"If you need to hear it again, then yes."

"And Karen just leaves you here to do this by yourself?"

"Please," The teenager scoffs, "I've been doing this since I was a little kid. I can handle, question is can you?"

Katy smirks, wanting to say something smart back, but decides against. She takes the notepad and pen, opening it and turning towards the customers. "I think I can handle whether they want onions on their burgers or not." She says before walking off to meet the newcomers that just walked in.

"We'll see." Lily mutters before going back to work.

^v^v^v^

The music won't fill her mind like she wants it to. She tries, but it just won't. It feels different and not right. So she drives in silence. She doesn't want to listen to anything that isn't right.

And then the silence starts to not feel right. It feels different and louder and she just wants it all to go away. She wants to be able to sit in silence while driving down the street. She wants to pull over on the side of the road and scream at the top of her lungs.

But she can't. She has to pick Julian up from the airport in an hour and she's already running late. Her day's too busy and she realizes that nothing's going on. This is all her excitement consists of for the day. But it feels so busy and exhausting.

She's excited to see her dad, she is. It's been a while and facing this conversation they're bound to have isn't something she's looking forward to.

"You really let me down, Kimberly." She hears the voice and head jerks to the left and her car swerves off the road, but she's there. Grace. In her passenger seat as she's driving down the road.

It's not as big of a shock to her as it was last time. Besides, she did promise she'd come back. Kimberly just wishes she had a warning first. She sighs and gets herself back on the road before glancing over at her dead mother.

"What, what are you doing here?" She asks, a bit more annoyed than happy to see her. It's been a long night and it looks to be an even longer day. She doesn't really want to deal with dead mothers right now.

"You know why I'm here."

"No, I don't actually." She says gripping the steering wheel. "You show up out of nowhere, which is completely weird in itself, and you tell me that something's going to happen to make me and Katy closer. Well, news flash, that hasn't happened. And now I'm just starting to think that I'm going crazy."

"Well, maybe you are." She smirks.

"No, I'm not."

"That's not what all the cars passing you by are saying." Grace says. Kimberly looks out her window and sees an old woman drive by staring into her car. OK, maybe she does look crazy.

Kimberly sighs and glances over to her mother. She's really there. No one else might not be able to see her, but Kimberly can. There's no denying that.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Kimberly asks her voice soft and tired. Grace looks over at her, still smirking and playing dumb. "Why didn't you tell me or Katy about the aneurysm?"

"Let me ask you something," Grace says moving around in her seat. "If I would've told you, would you have come home?"

"Yes." She nods. "Of course I would have. I would've spent your last moments with you. And it makes me angry that you wouldn't let me."

"That's why I didn't tell you." She says simply. "I knew you would've came home. And I knew that once you did we would all ignore the last seven years and worry about me, but I didn't want any of that. Come on, Kimberly, you know me. I'm not the type of person that likes to be taken care of or likes to ignore the subject. You were off in Chicago living this wonderful, successful life. I didn't want to be the one to ruin it all by giving the bad news."

"Mom, that's ridiculous. I mean, you can't believe that. You're my mom and I think I would've liked to of known if you were sick or not. What you did, mom, it hurts. You just went off and died without anyone knowing."

"No." she shakes her head. "I died in my warm bed in the home I raised a beautiful child in. Besides," She shrugs, "We're not here to talk about me. We're here to talk about you."

"There's nothing to say."

"You sound a lot like Katy when you say that." She smirks. Kimberly looks over at her with a scowl before turning back to focus on the road. It's amazing she can still do that with a dead woman beside her. "What were you thinking? Asking Katy if she wants to go live with Hannah?"

"I was thinking that I can't do this." She says firmly.

"If I wanted Hannah taking care of Katy I would have put that in the will. But I want you to do that."

"OK, but why?" Kimberly asks a bit louder than she intended. "Why, mom? We both know I can't do it. Before I got that phone call my only responsibility was me and my work. I've never taken care of a kid before, especially a moody, depressing teenager."

"Yeah, but you've been one." Grace says calmly. "I know Hannah can take care of Katy and wouldn't say no if you asked her to, but you are her sister and it doesn't matter how much time apart there's been. You'll always be her sister."

"You say there's a sign." She shrugs. "You say something's going to happen. Well, what is it, mom? Are you going to string me along? Are you just kidding with me? Because it's not that funny of a joke."

Grace chuckles. "You're going through a lot. I understand that. But you can't give up." She looks over when she feels Grace's hand on her shoulder. "Be the Kimberly that I remember. She would never give up."

"I'm not her anymore." Kimberly mumbles, her lip almost trembling. "Things have changed. Things have changed me. And I can't take any of it back."

"But you can." She smiles. "You just got to reach out and grab it." Kimberly looks over at her for the longest time, not wanting to break the contact. "I got to go."

"You can't." Kimberly shakes her head. "No, you can't leave. Not yet. You got to tell me about this sign. How do I know when it's here?"

"You'll figure it out." Grace smiles. "Oh, and Kimberly." Grace adds. Their eyes meet again and Kimberly doesn't want it to stop. She doesn't ever want it to stop. "Just look out."

"What?" She asks, her eyebrows scrunching together.

Grace smiles and points to what's outside her window. It's then that Kimberly finally sees the red pickup truck coming her way.

^v^v^v^

"I'm tired." Katy mumbles as she lays her head on the counter in the café. Its closing time and all the customers and workers are gone. It's just Lily and Katy now. She's too tired to hear Lily's chuckle as she sweeps by her. She's really too tired to do anything.

"Told you so." Lily laughs. Katy lets out a frustrated groan and tires to get comfortable on the counter, planning on passing out there. Who knew being a waitress could be so difficult.

"I mean, why can't people just order what's on the menu and eat it?" Katy mumbles, her hair falling in her face. She sits up from the counter and tries to find Lily. "I didn't really care if you like pickles on your burger or not, just eat and leave."

Lily appears from the kitchen, chuckling to herself. "That's the thing about customer-service, their always right; you just got to deal with it."

"That doesn't look like it's going to be happening." She says laying her head back down on the counter.

"Are you going to help or not?" Lily asks, putting all her weight on the broom in her hand. "The faster we get this done the faster we can leave." She says checking the setting sun and estimating exactly how much time she has before it gets dark.

"I'd rather not help." Katy says smirking over at the girl. "Besides, you look like you got this under control. While you're doing this, I'll be outside smoking." She says reaching for her bag and her pack of cigarettes.

"You know those things are going to kill you."

"Thanks, but I've seen the after school specials." She glares making her way towards the door.

Lily scoffs. "You know what you're problem is?" She says, stopping Katy in her tracks and forcing her to turn around. Katy gives a coy smile and lets her continue. "You have the inability to be nice to anyone. Anytime someone gives you a compliment or tries to help you, you shrug them off like they're nothing."

"That's my problem?" Katy asks taking a step further. "See, now I thought my problem was is that my mom just died and my sister, who I haven't seen in a year, pops back up to take care of me. I thought my problem was that I have to live in this town with these people that I don't want to be with. That's what I thought my problem was, but it turns out I'm just a bitch. So thank you for clearing that up for me." She smiles turning on the heel of her foot and back towards the door.

"Really?" Lily stops her again. "You're gong to play the dead mom card? That's a little pathetic don't you think."

Katy turns back around, ready to tear one out of this girl. "Look, you don't know anything about me. We're not friends anymore, remember. I'm sorry that I'm still grieving over my mom, but it only has been a few weeks."

"I understand that you're still hurting, but you're right, it has been a few weeks and you have yet to even try to move on. All you do is walk around this town with this huge weight on your shoulders while you shut everyone out. And you don't even realize what's going on around you."

"None of it matters to me."

"I'm sure it doesn't, but that doesn't mean you have to be a bitch about it." Lily shrugs, placing the broom in her hand against the counter. "I understand death and losing someone. Maybe not the way you did, but it's all the same. It's still death and we still deal with it. But when are you going to take that step further to moving on?"

She's about to say something. Something that's going to have Lily on the edge of her seat. Something that's going to make her feel so bad. Because Lily doesn't know what's going on inside her mind. She doesn't know all the times her and her mother spent together and all the stories they told and all the memories they'll never get to make together.

Lily will never understand that. And Katy's about to tell her. But the bell above the door rings and the door flies open and in walks Brooke in a panicked state. She looks around the restaurant until her eyes meet Katy's.

"Katy…" Brooke trails making her way to the counter. "There's been an accident."


	11. Uncomfortably Numb

"_You must be strong now. You must never give up. And when people make you cry and you are afraid of the dark, don't forget the light is always there." _-Unknown

**Chapter Eleven: Uncomfortably Numb**

_The first time's the worst time  
Then you become so uncomfortably numb  
That you can't hide the fake smile  
Stare into space with a look on your face_

Her mind races. Her feet move along the sidewalk. And she finds herself…crying for the first time in a _really_ long time.

Her sister was in a car wreck. She doesn't hear all the details Brooke gives her. She can't hear anything, the thought that her sister might be hurt or even worse, is killing her. But she can't just stand in that café and listen to Brooke. So, she turns around and walks back to the kitchen. She hears Brooke's frantic voice calling her back, but she can't turn back. Because she feels like she's facing a reality and right now she doesn't want to face any of it, even if she knows she should.

She hears the bell above the door ring and Brooke's voice disappears. She must have gone to the hospital. Katy doesn't blame her. Brooke should be there to check on things. It might be a while before Katy can really focus and actually force herself to go to the hospital.

She sits on the roof for a while. She's not sure how long, but the sun's starting to go down and maybe if she wasn't in this state of mind, she would think that that sunset is pretty beautiful. But she just watches it fall. She can hear birds chirping and kids playing on the sidewalk down below and the world's still moving, she realizes. And she doesn't like it. Her sister could be dead and people are walking by like it's nothing to them. And she just wants to scream at them, because it's her sister and Kimberly's all that she has.

Without her, there's nothing.

So, she starts crying. And everything hurts, inside and out, and she doesn't know how to deal with this. Her face is numb and her eyes are rimmed with red and she just wants to hit…something. Anything to release this pent up anger. She could lose her sister and all she can do is just sit here.

Arms wrap around her shoulders and she doesn't have to look up to know its Lily. She's happy she's there, because she doesn't know what to do after this. But Lily just holds her for the longest time and let's her cry and she just waits until Katy's ready. And maybe that's all she needed. Someone to just wait until she's ready.

"Let me drive you to the hospital." Lily says as Katy's wiping away the stray tears from her face.

"I don't know if I can see her." Katy admits quietly.

"I know, but going is the first step. We'll deal with the next when we get there." Lily forces Katy to look up at her. "I'm here, Katy. Everything's going to be OK." She promises and maybe she shouldn't make promises like that, but she feels that she needs to. Lily knows that deep down Kimberly can't leave. She can't leave Katy behind. No one's ready to have such a special life taken from them.

"Come on." Lily helps her up and walks her down the stairs. She sits her down at the counter while she locks up the place before finally taking her out to her car. The ride's quiet. No one bothers to fill the silence with the radio and neither dare to speak.

The ten minute drive feels like hours and when they reach the parking lot Katy doesn't hesitate to jump out of the car and run towards the entrance. She gets the information she needs from the lady at the desk and Lily has to run to make the elevator ride with Katy. The short ride has Katy fidgeting and as soon as the doors open she's bolting down the hall again.

It's when she sees everyone in the waiting room that she finally slows down. Lucas and Peyton are sitting next to Nathan while Haley walks from one end of the small room to the other. Out of the corner of her eye she can see Jamie bobbing his knee impatiently.

Everyone looks up to the two new figures in the room and in an instantly everyone's to their feet. It's Haley that pulls Katy away and Lily and Jamie are following close behind.

"What's going on? How's Kim?" Katy asks frantically.

"Doctor says she's gonna be fine." Haley says. Katy and Lily let out a huge sigh and Jamie makes sure to slip his hand into Katy's. Right now, she doesn't really care. She just wants to be with her sister. "But, she hit her head pretty bad and right now she's in a coma."

"But she's gonna be OK, right?" Lily asks

"That's what the doctor says. Right now, we just have to wait for her to wake up. However long that takes is up to her."

"Where's Brooke and Julian?" Lily asks, moving in front of Katy who seems to be in a state of shock.

"Kimberly was on her way to pick up Julian from the airport when she got hit. We tried calling him and leaving messages, but so far we haven't heard anything from him. And Brooke's in Kimberly's room waiting for her to wake up." Lily nods and walks over to sit next to her big brother. Haley looks to Katy and her son. She notices how pale Katy looks and the blank look on her face. "Katy." Haley catches her attention. "If you want, you can go talk to her."

Katy looks at Haley with an empty expression and then down to the hand in hers. She gently lets go of it and suddenly she feels claustrophobic. "No thanks." She shakes her head before turning around to leave.

Everyone watches the girl leave and it seems as if no one's brave enough to go after her.

"I'll go get her." Haley says.

"No." Jamie stops her. "I'll go."

"You sure?"

"Yeah." He nods. "I made a promise to Kimberly."

^v^v^v^

He finds her sitting outside on a bench under a tree. He watches her for a few moments as she runs her fingers through her hair. He can see the stress in her eyes and the worry on her face. He feels so bad for her. And all he wants to do is just help.

His steps are large, as all he wants to do is get over there to her and just talk to her, even if she doesn't feel like talking.

"She's OK, Katy." He says taking the seat next to her and looking out towards all the people passing by them.

"I know." She nods, looking down at her feet kicking the dirt. "But there was a possibility that she couldn't have been."

"You can't think like that, Katy." He says trying to get her to look him. "Everyday we wake up taking the chance that we're gonna get hurt, and most of the time nothing happens."

"But something did happen!" She snaps at him, finally looking at him. "Something happened to Kimberly."

"She's fine, though."

"But that doesn't make it OK!" She yells, drawing the attention of the people close by. Jamie looks to the strangers and then back to her. He doesn't care about them. It's just her. "You don't get it, Jamie. If Kimberly's gone, then I have nothing."

"First off, Kimberly's still here. And secondly, you wouldn't have nothing. You'd still have me, because I told you from day one that I'm gonna be here and I haven't let you down yet, have I?"

She just nods her head and looks back down to her feet, kicking the dirt below. He takes a big risk with her and reaches over to hold her hand. And it surprises him when she doesn't pull away or give him a glare. She doesn't do anything. And he thinks maybe he could get used to this. Being there for her all the time.

"I still don't want to see her." She says quietly. "Not when she's like that."

"OK." He nods. "We'll wait until she wakes up."

^v^v^v^

She can hear their voices. The doctors, the nurses, her friends and family. They say that she can't hear them and doesn't understand what's going on, but Brooke doesn't believe them. So she keeps talking to her. And she's never been happier to hear that voice ever in her life. She zones in and out of what Brooke's saying, but she can feel her hand holding hers and that alone is good enough.

Her brain has seemed to stop and she can't get it to start working. She wants to wake up and hug her mom. She wants everyone to know that she's OK. She just can't get her brain to start working.

It's only Brooke's voice that she hears. Knowing her mom, she probably hadn't allowed anyone else in the room. But it's still comforting to know that everyone else is waiting close by.

"You're an idiot, you know that." She hears Brooke say through scattered tears. "You can't scare me like this, OK? You have to wake and tell me you're OK or else I won't be able to sit here and look at you like this. So just wakes up." She says clutching her daughter's hand a bit tighter. "Just wake up."

She doesn't wake up.

A few more hours pass by and eventually the sun goes down. She can feel the presence of someone else in the room and she's glad to hear that it's Peyton's voice trying to convince Brooke to go get some coffee.

"I got to stay here." Brooke simply tells her. Peyton just nods, understanding her situation and walking out of the room. "You hear that." Brooke says to the sleeping Kimberly. "I'm not going anywhere until you wake up, so hurry because I really have to pee." She tries to joke, but it's only followed by silence.

It's another hour and Kimberly senses the tiredness in Brooke's voice. But she's still talking because she believes Kimberly can hear her and that maybe it will help some. It's helping, Kimberly can feel it. She can feel one of her fingers move, Brooke doesn't notice it, but Kimberly can feel her body take over and do it. It feels kind of good. She just wants Brooke to see it though.

"OK," She hears Brooke's voice again. "You're forcing me to do something that I don't like to do. But because you're my daughter and because I need you to wake up, I'm going to do it. I'm going to be vulnerable." She says looking down at Kimberly's hand and giving it another squeeze.

"I need you, Kimberly. Honestly, you're the only one that really understands me and you're the only one that knows what's going on right now. I need you. I can't lose you. Not like this."

She swears she feels it. The slight movement of fingers when someone's waking up. Brooke looks down at the fingers intertwined with hers, waiting for that movement she knows she didn't just imagine. And they do it again and each time the grip gets stronger. Brooke looks up just in time to see Kimberly's droopy eyes open.

"Hi." Kimberly croaks.

"You scared the hell out of me." Brooke says standing to her feet and hugging the girl in bed.

"What happened?" She says adjusting her eyes to the light in the room.

"You don't remember?" Brooke asks seeing Kimberly shake her head no. "You got into a car wreck. You ran a stop sign and someone hit you." Kimberly doesn't remember that part. She just remembers seeing her mom and actually talking to her. Everything after that is a blur.

"Is the guy OK?"

"Yeah, he's fine. You're worst than he is. Doctor says you have a few bruised ribs and you're leg is banged up pretty good, but other than that you're perfectly fine. So this whole coma thing was totally unnecessary."

"Sorry, I just wanted to make a big show." She chuckles.

"Well, don't do it again." Brooke says kissing the girl's forehead.

Brooke takes a seat back in the chair and grabs her daughter's hand again. The two just smile at each other as Kimberly gets used to the new found energy she's trying to gain. Brooke helps her sit up in bed and gets her a glass of water.

"Where's Katy?" Kimberly asks once she's all situated.

"She's right out in the waiting room. I'll go get her." Brooke says standing from her chair and walking out into the hall.

It's not long before the door opens again and Kimberly's staring into the dark blue eyes of her little sister. She looks like a wreck, like she hasn't had any sleep in the last few hours and she almost looks like she's been…crying. Brooke stands in the doorway and watches as Katy slowly closes the small gap between the two sisters.

Katy gently takes a seat on the bed and can only stare at Kimberly. Kimberly just gives her a small smile, telling her that she's fine and it's then that Katy realizes how close she came to losing her. She leans down and wraps her arms around Kimberly and starts letting everything out. Kimberly tries to soothe her and move the hairs away from her face, but they both don't care. Kimberly realizes that this is it. This is that something Grace was talking about. It's a breakthrough.

"Hey," Kimberly says, making Katy lean up, "You're not getting rid of me that easily." She smiles. Katy only nods and lays herself down in the bed beside Kimberly.

^v^v^v^

As she feels the normal pattern of the girl's breathing, Kimberly finally lets out that breath she's been holding. She can finally relax, because now she knows that she's OK and Katy's OK and nothing else really matters.

Brooke went home to change and so far almost every one of the group has managed to sneak in against the doctor's orders. They just want to make sure she's OK, which is something she loves about them. She's like a child to every one of these people, not just Brooke. Even now, as she's an adult, she still feels like these people are her true parents.

Haley and Nathan sneak in first and it takes everything in Haley to keep herself from crying. Nathan rolls his eyes and chuckles when he sees Kimberly try to stifle her laugh. And only Jamie can understand the sleeping girl in her arms. They quickly leave when the nurse shoots them a look, but not before Kimberly gets a hug from each of them, all without managing to wake up Katy.

Hannah shows up next and even Kimberly's surprised to see her.

"What are you doing here?" she asks when her best friend walks in the room.

"My best friend's in a car accident and you expect me not to show up. What kind of person do you think I am?" She chuckles sitting down in the chair beside the bed.

"You didn't have to come. I'm fine."

"I know." Hannah nods. "But I figured you might need my help around the house, so, I think I'll stay a while."

Kimberly sighs, not liking the idea one bit. "What about work? You can't just take off all of a sudden."

"I can if it involves my best friend." She says grabbing Kimberly's hand and staring her in the eye. "Besides," She shrugs, "I like Tree Hill. It's kind of growing on me." They both chuckle. She remembers being a teenager and telling Hannah that's exactly what happens when you get to Tree Hill. It grows on you and eventually you're there so long that you just can't leave. Any other place would just seem strange to you. That's what she loves about this place.

"I'll see you tomorrow." Hannah smiles and gets up from the chair.

"Thanks, Hannah." Hannah just gives a nod and looks from Kimberly to the sleeping girl in her arms. And the only thought in her mind that maybe things are going to get better.

It's a while before she gets another visitor. And she's happy to see Peyton standing in the doorway. "Hey." Kimberly says trying to sit up in bed without waking the girl up in her arms. "Where's Lucas?"

"He's pulling the car around." She shrugs. "How you feeling?" She says taking the seat beside the bed.

"I'm doing better. I got a banged up leg and a few bruised ribs, but the doctor says I'll be just fine." Kimberly says shrugging it off like it's nothing. And it is to her, but to everyone else, it seems to be big deal.

"That's good." She nods. "But just to be safe, I don't want you back at work until you can walk again."

"Peyton." She starts, shaking her head.

"No, I mean it." She interrupts. "I can't have you wobbling around the studio and falling down stairs. So do as your boss says and don't come back until you can walk on that leg again, no matter how long it takes."

Kimberly just smiles and looks down at the girl sound asleep in her lap. She looks back up at Peyton who was watching Katy too. "Thanks, Peyton."

"No problem. You just worry about getting better."

"I will." She nods. "But can you do me a favor?" Peyton looks at her quizzically and nods her head. "You think Katy could stay with you for the night? Brooke's not here to take her home and I don't really want her staying by herself. It'd just be for tonight."

"Sure." Peyton smiles.

Kimberly looks down to Katy and nudges her gently. The teenager mumbles something before trying to turn around to her other side. The two adults laugh. "Katy." She whispers. "Katy, you need to get up."

Katy leans up in the small bed and tries to wipe the sleep from her eyes. She looks over to see Peyton in the room and notices the eerie quietness in the building. "What's going on?"

"You got to go. You're gonna stay with Peyton for tonight."

"Can I just stay here with you?" She asks, trying not to notice the smiles from both Peyton and Kimberly.

"Sorry, but it's been a long night and you got to get up early to go to Karen's and it's gonna take a lot more than your sister in a car wreck to keep you from going. You're still on my hit list, remember?" She chuckles, seeing that it's really not that funny of a joke. "I know you want to stay, Katy, but me and you both need to get a good night's sleep. But when you get home tomorrow, I'll be there. I promise."

Katy just nods her head and slowly stands up from the bed. Peyton stands to and grabs her purse before following Katy out the door. "Hey, Peyton," Kimberly stops her, "Thanks."

Peyton just nods and sends her a smile before walking out the door. Like a mom would. Now she's just waiting for her mom to show back up. Both of them.

It's not long before another knock comes at her door. She's almost asleep, but quickly wakes up when she sees Julian's smirk in the doorway.

"I didn't mean to wake you." He says quietly.

"You didn't." She assures, ushering him to come in more. He closes the door behind him and takes a seat in that chair beside her bed. Grabbing her hand he lets out a sigh of relief and looks up at her from under his brows.

"You scared me."

"I know." She nods.

"I feel like this is my fault. You were coming to get me."

"It's not." She says, struggling to sit up in bed more. Julian quickly gets to his feet and helps her by adjusting the pillows. She mouths a 'thank you' and settles back into the bed. "I was distracted. The accident had nothing to do with you."

"Well, in that case, you need to be more careful."

"I will, dad." She smiles at him when he sees that hint of a smirk he's trying to hide. He loves it when he hears her call him that. It means more to him when Kimberly says it than when Ally does. It sounds mean to admit, but it's not. He just loves how Kimberly accepts him as her father. "Since you're here, do you want to talk?"

"Sure." He nods, letting out a sigh.

"OK. Julian what's going on? Is it true?" He looks at her, not with hurt or eyes of disbelief, but they're ones filled with confusion and questions of his own. Before he can answer the door flies open and Brooke stands in the doorway. She looks at Kimberly and then to Julian and she just seems to freeze. It's the first time they've seen each other in a few months and they don't like the way they've had to do it.

"Kimberly needs to get some rest." Brooke says averting her eyes away from him. She doesn't bother to say hello or ask how he's doing. She just keeps it in a true Brooke Davis style and avoids the elephant in the room.

Julian nods and looks back to his oldest daughter. "We'll talk tomorrow." He promises and Kimberly gives him a nod before he stands and kisses her forehead and moves the loose strands of hair away from her face. He grabs his jacket and walks to the door where Brooke still hasn't moved.

"Ally's at Haley's right now. If you want, you can pick her up and stay with her tonight. She'd loved to see you." Brooke says quietly, but keeping her eyes forward.

Julian gives her nod and gently touches her arm, causing her to finally look at him. He sees those hazel eyes and he just wants to start apologizing for things he never did. He just wants her back; it doesn't really matter if he's done something wrong or not. "Thanks, Brooke."

Kimberly watches the whole scene and she hates to see her parents, two people that were always so in love, fall apart like this. Not like this. They've always found their way back to each other. Something like this can't break them.

She won't let it.

^v^v^v^

The small light in the corner wakes her up in the middle of the night. It was pretty late when she went to bed, but it's to the point where everyone in the world seems to be asleep. It's quiet and peaceful and it's a perfect time to just sit and think about the world. She used to do exactly that when she was kid, not so much now, though, there's a lot she can think about.

But right now she just wants to sleep. Her eyes blink open, trying to adjust to the small amount of light in the room and she can make out Brooke in the corner of the room reading a book. She leans up in bed, wiping away the sleep from her eyes. "Hey."

Brooke looks up from her book and gives a small smile. "Hey." She closes her book and walks over to the bedside. "I'm sorry, did I wake you?"

"No." She lies. "What are you still doing here?"

"I wanted to make sure that you're OK." She shrugs rubbing the stray hairs that had fallen away from Kimberly's face.

"You heard the doctor, Brooke. I'm fine. You don't have to stay." She smiles.

"I know, but I don't feel right leaving you."

"Well, then get in." She says scooting over in the small bed and raising the blanket for her. "I'm not letting you sleep in that chair. It looks uncomfortable."

"You need to get some sleep, Kimberly. Good sleep." She says ignoring the spot next to her daughter.

"Mom, just get in the bed." She says one last time giving her a look of warning. Brooke rolls her eyes and gives out a sigh before taking the blanket and getting in the bed next to her daughter. "Hey, Brooke." Kimberly says once they're both comfortable.

"Yeah?"

"You left the light on." Brooke peeks over the blanket and sees the tiny light in the corner that she had forgotten to turn off. Brooke moves to get out of bed, but Kimberly pulls her back. "Just leave it." Kimberly shrugs and Brooke smiles and wraps her arm around her daughter's figure. It really does remind her of a time years ago when they slept like this every night.

They fall into a silence as they try to rest their eyes and fall asleep. But they can't. So, they pretend to be asleep, but they both know the other's faking it. Kimberly's talked to what seems like everyone today, everyone except Brooke and she feels like she has the most to say to her. She has questions to ask and things to say and admit. And she just needs her mom right about now.

"You really did scare me today." Brooke says quietly.

"I'm sorry."

"I mean, I know it was an accident and that you're OK, but…what if you had died?" Kimberly turns around in the bed to protest this conversation, but Brooke stops her. "You got to think about that kind of stuff, Kimberly. What would happen to Katy if you die? You're all she has left. She can't lose you. I can't lose you. None of us can."

"I know." Kimberly nods. "But, Brooke, I don't plan on going anywhere any time soon.

"Yeah, but that's thing about accidents. They're never planned. So, just be careful, OK? There's too much to lose."

"OK." She says moving as close to her mom as she can. "So, did you see Katy when she came in here?" Kimberly chuckles, trying to change the subject.

"Yeah."

"I mean, I loved it and everything, but it was kind of weird to see her like that. I haven't seen nice Katy in while."

"That's what fear does to you. It makes you realize what can be gone in just a flash." Brooke feels a faint nod against her stomach and she rubs her hand along Kimberly's arm, trying to comfort the girl. There's a silence again and maybe this time they'll fall asleep.

But of course she starts thinking about Brooke's words. And how things can disappear so fast from your life. It makes you wonder if you ever really had a chance to reach out and grab it.

"Hey, Brooke, can I ask you a question?"

"What?" She mumbles.

"Did Tyler happen to come by?" Kimberly asks looking up at her mother's half asleep face. She doesn't even open her eyes or stiffen at the name. Brooke thinks the two are just friends, or that's what Kimberly thinks anyway.

"No." She shakes her head lightly. Kimberly rest her head back down, somewhat disappointed. "But you did get flowers from someone named Charlie."

Kimberly looks up again. First to her mother and then around the room. Her eyes land on the bouquet of flowers on the table across the room. The faint light helps her see the beautiful red tulips.

And the thought of Tyler never showing up is erased with the thought of Charlie.


	12. Brand New Day

"_It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change."_ – Charles Darwin

**Chapter Twelve: Brand New Day**

_Most kind of stories  
Save the best part for last  
And most stories have a hero who finds  
You make your past your past_

^v^v^v^

She wakes up in an unfamiliar bed in an unfamiliar room. But the pillows smell comforting and like laundry detergent and she kind of likes it. It reminds her of home.

When she sits up though and she takes in the light blue room, things change. Everything comes rushing back to her and she remembers why she's here. She's still in her clothes from yesterday and she feels dirty and tired all over. And it's not sleep tired. Its emotional tired.

She pushes the blanket behind and reaches for her socks and shoes. Tying them carefully and slowly she thinks of everything from last night. From Kimberly to Peyton taking her home to Lily helping her get to the hospital to Jamie holding her hand. She's staring off into space as she sits on the bed and she doesn't even notice Lucas walk in.

"Hey. How'd you sleep?" He asks standing n the doorway with a cup of coffee in hand. She inhales the scent she grew up smelling and for the first time she thinks she could really use a cup.

"Fine." She nods, still kind of nervous. She doesn't know Lucas and Peyton. She remembers them from when she was little and they used to babysit her, Lily, and Jamie. But she's never been on a personal level with either of them.

Lucas smiles and walks the rest of the way into the room. He takes a seat on the edge of the bed next to her and sighs, taking a sip from his mug. "Crazy night, huh?"

"Yeah." She chuckles, even though there's nothing to laugh about. "Have you talked to Kimberly?"

"Peyton did earlier. Said she hasn't left the hospital yet. It will be soon." He shrugs. He looks to Katy who only gives a nod and then there's silence. "You know, Katy, I've been wanting to talk to you." Katy looks to him, shocked to hear the words from his mouth. Why would Lucas want to talk to her?

"I'm sure you've heard about my Uncle Keith, Lily's dad." Katy nods. "I'm sure you've heard how he died too." Again, Katy nods, this time a bit slower. "He was like a father to me. He treated me like I was his son. I was only a little older than you when he died." He shakes his head, looking away from her and to the blue painted walls, rethinking that whole experience to himself.

"I remember…I remember thinking that it wasn't fair, you know? Keith was the nicest guy I'd ever met. Sure he had a few flaws, but who doesn't? And I remember thinking, how does God take away someone so great? You know?"

"Yeah." She nods.

"I was so angry." He says looking to her again. "So angry that he was gone, that he wouldn't be there when I got married or had kids or graduated. That he and my mom would never get their chance and that Lily would grow up without a real dad like I did. And when I found out, I remember being angry that my father had the ability to kill his own brother." He says, his eyes empty. Every time Keith is spoken of they do that. Their eyes are empty as if that spirit that used to be there is now gone. And only Keith could ever put it there.

"But I got over it." Lucas says quietly. "It took a while, but I learned that…Keith isn't coming back." He says roughly staring at Katy. "No matter how many times we cry or place blame or play the 'what if' game, he isn't coming back. I had to understand that and with that knowledge I just moved on."

"But it's hard." She mumbles.

"Yeah, I know." He nods. "But look at Peyton. Her mom died when she was eight and for years she carried that weight around, hiding in her art and music and just being a bitch to everyone." He chuckles remembering how things used to be back in high school. "But she met me and she met Haley and Brooke changed and Nathan and Haley got married and everything was just so different. And by senior year, by letting people in, Peyton wasn't the same girl she was at sixteen and I wasn't the same boy. We were all different."

"I bet high school was pretty weird for you guys." She chuckles knowing he'll know what she's talking about. He knows she's read his book. Everyone has.

"Yeah." He nods with a smile. "But I wouldn't take any of it back. It's high school, Katy. You only get one chance at it. Don't waste it by being miserable."

"I don't want to wake up every morning feeling like this, but I do." She doesn't know why she's telling him this. Why Lucas of all people she decides to open to. She thinks it's because he understands. Keith _was_ a father to him. Peyton lost her mother. They get it. It's not like Lily who never knew her father or Jamie who only lost a grandfather. This is a parent, someone that raised you into the person you are today. It's different.

"I know that feeling." He chuckles. "But one day you'll wake up and that feeling won't be so heavy and you'll move on. It's OK to grieve, it's OK to feel bad, but there comes a time when you just got to start living again. You know, letting people back into your life and enjoying it again. You get what I'm saying?"

"Crystal clear." She smiles. "Thanks, Lucas."

"No problem." He nods, standing from the bed. "My door's always open if you ever need to talk. Now come on, Peyton made breakfast." He smiles, resting his hand on her shoulder as they walk downstairs for the food.

She has a lot to deal with today and she has a lot to say to certain. Maybe today's not the day the feeling doesn't lessen, maybe tomorrow though.

"Brooke, will you stop this!"

"I'm just trying to help." The fashion designer wined as Kimberly pushed her away. The hospital was starting to get a bit too depressing for Kimberly, making her angry and impatient to get out here. And Brooke annoying her every two seconds wasn't helping.

"Well, Nurse Brooke, I don't need help. I'm just sitting here."

"Sorry." She mumbles crossing her arms over her chest and gives that puppy dog face.

"Don't do that face." Kimberly points to her. "Nothing good comes of that face." Brooke's ready to counter with a smart comment when the doctor comes in. "Please tell me I can leave, doc."

"You seem better than yesterday. I don't see why not." He smiles to the two women in the room. "Let me just get a wheelchair." He turns and walks out of the room, leaving the two adult alone again.

"Thank God. One more second here and you might have to admit me to the psycho ward."

Brooke chuckles at her dramatic statement. "OK, drama queen, I'm going to drop you off at your place, leaving you in Hannah's hands and then I have to get the store. But I will come by later to check on you."

"Again, not necessary." Kimberly huffs, knowing Brooke and how she won't change her mind.

She does her job quietly as she's come accustomed to. She waits tables, take people's orders, and then bring them the food, just as Lily taught her. Unfortunately, today Lily isn't her and she finds it's even harder to get through the day without her.

She can here the rumors of Kimberly spreading around. She'll hear a nearby table whispering about it or kids on the street staring in at her. She can feel the stares on her back when she turns away. She doesn't necessarily like the new attention and she does everything to ignore it. It's just kind of hard when their all around her and the stares deepen.

Rumors of the accident being worse than what it actually was. And it only reminds her of what could have happened. Her sister isn't dead, she doesn't have any brain damage, and she isn't paralyzed from the waist down. She's fine. It's her that might be a little broken.

She tries to make it through two hours of working before the gossip gets too much for her. She doesn't care if Kimberly will get pissed or if Karen needs help. She doesn't want to be there.

She tells Karen some lame excuse about how she feels bad and the older woman doesn't bother to question. She knows what the girl is going through and maybe some fresh air is just what she needs.

She walks the sidewalk slowly, staring at the cement lines as she thinks back to her and Lucas' talk. One day she's going to wake up and things won't feel as bad. Does that mean that she miss her mom anymore? That her memory of how bad she feels will fade? Because she doesn't want that to happen. She doesn't want to forget this pain because it reminds her of how much she loved her mom.

She doesn't want to wake up and have it all be gone. But it's time that she at least tries to move on. There's a possibility that her sister could have been dead. And if Kimberly would have died, she would've died with their fight in mind and knowing that she's leaving her sister.

She doesn't want hat to happen. Not now or the years to come. So, maybe she still is mad at Kimberly, but maybe there's a chance she could forgive her.

"Katy!" She turns to see the blonde haired, blued eyed boy that has helped her so much in the past twenty-four hours. Usually she would've kept walking, but today she doesn't really want to leave him behind.

"Hey." He says once he catches up. "Aren't you supposed to be at the café?"

"Yeah," She nods, "but I wasn't up for it."

"I hear ya. How's Kimberly doing?"

"I don't know." She shrugs. "I haven't seen her yet. I'm kind of scared to."

"She's better, Katy, you know that."

"Yeah, I know, but all my life I've never seen Kimberly weak, you know. She's always been strong and together and I don't think I could see her laying in that bed helpless. I could barely do it last night."

"If you want, I could go with you." He suggests with a small smile.

"I think when I'm ready, I got to face it on my own."

"OK," He nods, "but until then you wanna…I don't know, hangout?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Hannah, you don't have to do this." Kimberly says as she watches Hannah fluff the pillow behind her back.

"I'm just trying to help."

"Well, thanks." She chuckles snatching the pillow from her hand, "but I'm not helpless. I can do some things on my own."

"The doctor said to rest." Hannah says placing her hands on her hips and taking that fearless stance.

"Right and I can't do that if I'm too busy killing you."

"Very funny." She glares.

Kimberly chuckles and changes the channel on the TV. "Look if you really want to help, it's my week to pick Ally up from school. Go do that."

"OK." She nods. "I'll be back in a half hour."

"Oh, and Peyton and Haley are kind of working today so I promised I'd carpool. So can you take home too?" She asks smiling widely.

"Two hyper, full of sugar, kids. On a Friday afternoon." She says staring off into space. "You're evil you know that."

"The best ones are." She watches Hannah leave the room as she storms past Julian. He turns to see his daughter in bed and they both laugh at the girl who just left. "What are you doing here?"

"I think I have an appointment with you, remember?" He chuckles sitting down on the edge of the bed. "How you doing?"

"I'm fine. Kind of bored, but I'm good."

"Good." He nods.

"You know it shouldn't be like this." She says to him seriously. "I shouldn't be able to talk to you so casually. Not after what Brooke told me."

"Do you really believe what Brooke says?"

"She's my mom."

"Yeah, and I'm your dad." He says turning closer to her. "And I'm in love with your mom. Not some A-list actress. You know that."

"Do I? You are gone a lot, Julian. I can see why Brooke would believe something like that and, OK, maybe you don't seem like the guy to have an affair, but you never know."

"Believing and knowing are two different things. And I know that you know the truth. Right, you believe me, right?"

"Yeah." She says softly. "But Brooke doesn't and that's what's important." She says meeting his eyes. He smiles because she might be the only one that believes him.

"She will." He nods. "I'm going to make sure of that and I'm going to need you're help."

"How am I going to help?"

"Brooke wants the divorce to happen as soon as possible. I need your help to make sure that doesn't happen. I don't know how but I'm sure you can figure something out."

"And what are you going to do?" She asks kinking her brow.

He gives her that classic Julian Baker smirk. "I'm going to make her fall in love with me again."

"Aunt Hannah!" The three kids come running to her. Hannah's kneeling on the ground waiting for them. It's Ally that meets her first and gives her a big hug. Maybe she doesn't know these kids as well as she used and maybe it's been a while since she last saw them, but they seem to recognize her and they don't hesitate to jump on top of her.

"Hey guys." She says standing up on two feet. "Wow, you guys have really grown up."

The three children smile with missing teeth.

"Can we go see Kimberly before you take us home?" Sawyer asks tugging at her shirt.

"Sure, I guess we can swing by there." Hannah shrugs. She nudges them towards the car to help buckle them in. "Come on, get in." She buckles each kid into the back seat and starts to walk around to the front when she hears her name.

"Hannah?" She turns to meet those blue eyes she hasn't seen a really long time. She doesn't know if she should ignore him or give an awkward hi. She didn't even know he worked here.

"Tyler." She smiles walking over to him.

"Wow." He laughs embracing her in a hug. It doesn't feel weird, which is weird to her. Because this is her best friend's ex-boyfriend and according to girl-code she's supposed to hate him. "It's good to see you. I didn't know you were in town."

"Yeah," She nods, unwrapping her arms from around him, "I'm here helping out Kimberly for a weeks."

"Yeah, I heard about the accident." He says bowing his head and staring down at his fingers. "How she doing?"

"Good. It might be a few weeks before her leg gets better, but until then she's at home." She says hinting that maybe if he ever wanted to come by so and so would be there. What Hannah doesn't know is that he already has come by. Twice. And both times he almost broke Kimberly in two.

"That's good." He nods. "Well, look I got to get back to work, but it was good seeing you again."

"You too." She watches him walk away wondering exactly who that person was, because that was not the Tyler she remembered.

The years sure have changed them. All of them

"Hi." She says into the end of the phone. That smile comes to her face and she has no idea how this man can put it there. "I'm sorry if you're at work or at home, but…"

"Yeah I got the flowers. Their beautiful." He says something sweet that he knows will make her blush and it does. It's a superpower, she thinks, because no one can make her so girly with a few words.

"Well, I was just calling to say thanks and to see if you maybe wanted to go out some time." She says softly. There's something about him that makes her do this. And she realizes it's because she likes him. She really likes him and because of that she feels like a fifteen year old girl again.

"Really?"

"It might be a while before I can actually go on a date, but I'll call you." He says something along the lines of _ can't wait _and even that has her blushing. She can see his smile on the other end and listens to his voice carefully as if it's the last time they'll ever talk. They say their goodbyes and one promises to cal the other the next day. She lies in bed with the phone still clutched in her hand and that smile's on her lips.

It's Charlie's smile.

She falls asleep easily that night. She dreams of her mom and old times they used to share. Like all the times they went shopping or their late night phone calls. She remembers all the good times. Some her brother is in and some Katy is in. But it's mostly just the two of them laughing and having fun.

If she knew then what she knows now, there would have been a lot more of those moments.

She rolls over onto her side and something feels different. Darker. Like something's watching her. Her eyes pop open and she doesn't know how that happens when she was fast asleep just seconds ago. She looks up to see a tall figure beside her bed. It'd probably scare her to death if the moon wasn't shining in and she couldn't see the outline of her baby sister there.

She looks scared and innocent and Kimberly can remember this clearly. When Katy would sneak into her room at night and want to sleep in her bed. She's too tired to understand why she's doing it now. But she has a good idea.

"Come on." Kimberly mumbles lifting up the blankets and sliding over. Katy takes them quietly and settles into the bed all without a word. Kimberly's arm wraps around the girl and pulls her closer for the comfort of her being there.

That's how they fall asleep that night. Two sisters. Together.


	13. Everybody Learns From Disaster

"_They were not pure, but they had a potential of purity, like a soiled white shirt." _- John Steinbeck; East of Eden

**Chapter Thirteen: Everybody Learns From Disaster**

_We went rolling up the coast til there was no more coast to wander  
We tried every different road just to see which took us further  
We were living on the run, but there was no one chasing after  
We were looking out for love, and we were flirting with disaster_

^v^v^v^

You ever sit in your room while it's pitch black? And you hold your hand up in the air and try to find the outline of it. It's a lot like trying to find the little things in the world. Like the magic and the hope. All for a better life. We all look for it, even when we think we don't, we are. The magic out there - it's there. I know you know it; it's just there, even if you can't see it. Trying to find the hope in the world; it's a lot like trying to find the outline of your hand in the darkness of a room. Sometimes you don't find it…

And sometimes you do.

She wakes to the same feeling she's had for the past two weeks. That feeling where she has to remind herself that she's in Tree Hill, where her mom's gone, that her sister is slowly turning back to the person she used to be. She wakes up to the feeling where today might be a little bit better.

And she is better. Today she is at least. Hannah's still around and she's glad to have the company. And she loves how Hannah's talking about finding some place here in Tree Hill. She's been talking to Charlie a lot lately. She hasn't seen him very much, but she hears his voice almost every night. Things are better. Things are good. All she has to do is keep them that way.

Katy's beside her when she rolls over onto her side and that's a little strange for her. She knows her little sister has been sneaking into her bedroom for the past few days, but she always makes sure to leave before Kimberly even wakes up. She loves her sister's company and she understands that this is her way of opening up and getting somewhat better. She remembers how her little sister used to do this when they were younger. Back then she was scared of the dark, now it's for different reasons. Fear puts a lot of emotion in people. It makes us realize some important things. It made Katy realize how alone she can be in this world.

Kimberly rubs the sleep from her eyes and smiles. Her sister looks so peaceful. There's a hint of a smile on her face and Kimberly can't remember the last time she saw her sister like this. She almost doesn't want to wake her up, she loves this sight of her, but it's then that the door swings open and Hannah stops in her tracks. "Am I interrupting something?"

Kimberly smiles and turns back to her sister, nudging her slightly Katy stirs and lets out a moan. "Hey," Kimberly whispers. Katy turns and only squints at her sister's face, not wanting to let all the sleep in her eyes go, "You should get ready for school, kid." Kimberly smiles, calling 'kid' like she used to.

This is how things are now. They're not ready to take that leap into actually bonding again, but they're almost there, Kimberly can feel it. But they're talking about old memories they have together and Kimberly's taken up to calling her kid again. They don't talk about Grace yet, she doesn't think Katy can handle it. So they stick with simple things and each day Kimberly feels some of that hatred in Katy lessen. And she's starting to become the kid she used to be.

Katy groans and staggers to get out of bed. She walks past Hannah without a word and Kimberly knows that in ten minutes she'll have to go in there and wake her up all over again.

"I'm sorry, but am I seeing things?" Hannah asks walking into the room more.

"Nope." Kimberly smirks, shaking her head.

"OK, then why is she sleeping in your bed?"

"I don't know." She shrugs. "She's been doing that since I got back from the hospital. I guess the accident really did scare her."

"Everyone seems to be scared about that accident, but you. You seem perfectly fine."

Kimberly shrugs her shoulders and moves to get out of bed. Hannah being the person she is, moves to help her before Kimberly can stop her. "That's just what it was, Hannah, an accident. I'm fine. I'm walking fine and today I'm going back to work. There's nothing to be afraid of."

"Tell that to Katy."

"I'm just seeing all this as a sign." Kimberly smirks, standing from the bed and heading towards the bathroom.

"Sign for what?"

Kimberly stops in her tracks and turns back to Hannah. She thinks about it for a moment. "For everything." She doesn't want to tell her about Grace. She hasn't seen her mom in a while, maybe she was just coming around to give her that news and now that it's gone so is she. A part of her is sad, but then again she has her sister because of it.

Oh, how she missed this place. The brick walls with the albums lined up. The musky feeling she gets every time she enters the place. The loud music that can sometimes be heard from down the hall. Yes, this is Red Bedroom Records. And it's been two weeks too long since she's been here.

She followed Peyton's orders and stayed away until she could fully walk again and now that she can she's practically running to get back to work. She's not sure if it's her loving her job or she just wants to be out of that house. Either way she's excited to be here.

She's kind of surprised to be the only one there when she arrives. Expecting to see Peyton, she grabbed two coffees this morning. But since her boss isn't anywhere to be seen she drinks both and goes to her work. It's not long before things start to feel normal again. She goes through each thing she has to do today quickly and like she hasn't been absent for two weeks. It feels good to be back.

She's almost done with her latest project when she hears that little voice. "Kimberly!" She looks up from her papers and smiles when she sees her little sister running towards her. She drops the pen in her hand and bends down to hug the little girl and set her in her lap.

"Hey, Ally. What are you doing here?" It's then that she looks up and sees Peyton and Sawyer walk in hand in hand. "Hey, Boss."

"Morning." Peyton smiles. "It's good to have you back. How you doing?"

"Pretty great now that I got my little buddy here." She says tickling the girl in her lap. Ally laughs out loud and squirms free. Kimberly chuckles and messes up her hair before Ally runs off with Sawyer down the hall. "What are you guys doing here?" Kimberly stands from her desk asking her earlier question.

"Since we get so busy, once every few months Brooke and I will pull the girls out of school and just spend the day with them. We'll take them to the park, get ice cream, and, you know, dedicate the whole day to them."

"That's pretty awesome."

"Yeah," Peyton nods. "But Brooke had this huge meeting with Macy's today that she just couldn't get out of and the girl's were already out of school, so I'm kind of stuck with both of them." Peyton shrugs.

"Well, I don't mean to intrude or anything, but if you want I could come along. I've already pretty much zoomed through all my work here." She looks to Peyton with that smirk where she just knows she's coming along. She loves being back at work, but she'd rather spend the day with her sister.

Peyton seems to seriously consider it. She chuckles and turns away back to the opening. "What do you guys think?"

"Yeah!"

"Please momma!" The two girls beg. Kimberly has no idea how, but Peyton somehow knew they were back there. Peyton turns back to Kimberly, still acting as if she's thinking about it.

Kimberly shrugs. "I'm no Brooke Davis, but I know the woman like the back of my hand."

Peyton chuckles and rolls her eyes. "Come on."

"Careful!" Peyton yells as she watches Sawyer climb atop a pile of large walks across the way. Peyton and Kimberly walk the pathway through out the park as the two kids lead the way while wandering in and out of things.

"Chill out, Peyton." Kimberly says smiling. "She's just being a kid. Kids wander."

"I know, but the things she gets herself into. The other day I found her sleeping in the dryer." She says with a worried expression. Kimberly can only laugh.

"She's exploring. Maybe one day she'll grow up to discover some new fruit in the rainforest or something. Or she could grow up to be some weirdo." She shrugs. Peyton slaps her arm causing Kimberly to laugh. They continue walking, watching as Sawyer and Ally pick up things they find. "I remember one time I climbed up on the roof of the house and Grace came out and yelled at me for like an hour straight. I think I stayed up there all day for fear of her spitting fire at me." She says causing Peyton to laugh.

"And?"

"She came up on the roof and spit fire at me." She laughs. "Kids do weird things, but a lot of times they're smarter than adults so I never question it."

They reach the end of the walkway and Sawyer and Ally run off to the empty playground. All the kids are in school so they have it all to themselves. Peyton and Kimberly take a seat on a nearby bench and they catch up on things.

Kimberly mentions how things with Katy are better and Peyton gushes over the rumor of her and Charlie and how she's dying to know if it's true. Kimberly can only blush and Peyton goes all girly on her, something Kimberly's never seen. But they just talk mostly, about everything. They used to do this. She and Peyton would sit at Red Bedroom some days after school and Peyton would give advice and they would talk about Brooke and Tyler and Lucas and music and everything. They just haven't in a while. It feels good to be doing it now.

They never got too deep into their conversations. Not deep where their confessing feelings they haven't ever talked about before. But this time's different.

"You ever think about having anymore kids?"

Peyton looks over at her like she's crazy. She chuckles, shaking her head and turning away from her. "Do you not know what happened last time I was pregnant?"

"Yeah, but who cares." Peyton looks at her, kinking her brow. "I don't mean like, who cares that you almost died. I mean, who cares if you have placenta previa or whatever it's called. You survived it once. Who says you can't do it again?"

Peyton sighs. "I'm not saying I don't want more kids. It's just I don't want to risk my life again in order to have them."

"I understand that. I just never imagined you and Luke ever having just one, you know?"

"I didn't either."

"What about adopting?"

"We've thought about it." She nods. "But with Sawyer being so young we don't want to bring a baby into everything." She shrugs turning away to watch Sawyer slide down the slide. Kimberly doesn't turn away. She just watches Peyton. This woman is so strong and she's never openly admitting something like wanting more children.

Sawyer calls for her mom to come play and Peyton chuckles before getting up and walking over to the playground. "Hey," Kimberly stops her. "You're Lucas and Peyton. You've proven that you can survive anything."

She doesn't say anything. She walks away and meets her daughter. They stand at eye level as Sawyer tells her something that has Peyton laughing. Ally walks over to them and the two girls drag the woman over to the swing set. Kimberly just watches it all. Witnessing it.

"So which one's yours?" A voice asks out of nowhere. Kimberly turns in her seats to see a brunette standing behind her as she watches Peyton and the two kids play. She looks down at Kimberly and smiles this soft smile before taking a seat on the bench next to Kimberly.

"Umm…the brown haired one in the purple dress. She's my little sister." She says awkwardly. This lady might seem nice, but it's still weird.

"She's cute." The lady nods. "I've seen her around her sometimes with her mom." She says earning an expression from Kimberly. "Oh, no. I'm not some creepy child molester or something. I'm actually a photographer." She says showing the camera as it hangs from her shoulder. "And I come here sometimes to take some pictures. This park is beautiful at sunset.."

"Gotcha." Kimberly nods. "So, just to be clear, you're not some creeper looking to kidnap my sister."

"No." The lady chuckles, shaking her head.

"OK, good. I'm Kimberly."

"Sarah." She says shaking hands with her. "You know, you look familiar. Do, do I know you?"

Kimberly shakes her head. "Sorry, but I can't place your face."

"I've never seen you around town. You new here?"

"Just moved back." She nods, realizing that pang in her stomach when she gives that news to people isn't there. That feeling of home is there though, for the first time in the last seven years. She feels at home.

"Really? Mind if I ask why? I've never really understood why people always come back to Tree Hill."

"Personal reasons." She shrugs. "I've come to realize that Tree Hill sucks people in. You can never really leave." She chuckles.

"Yeah, I know what you mean." She nods. "Well, maybe we went to school together or something, but I have to get going. Sorry for coming off as a weirdo."

"No problem. Maybe I'll see you around."

"You too." She stands from the bench and takes off down the pathway back into the city. Kimberly, now forgetting all about Ally and Sawyer, watches the strange woman. She doesn't know where or how this woman thinks she knows her, but Kimberly has to admit that she does look a little familiar. That face and that smile.

And those eyes are all too familiar to her.

She comes home to a quiet house. Katy's not home and she's a little disappointed. She's been wanting to talk to her sister and she doesn't know why she chooses now of all times.

She decides to wait for her. A nice glass of wine and the setting sun while trying to crack open that new book she's been wanting to read doesn't sound too bad. She grabs herself a glass and the book and takes the stairs for the balcony. She doesn't expect to see Katy there.

There are butterflies that form in her stomach, but she's still happy to see her.

"Hey."

Katy turns in her seat and it's then that she sees Katy had the same idea she had. There she is in that comfy chair with a can of soda and a book in her lap. Kimberly holds up the things in her hands and they can't help but chuckle.

"Whatcha reading?" Kimberly asks taking a seat in the chair beside her.

"East of Eden." She says showing the plain book cover to her. "Long as hell too." She chuckles.

"Yeah, I remember I had to read that back in school too. I think I got to the third chapter and just gave up and rented the movie."

"There's a movie?" Katy sat up excitedly, ready to throw the book into the ocean.

"Don't even think about it." Kimberly shakes her head. "I got caught so bad. I was in the middle of the movie, Haley walks in, sees what I'm watching, steals the DVD, walks out, and I think she threw the book at me on her way." Kimberly chuckles remembering where the book had hit her in the forehead. She swore there was a bump there for a week from the thick hardback.

"Yeah, but Haley's not my teacher." Katy shrugs.

"The movie's three hours long and worst than that book."

"Seriously?" Katy drops her shoulders. Kimberly nods and Katy can't help but let out a groan of frustration.

"Read the book, kid. It'll be good for you." Katy sighs and opens the book to at least try to make it past the page she left off on. Kimberly just watches her. She could read her own book and sip her wine, but she doesn't want to. She really doesn't want to read the book Brooke gave her over a year ago and now she doesn't really feel in the wine mood. She kind of just wants to spend time with her sister.

"What are you looking at?" Katy asks when she notices Kimberly's staring. The book is closed again and she's pretty sure it's not going to be open for another few days. "It's really starting to creep me out."

"Sorry." She shakes her head. "It's just…I haven't really looked at you in a while." She says. Katy gives her a strange look and the words of what she just said sets in. "That sounded really creepy, didn't it?"

"Yeah."

"You've just changed that's all."

"You mean I've grown up?"

"No." she shakes her head. "I mean, like…since the accident. Things are different I guess."

"I guess so." Katy shrugs.

"Katy, I just…I just wanted to let you know that when you're ready, if you want, I'm here, to talk. About mom or anything. I want you to know that, OK?" Katy nods. "And this whole thing…me and you…it can be like before. You know, before I became a bitch and went off to live in the big city." She chuckles as does Katy.

"I'll try harder, Kimberly." She says quietly. "It's just hard sometimes without her."

"I understand that." Kimberly nods. "She was your mom and you were closer to her than I'll ever be. But you just got to remember that she loves you. I know that." She says the last part like a fact and it kind of is. "So, we're OK?"

"Yeah."

"OK." Kimberly smiles. "What you thinking for dinner? Pizza?"

"That sounds perfect." The girl smiles acting as if she's starving.

"Alright. Well, I'll go order it and pick it up. While I'm gone you read that book." She says before getting up and leaving.

"Hey, Kimberly." Katy stops her. She turns around to meet her sister's eyes and she looks nervous. "I don't…want to go live with Hannah. I wanna stay here." She doesn't really know what to say. She can only nod and smile and leave her sister be. Words didn't need to be spoken for that. It was just a perfect moment. She's glad they had this talk. She knows now that things are OK. Things are only going to get better. She knows that they're both going to wake up tomorrow and not feel as bad.

The pizza smells good and she's excited to get home so she can have a nice dinner with her sister. It's probably long overdue; she feels that tonight is the night where everything gets mended.

She walks out of the pizza shop and opens her car door. Placing the box in the passenger seat she turns her keys in the ignition. She's ready to drive out into the street when she see him.

Tyler. As he's walking out of a random store. He's smiling and carrying a small bag. She's ready to roll down her window and say hi, but then she sees the woman that walks out behind him and takes the bag from him. She's the reason why his smile is so big. It's the woman from the park.

Sarah. His arm wraps around her shoulder as they walk down the sidewalk together. Kimberly watches as he places a soft kiss on the top of her head and she just can't believe what she's seeing. Before they're able to see her, Kimberly pulls out into the traffic and makes her way home.

It really shouldn't bother her that he isn't single. But she can't help but spend the rest of the night thinking about it.


	14. Square Peg Round Hole

"_The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn."_ – David Russell

**Chapter Fourteen: Square Peg Round Hole**

_You said that it was still stolen  
But it just didn't beat anymore  
I guess when it's done falling  
It's just lying dead on the floor_

^v^v^v^

"Hey."

She doesn't expect to see him. She just wanted to pick up Ally and go, and not want any confrontation with him at all. But he's here. Of course he's here. He works here. And he looks damn good in his blue dress shirt and black slacks and his haired nicely combed to the side. He looks really good.

But there's a girl.

There's always a girl.

A nice, beautiful brunette who has a wonderful smile and isn't covered head to toe in issues. Of course that's the girl he's with. It seems he likes it a lot to be with one of them types of girls instead of her.

"Hey." She says putting on this fake smile he knows isn't real. She leans down to Ally's eye level. "Why don't you go wait in the car for me?" Ally looks to Tyler and then back to her. Even her little sister knows there's something there. Kimberly stands back and watches the little girl run to the car before turning back Tyler.

"How are you?" He asks shifting from foot to foot.

"Good. I'm back at work. Things are good."

"Good." He nods, looking away from her to watch all the little kids running around the playground and all the parents coming to greet their children. It makes his heartache sometimes and he doesn't know why he has this job. Kimberly watches him and sees that same pain in his eyes that were there a long time ago.

"So," she breaks the silence, mostly for him. He shouldn't be thinking too long about one thing. "I saw you and your girlfriend the other day." It kind of hurts to talk about, but she doesn't really want to stand here awkwardly anymore.

"What?"

"Yeah, you were coming out of the ice cream shop. I actually met her the other day too at the park. She seems really nice."

"Oh, no. No, no, no." He says frantically. "No. That's not my girlfriend."

"But…"

"Kimberly, that's…" He stops, trying to geather his thoughts and overcomes the lump in his throat. "that's Sarah. My sister." It's so clear now. They look alike and they have that same smile and it just makes since. "She came back a few years ago."

"Wow, I, I didn't know."

"Yeah, she came back looking for my mom and dad, but they had already left for Florida and I was there. She just didn't want to be alone anymore and so she moved in. Been here ever since."

"I knew I had seen her from somewhere. I didn't realize it was from the pictures you showed me. She seems really great, Tyler."

"She is." He smiles nodding his head. "She's the Sarah I remember." He doesn't know why he's telling Kimberly of all people this. She knows, though, about all of this. She knows how much it means to him to have the old Sarah back. She knows how much he loves his big sister and how much he missed her. He shouldn't tell her, but she seems to want to know and he can't stop telling her things.

"I'm glad you're happy, Tyler." She says saying it for other reasons than his sister being back. "I got to go. I'll see you around." She turns to leave without having him say anything else. She thinks it might be better that way. Before he says something to pull her back and have her heart twisting into unimaginable shapes. He always seems to be doing that to her.

* * *

He walks into the clothing store late that afternoon. The flowers behind his back are making his hand sweaty. Or that could be from the nervousness inside of him. But he sees her. All work and no play. Not even a smile is twitched on her lips. She's sketching. He knows that concentrated look anywhere. And he knows not to bother her, but he loves her too much not to.

She doesn't seem to hear the bell above the door ring and so she keeps working. _God, she's so beautiful._ She peeks up from her papers when she feels his presence near and just seeing him makes her annoyed. He smirks and averts his eyes away from her for a second.

"Hey, Millie, think I could have a second with my wife?"

"Uh, sure." The assistant says awkwardly, placing the dress back on the rack and walking to the back of the room. Julian watches her leave and then he stares back at Brooke.

"What are you doing here, Julian?" Brooke asks picking up her pen again and continuing her sketches.

"I came to give you these." He shows her the flowers in his hand. They're daisies. Her favorite and he knows that. And she wants to smile and melt in his arms and say thank you, but she remembers why he's doing this. Not to be cute or romantic, but to say he's sorry or to not have her be so mad at him. Well, it's not going to work.

"They're beautiful, but no thanks."

He sighs, placing the flowers on the counter between them. "Brooke…you got to know I'm not going anywhere. This divorce is not going to work. I love you too much to let it and I know that you still love me. So, you keep pretending that this whole thing is going to work, but you'll see."

He smirks and turns to leave, leaving the flowers on the counter. He doesn't turn back, but he knows that she's still staring as he walks away.

* * *

She feels like there's this weight lifted from her shoulders.

She hates how Tyler still has that kind of power over her. It's been seven years and she still can't stop thinking about him. She's grown up and matured more, but then she hears the name Tyler or she sees him walking down the street and she can't help but love him all over again. And she can't figure out if that's a good thing or not.

She wishes he had a girlfriend. She wants him to be in this great relationship, because maybe then she could move on. Maybe she could see how happy he is and maybe finally after seven years she could be happy too. But that's just his sister he's walking around town laughing with and not his girlfriend. It doesn't make her feel any better. She just wants to be free. Free of him and his smile and his goofy hair. He shouldn't mean anything to her now. She shouldn't think about him constantly.

But she does.

And though she's happy that Sarah's back and that he's single, she still wishes he wasn't. Because then maybe she wouldn't want him as much. And she keeps asking herself, does she want him back? Now that she knows that he's single maybe she does. But she's not sure she's willing to take that chance again. She's confusing herself. Does she want him or not? She loves him, but then she doesn't. She wants him to be with someone else, but then she wants him all to herself. And she wishes she would just pick a side.

"Hello, Kimberly, are you there?" Hannah stands in front of her waving her hands in front of her face trying to grab Kimberly's attention. She doesn't know how long she's been standing there and she's not sure how long she's been thinking about Tyler.

Kimberly looks from staring into nothing to Hannah and she puts on that same fake smile she wore with Tyler this morning. She's starting to make it look convincing. "Hi."

"Hi." Hannah chuckles sitting down in the chair across from Kimberly's desk. "You OK?"

"Yeah. Fine."

"Right." Hannah nods, knowing better than to believe that, but she won't question it. "So, I have good news." She leans forward letting her arms fall down in front of her. Kimberly looks up from her stacks of papers, giving her full attention. "I found a house!" She squeals. "Or an apartment, but the details don't really matter."

"Wow. That's awesome." Kimberly smiles. "So, you're really staying after all."

"Of course. Besides, I think you and Katy still need me around here."

"Well, you know you're always welcomed." She says standing from her desk and walking around to lean against the front of it. "How long until you can move in? And what about a job? Did you even think this through?"

"Yes as a matter of fact I did. I just have to pack up all my things and I can be moved in at the end of the week." She says with a cocky smirk.

"And a job?"

"Already have one. I start Monday." She was never really sure why her friend became a nurse. It was an odd choice for Hannah and Kimberly thought she was joking when she heard about it. But her friend said she wanted to help people and that she did. Plus, she likes the flexibility and she works all hours of the day and she likes how there's always a new adventure. Kimberly never imagined her as a nurse, but it's just something Hannah wanted to be.

"OK, I was wrong. It looks like you have it all worked out." Kimberly says walking back around her desk and taking a seat. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have work to do."

"Yeah sure, I got things to do anyway." She says standing from her seat and grabbing her things. "I kind of wanted to ask you something though. And you can totally say no if you don't like it."

"Yeah?"

"Well, you remember how you had to stay in bed for those two weeks and I had to take the kids to school every day?"

"Yeah…"

"Well, every day I'd have to see Tyler and we'd talk and he seems really great and…"

"And you want to ask him out…" Kimberly says, her mouth practically hanging wide open.

"You can say no."

"No." She shakes her head quickly. "Me and Tyler we're…we're not like that anymore. If you like him…you should…you should ask him out." She says, her throat getting dry.

"Kimberly, I don't want it to be weird."

"It's not. I just never expected you to say that. I'm fine with it. Really."

"You sure? I don't want to violate girl code or whatever."

"I don't really keep up with girl code, Hannah." Kimberly says. "Ask him out. It's cool. You guys would make a great couple."

"Alright, but only if you're cool with it."

"I'm cool." She says staring back down at her papers, trying not to care about the whole thing. She seems to be getting good at that lately too. With Grace and Tyler and Katy, she has to be the strong one – the one that has everything together – she doesn't know if she wants to be that person anymore. Because right now all she wants to do is fall apart.

Maybe she should start sticking to girl code and just say no. Her best friend wants to date her ex-boyfriend, even Kimberly can point out the problem in that. But she doesn't want to say anything. What if Tyler is Hannah's one? It's a ridiculous question to ask and completely absurd, but it could possibly be true. One day, Hannah and Tyler could be getting married. The thing is…Kimberly can't even picture that scenario.

"Alright, well, I'll call you later." Hannah gives a small wave before walking out of the office and leaving Kimberly to her work. Truthfully, though, she doesn't get much work done after Hannah left anyway.

So this is where she has to pick a side. The side where she wants Tyler or the side where she doesn't. Hannah wants him and a part of her still does too, but does she be a good friend or does she be selfish with something that could possibly still be love?

She feels as if this moment will shape the rest of her life. Like it's the biggest decision she'll ever have to make.

Maybe it is too.

She's about to make her decision (well, maybe not) when the phone rings and she can't pray for a better distraction. She's a procrastinator and she'll wait as long as she has to to make this decision. But if Hannah's as determined as the look in her eye is, then Kimberly thinks she won't have to make the decision.

"Red Bedroom Records. This is Kimberly." She says professionally into the phone.

"Hi. It's, uh, me, Charlie." He seems happy, which makes Kimberly happy, for some odd reason.

"Hi. How are you?" They have a date tonight, which she totally forgot about until she heard his voice. She's spent the day whole thinking about Tyler that now she feels like a complete bitch.

"I'm not so good." He sighs. "My mom got sick and she can't watch Will tonight, so I'm actually calling to cancel our date."

"Oh."

"I'm really sorry."

"No, it's fine." She says quickly, trying not to sound so disappointed. "I probably should've expected this to happen." She says barely loud enough for him to hear.

"What?"

"Nothing. Look, if you want…I could come over there and we could hangout."

"Are, are you sure? I mean, we can reschedule." The thing is she doesn't want to reschedule, not with Charlie. Her day has sucked so much so far and maybe she needs Charlie to help distract her from it all.

"No, really its fine, I'd loved to."

"OK." He says just a bit happier. "I'll see you at eight?"

"I'll be there."

* * *

It's been a while since she's been to this apartment. Since she got shitfaced drunk and passed out at TRIC. At least it didn't turn out to be the worst experience she's ever had. She did meet Charlie after all.

Will opens the door when she knocks and by the mischievous look on his face he's probably not supposed to be doing that. But he invites her in very politely and tells her that his dad will be out soon. He sits back down on the couch in his spider man pajamas as he plays with his toy trucks.

"I remember you." He says looking up from his toys and at her. "You slept in daddy's room that one time." The little boy doesn't really understand how that sounds or why she blushes so deeply.

"I remember you too." She says kneeling down to his level. "You woke me up when I had a killer hangover."

"What's a hangover?"

"Something you'll find out about when you're older." She chuckles. "What's your name by the way?" She asks even though she's heard more about this little boy than he realizes.

"William."

"Well, William, I'm Kimberly." She says extending out her hand for him to shake. He looks at it and smiles, taking her hand and feeling like a grownup. "How old are you, Will?"

"Eight!" He says proudly.

"Eight? Why, you're almost a man." William chuckles. "And a handsome one at that. You must get all your good looks from your father."

"You got that right." Charlie says walking into the room. Kimberly turns to see him in his blue dress shirt and jeans and he looks good. He looks really good. "But it's this young man's bedtime."

Charlie picks up Will and the little boy makes sure to grab his trucks on the way up. Kimberly stands up too and she's smiling a real one and he seems to know it too. "Hi."

"Hi." He says hoisting the little boy in his arms. "Let me put him to bed and I'll be back out."

"Take your time. Goodnight, Will."

"Night."

Charlie leaves the room and Kimberly takes the time to browse a little. She sees photos on the wall and books on the shelves and it all looks like a normal apartment. It says a lot about Charlie. For instance, he loves that little boy he's tucking in right now and Kimberly just knows that. She can tell by the way he handles Will and the way he talks to him and all the pictures on the wall of the little boy. She can tell that he's smart by the books he's read on the shelves and that he's a great cook by the way his kitchen is out together. She can read people. It's her thing.

She's here in this apartment and she doesn't feel an ounce of nervousness. Not with Charlie. And she doesn't know how to take that. She likes that she can be herself around him and maybe that's why coming here tonight wasn't such a big deal for her.

She walks out onto the balcony and leans against the railing to look out onto the darkness of Tree Hill. She's never seen stars like this in Chicago. These are bright and shining and if she knew anything about astronomy she could probably point out a planet in this clear sky. And she likes doing this – staring up at the stars. It reminds her of times with Ashley. How they used to play connect the dots and have conversations that might have been too big for them to handle. But she loves it all the same. Back then and right now.

"Sorry about that." Charlie says walking out onto the balcony with two glasses of wine in hand. "That kid would stay up all night if I'd let him."

"It's OK. My little sister is the same way."

He smiles and watches her as she takes a sip of her wine and looks back out to the city. "So, I got to admit, I'm not the best with first dates. I usually end up saying something…stupid." He says with Kimberly laughing.

"Yeah. It's been a while since I was last on a date too."

"Now I don't believe that. Someone as pretty as you probably gets asked out every day." Tyler doesn't make her blush. Charlie does. A lot. And she likes how he does that. "I'm sorry. That's where I say something stupid."

"No, it was…um…very nice of you to say that." She chuckles. "So, how did you become a bouncer?" She asks for the sake of a subject change.

"Oh, well, I just needed a job and this one just seemed perfect. Will stays at my mom's when I work at night. It's a pretty good deal, you know, I get to tuck him every night and I'm there when he wakes up. Take him to school, come home and sleep a few hours, go pick him up from daycare, and I spend the rest of the day with him."

"That's pretty awesome. You seem like an amazing father." She says placing her hand on his bicep. Maybe she shouldn't have done that, but she doesn't regret it.

"I try my best." He nods. "I could've finished college, but I had to put my son first."

"Yeah." She says softly.

"So, you're Peyton's assistant upstairs. How'd you get that job? Peyton doesn't hire just anyone."

"I worked at a record company in Chicago for three years." She shrugs. "Plus, I've known Peyton and that whole group since I was fifteen." She says. He looks at her curiously, knowing that that group of friends is pretty close knit. "Brooke. She's my mom. Adoptive mom."

"Oh. That makes a lot more since now." He says remembering the first night he met her and she started talking all this drunken gibberish. "Why'd you move back?"

"My mom, my real mom, died." She says delicately. "And I got custody of my moody fifteen year old sister."

"That's…unreal. I'm sorry."

"Thanks, but I wasn't as close to my real mom as I am with Brooke." She shrugs, trying to make it seem like a big deal. But he knows better and she knows better. She feels this wall being built between them and she hates how after all these years she still does that. Her past isn't something she likes to talk about, especially to people she doesn't know very well.

He can feel that wall and tension between them and he can see her stiffen as she sips from her glass. And even then she's beautiful.

"It's hard, isn't it? Your past?"

"Difficult is more the word." She says keeping her eyes to the city in front of her. His hand falls on hers and he squeezes it for comfort. He has no idea what she's hiding, but he feels as if he needs to know. Finally she looks over at him, showing him these tears that are harboring.

"Maybe one day you could tell me about it." He says softly, not wanting to scare her, because he's promising that there's going to be another date and plenty more in the future. He's promising that he's going to tear down that wall and that she'll trust him completely to tell him.

"Maybe." She nods.

"I really do like you, Kimberly." He whispers, inching closer and closer to her. She doesn't say anything back. They just meet in the middle. And before they know it, he's kissing her and she's kissing him. Her arms are round his neck and those tears are forgotten while his hands hug her hips and pull them closer to him.

She didn't get a chance to say it, but she really likes him too.

And she thinks she might have picked a side to be on.


	15. The First Day of My Life

_"You wake up one morning and God has forgiven you and you walk around squinting all day because you've forgotten how sunlight feels warm and rough against your skin like a kiss on the cheek from your dad, and the whole world is brighter and clearer than ever before." _- John Green

**Chapter Fifteen: The First Day of My Life**

_I hear every word being said  
And I remember that everyday  
I get a little bit closer to you_

She seems happier and lighter than she was a month ago.

A month ago, she was dealing with a sister that didn't want to be here. She was talking to a mother from the dead and trying to figure out her parent's divorce. She was trying to get over Tyler and falling for Charlie. A month ago seems like forever compared to what she feels now.

Now her sister is open and becoming the Katy she used to be. She hasn't seen her mother in a while. Brooke and Julian are still no longer Brulian. And Charlie…he's great and loving and funny and sweet and sensitive and all these things that she's falling for.

They've gone on dates and they've become closer. She loves William like he's a little brother and she's starting to spend more time at his place than she is her own. They keep their relationship a secret from everyone else. She doesn't want Brooke harassing her about it or anyone else giving her that look like she knows they will.

So, she's dating. So what? Charlie's a great guy and she doesn't want to expose him to her world just yet. And she's not sure of what to think of that. With Tyler, he was shoved into her life and her circle so quickly that he didn't have enough time to look back. And none of that turned out well. So, this time, maybe, she'll ease Charlie into her life. Make him comfortable with the people that she calls a family. Maybe then things will be better.

But for now, she spends most of her time with him when she's not with Katy or at work. She forgot how much time having a boyfriend could take up. But there are others reasons why her time is spent with Charlie.

Hannah.

Her and Tyler have been getting too close and Kimberly wouldn't feel so horrible (jealous?) about it if it wasn't her best friend and her ex-boyfriend. Kimberly doesn't want to hear about the few dinners they've been on or the time he helped move into her apartment or when he forgot his lunch and she brought him one. She doesn't want to hear it. And she especially doesn't want to see it. But Hannah loves Katy and Katy's always at the house and Kimberly needs to go home to sleep.

She should say something about it. She should tell Hannah how much her relationship with Tyler makes her feel awkward. But she can't. Because for these past few months they've all been miserable and if Tyler is the one thing that makes Hannah happy then Kimberly can't stop them.

"Kimberly!"

She looks up from her things and into the blue eyes of a very angry Lucas Scott. She's seen him angry before, but this is different. She's never seen him angry at her and he looks really mad. He walks across the large room and up to her desk putting his hands on her hips and taking that defensive stance both him and Peyton do.

"What did you do?" He asks. Kimberly stands up from her desk and walks around to meet him.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You talked to Peyton about having more kids." He sneers at her pointing his finger at her. She's not sure why it's such a big deal or why Lucas is yelling at her. It was over a month ago and she was trying to make conversation with Peyton. Then something clicks and she thinks of how long time as actually passed since then and she's…

"Is Peyton…?"

"Pregnant? Yeah. And you're to blame for that."

"How am I to blame?" She asks still not sure why they're having this conversation. "It wasn't like I was in the bed with you guys!"

"You planted the idea in her head and convinced her to do such a crazy thing!"

"Peyton is an adult. She can make her own decisions." Lucas shakes his head and runs his fingers over his face and through his hair. He glares at Kimberly and he can't think of anyway any of this is OK.

"You better hope she's going to be OK." He walks out of the room and leaves Kimberly to think about the next Scott baby that's going to come into this world. She's worried for Peyton, but if she knows anything about Lucas and Peyton it's that they can get through anything.

* * *

The first thing she sees when she walks into the restaurant is those blue eyes. And she can't help but smile when she sees him because he's smiling back at her. Maybe it's too early to call him her boyfriend or to actually kiss each other or any of that stuff, but she wants to and she feels like he wants to too.

It's only been a month and all they've done is gone out for lunch and maybe a few dinners, but there's potential to be more. They haven't exactly talked about their feelings towards the other. But maybe today can be that day.

"Hey." He says standing from his chair and holding hers out for her. She sits down and he helps scoot her chair up closer to the table before he takes his seat again. They order drinks and chat about their lives since the last time they've seen each other.

They tell jokes and laugh and eat and they really get along. They've always gotten along and been pretty great friends. It was usually the three of them when they were teenagers and now they've split up and gone go to college and got jobs and they've grown up. And because they've grown up they've grown apart and they've forgotten things like their friendship and things that could be more.

_Hannah went to Tree Hill for spring break. It wasn't something she planned, but Kimberly really wanted her to come and she hadn't seen her friend in a while. Brooke invited her to stay in Kimberly's room while the two girls caught up for the week. It's been a while since she's seen her friend and it's been kind of hard to get a hold of her since she came back to Tree Hill a few months back._

_It's her first time here in the small town and she's a little nervous. The way Kimberly talks about this place, she makes it seem unreal and like a fairy tale. The people that are in her life seem so important to her and Hannah knows that she's happy here._

"_And, Hannah, this is Tyler, my boyfriend." Kimberly introduces as the three of them sit on the bleachers at the Rivercourt. _

"_Hi." Tyler smirks, holding out his hand. "Nice to meet you."_

"_You too."_

_They sit at the Rivercourt for a few minutes killing time until Kimberly and Hannah have to be home and they all talk like they've been friends since grade school and they laugh like their jokes are the funniest things they've ever heard of._

_Kimberly's phone rings after a while and they all know its Brooke calling wondering where they're at. She steps down off the bleachers and over to the small walkway along the river._

"_You guys make a cute couple." Hannah comments watching as Tyler spins his ball on the tip of his finger._

"_Thanks. Kimberly's pretty…great." He says not able to find a better word to describe her. Hannah looks at him and she knows that he loves this girl across the way and the way he smiles when he looks at her is indescribable. He loves her. Hannah knows that._

"So, I talked to Kimberly today." Hannah says keeping her eyes to her food. She knows it's a soft subject and they don't normally bring up her best friend or his ex-girlfriend. But she's been thinking a lot and she wonders if maybe he still feels something for Kimberly.

"Yeah?" He says barely looking up from his food.

"Yeah. Her and Ally are doing really good. Peyton's talking about giving her more work at the studio and she seems…better than what she did a few weeks ago." She shrugs.

He looks up and meets her eyes. "That's great." He nods before eating some more of his food. "It's good she's happy. She deserves it." He says with a little more meaning behind that than Hannah can pinpoint. She doesn't know why Kimberly deserves it or why he said something like that.

"Are you OK? You seem a little weird today." She asks.

"No, I'm fine. It's just been a long day. Why? Are you OK?"

"I'm fine." She shakes her head. "I've just been thinking."

"About?" He smirks.

"Me. And you. Us. If it doesn't sound weird to say that." He looks up from his food, setting his fork down and planting his elbows on the table. His brow crinkles and his fingers sweat and he feels like his heart is churning like butter. He watches as she sighs and fiddles with the tablecloth and he doesn't know what to say to her. About that. And his feeling towards her and his feeling towards Kimberly. If there still are feelings for Kimberly. Is there?

"Yeah…?" He draws out, working on anyway to delay this conversation. He needs more time to think about this and them and this little love triangle thing they're all going through.

Its Hannah now that sighs and sets down her things and rests her elbows on the table. "Why did you become a teacher?"

He can't tell if she's asking to avert their previous subject or if she's truly curious, but he feels like he wants to tell her. Like anything he tells her but the truth she'll know that it isn't the truth. But he also knows that he can't tell her. He also knows that there's a small part of him that doesn't want to tell her. Because that part of him still belongs to someone else.

"It's just that the last time we talked you wanted to open up a sporting goods store and the time before that you wanted to have an auto shop. And now you're a teacher."

"It's just something I fell into." He says it simply enough to help her believe that it's not a lie. He can tell she wants to ask more. More reasons why he lives the way does or has done the things he's done. He knows she wants to know and so does everyone else in this town, but he doesn't feel as if he owes it to them or Hannah to tell what he feels and what he knows. So he says the things he knows won't make her ask anymore than he's ready to answer.

He doesn't ask about her life. The career she's in or the apartment she lives in. He doesn't ask about the things she's done in her life or why she's done such things. Because it's all in the past and Tyler doesn't like bringing up the past.

For a while now he hasn't bothered with the things he's done. He doesn't really care to. It hurt and it almost killed him to go through what he has, but dwelling on it won't solve anything. So he's living in the present, as corny as that sounds, and he's decided to embrace everything.

"I really like you, Hannah."

"I like you too, Tyler."

And they've said it and now there's no going back. Now they'll start dating and maybe they'll fall in love and who knows, maybe their soul mates. And maybe one day they'll get married and have kids and live happily ever after. Maybe. Maybe Kimberly will move out of town and things will go back to normal. Maybe he wouldn't have to see Brooke everyday or feel guilty about things he couldn't stop from happening. Maybe all of this could happen now because he finally said what he's wanted to say.

But if there's one thing Tyler hates to think more than the past, it's the future.

* * *

"Hey!"

Katy turns her head at the yelling voice seeing Lily running towards her. She hikes up her backpack up on her shoulder for what feels like the millionth time that day as she keeps up her pace so that she doens't miss third period spanish. Lily catches up to her a few moments later and they both stop so she can catch her breath.

"Apparently I did not get the athletic trait in the family." She huffs as she stands up and the two make their way into the building.

"Apparently." Katy chuckles. "So, what's got you running across campus to talk to me about?"

"I was wondering if you wanted to come over tonight. For, you know, a sleepover or something."

"I'm not really the sleepover type of girl."

"It's just you and me and we won't be doing all that girly crap that I know you hate. We'll just watch movies and eat pizza and maybe just prank call a few people." She shrugs with that michivious smirk she can get at times.

"Just you and me?" Lily nods. "Then yeah. I'll come."

* * *

So, Peyton's pregnant.

And it's apparently Kimberly's fault.

She's not sure how to take both news. Peyton's pregnant. Good thing. It might be like the last time. Very bad thing. But she's hoping (praying) that it won't be anything like the last time. But, like Lucas thinks, what if it is? She's never realized it before, but now when the thought that Peyton could leave us crosses her mind, she realizes how big of an impact Peyton has had in her life.

She's like a second (or third?) mom to Kimberly. Peyton's another constant thing in her life. And if Peyton goes it will be too empty for her to handle. Grace's death was hard enough to get through. Another one and she's not sure she can take it.

She's thankful for the tall, lanky kid that comes into the studio. He's her new distraction for the time today and her mouth curves up when she sees the flowers he's holding. He asks for Kimberly Baker and she signs her name beside the dotted line beofre he's out of the room. The smell of tulips fill the air and her eyes close so she can feel a bit closer to it all. Everything smells a bit different now. Her eyes open and she spots the card buried beneath all the yellow flowers. She can already recognize his hand-writting and she feels her whole body relax when she reads his words.

_Thought it'd be fun to send some. Have a good day and I'll see you tonight. - Charlie_

She wants to call him right then and say all these great things to him and make him laugh and invision his smile. And it seems lately that that's all she wants to do. She wants to talk to him and hear his voice and wants him to hold her and kiss her and all these things she hasn't wanted in a really long time. And it feels really good to start letting someone in again - to have them know more than most people isn't scary to her anymore - with Charlie it's comforting. He doens't know everything yet, and she's not ready to let him into that part of her life just yet, but she feels like she can. She feels like that maybe she can fall in love with Charlie.

Charlie invited her over tonight. Will's with his grandma and it's one of the rare moments they'll get to spend together with no children around. She's a bit nervous and she's not sure if something will happen tonight. If something does she's not sure how she'll react. Maybe a little different than with Tyler.

She's ready to pick up the phone and dial the number she's come to memorize when Hannah comes barging in. It reminds of a time when she would be working here as a teenager and Brooke would do the same thing. But the happy smile she sees on Hannah's face makes her question whether or not she has a smile reserved just for Tyler. Kimberly hides the card under a stack of papers for a reason she doesn't understnad and looks down to the other papers in front of her. Hannah struts in with her purse around her shoulder and her pinstripe skirt with matching blazer and hair in a messy ponytail.

"You're happy." Kimberly observes, not looking up from her papers and writing down some notes for Mia's next show.

"I have news."

"Obviously."

Hannah sets her purse down beisde the two leather chairs and walks around to Kimberly's side of the desk, leaning agaisnt the hard oak, not caring if it's invading personal space. "Who are the flowers from?"

Kimberly looks up at the yellow flowers and she wants to smile because it makes her think of Charlie, but she knows that if she does that then Hannah will start to question. "Um...they're from someone that knew Grace. I guess they worked together or something."

"Yeah? What'd the card say? Maybe I know then." Maybe it wasn't such a good lie to tell. Hannah knew Grace longer than Kimberly ever did and Grace was the one who helped shaped the person Hannah came to be. Hannah probably knows almost everyone that's ever come into Grace's life.

"I, I can't remember. I threw it away."

"Oh." She nods. "It's pretty amamzing that we're still getting flowers about Grace. How long has it been now?"

"I don't know." Kimberly says almost slamming down her pen and looking up to Hannah. "You said you had news."

"Oh right." She perked up. "I had lunch with Tyler today and we talked out our relationship and we decided to take things a bit more seriously. So, now we're officially dating and officially boyfriend and girlfriend." She says happily waitng for any sort of reaction from Kimberly. But she's doesn't know what to do. Does she hug her or say that she's happy for her? Does she fake a smile and go on? "Aren't you happy?" Hannah asks when Kimberly doens't say anyhting. She wants to scream _'No, I'm not excited! You're dating my ex-boyfirend and you expect me to be happy about this! What's wrong with you?' _But she won't let herslef do that, because Hannah thinks she's OK with this and she can't turn back now.

"Yeah, yeah I am."

"Are you OK, Kimberly?"

"I'm just really busy planning Mia's next tour and everything here and with Katy and Brooke and with everything."

"Oh. I guess I'm kind of bothering you then, huh?"

"Not to be rude, but just a little." She says flashing a smirk to make sure Hannah doens't get too offended.

"I'll let you get back to work. Call me later?"

"Yeah." She nods. "See ya."

Hannah leaves and she feels a huge weight lifted off her. She doesn't want to talk about Tyler or Grace or Charlie with anyone. She just wants to go home and get ready for tonight.

* * *

"So, Jamie tells me you guys have been hanging out a lot lately." Lily smirks as she sits across from Katy on the bed. Katy looks at her like she's crazy but Lily's giving her that knowing look that she's seen her mother wear and Lucas wear and she tries to laugh it off.

"You're crazy." Katy says finally, but Lily isn't letting up on the look. "We're just working on our biology project together!" Lily kinks her borw. "Stop looking at me like that!" Katy yells and Lily can't stop laughing and then Katy starts laughing, but there's still that look that Lily gives and that question she's asking without really asking it. _'Do you have feelings for my nephew?'_

"Seriously, Lily whatever it's not...you're wrong."

"Seriously, Katy," She smirks, "I'm just saying, Jamie's hot."

"You do know that you guys are related, right?"

"Yeah, but I didn't say I was hot for him. I'm saying that you are."

"Again, you're crazy."

Lily chuckles. "Look you believe what you like, but I know the truth. Now I'm going downstairs to find something to eat. You want anything?"

Katy shakes her head and before she knows it Lily leaves the room and Katy's left to her own thoughts. She doens't know why Lily is persistant on knowing the personal lives of Katy and Jamie - if there is any. But it's starting to make her think a little about it all. Do they really come off as a couple or even just two people that may have feelings for each other? They're just frineds, but people are starting to think differently. Even Lily thinks there's something there.

Jamie's fun to be around. He's smart and he teaches her new things like basketball and the biology homework she just doens't understand. He makes jokes and pokes fun at almost everything anybody does, but he's sweet enough to care about anyone that needs help. Katy can't do that. She can't be a teacher or help people or laugh just yet. She doens't consider herself that good of a person and she doens't feel like she can do any of that wihtout forgetting about Grace.

And right now she feels like that that can't be an option.

"Knock, knock." Katy looks up and sees that soft smile that Karen's seems to always be wearing. "I brought you guys some hot cocoa. It's kind of cold outside and the heat is kinda acting weird." She walks more into the room and hands over a cup and setting the other on Lily's bedside table.

"Thanks. Lily went to go raid the fridge."

"I sort of figured." Karen chuckles. "I swear, her and Lucas could eat for days if they had the endless supply of food. I don't know how they stay so fit." Katy smiles, almost chuckling, beofre taking a sip from her mug. Karen's hand lands on Katy's knee in an act of just being nice and it's a strange notion that really no one else would do out of the ordinary, but it's Karen and it doesn't feel so different. Everyone talks about how Karen is like a mother to everyone in this close-knit group of friends and she's never really understood it until now. In that one little thing that she did - that one action she did by placing her hand on her knee - Katy realized that this woman is like the mother to each and everyone of these people.

With Brooke, Karen let her live here for a short while during high school. With Haley, she gave time and attention that Haley didn't get from her too big family. With Nathan, Karen stepped in to give advice on his falling marriage and helped him through hard times when his own mother couldn't. Karen seemed to be like another motherly figure to Kimberly and an actual mother to Lily and Lucas. She understands why this woman is called a saint. And to think of all the things life has put her through and all the things it's given her, it's almost inspiring to just sit back and watch her be a mother.

She doesn't seem to notice the intense stare Karen is giving her, nor does she hear the racket Lily is making in the kitchen. She's too wrapped up on whatever's on her mind to notice anything. It's not until the hand on her knee isn't there anymore and all that's left is the emptiness of that feeling. The weight is gone, but she can feel where it was and she's not sure if she likes it or not.

"Was got you thinking so hard?" Karen asks picking up Lily's mug and stealing a sip.

"I was just...thinking."

"About your mom I believe." Karen says with that knowing smirk. Katy gives a small smile and softly nods her head. "It's been a few months since she died. How you dealing with that?"

"Better." She smiles. "How hard was it when Keith died?" She asks looking up through her hair that's fallen in front of her face. She sees the almost hurt and shocked look on her face and now she feels horrible for asking. "I'm sorry. I feel so stupid for asking. It's just that Lily and Lucas talk to me about losing him and I've never heard you talk about him."

"It's OK." Karen assures placing that comforting hand back on Katy's knee. "Keith did some amazing things in his life. He raised Lucas to be a wonderful man and he gave me a beautiful daughter and he waited...until I was ready to love him back. And losing him was the hardest thing I ever had to work through."

Katy nodded feeling as if this is the only thing she can ever understand in life. The moving on from death and experencing death and feeling as if you'll never feel or be normal ever again. She's trying to move on and she's trying not to cry everyday, but sometimes it's just too hard to resist.

"People think that I'm better and that I'm OK, but I'm not and I still miss her and I'm still angry that she left."

"That's OK."

"Is it?"

"Yeah." Karen nods, that hand still in it's same place. "Somedays I feel the same way. But one day you just look up and everything's a little clearer than it was beofre and your heart doens't feel as heavy anymore. That day will come for you."

She wants to say something then. Something about Keith or her mom or Kimberly or anything that matters right now in this moment they have together. But her mind has stopped any form of thinking and she's not sure there is anything else to say about the subject matter. And maybe they've said all they've needed to say and maybe Karen's helped to clear a few things up a bit.

Lily pops in the doorway with food stuffed under arms and hands filled with cans of soda with the confused look on her face when she sees her mother and Katy actually in the same room and having a conversation. "Uh...hi, mom."

"Hi." Karen says standing from the bed and removing her hand from Katy's knee and, again, she feels that emptiness again. "Is there still food in the fridge?" She says stealing Lily's cocoa and walking out the door. She makes sure to peck Lily on the cheek before walking down the room to her own room.

"What was that about?" Lily asks setting all the food down on the bed and making room for herself.

"Nothing." She doesn't really want to tell Lily what she and her mom talked about. It's one of those things that you keep clsoe to heart and never tell anyone.

* * *

She knocks on this door that's become familiar and she feels her stomach tie up into knots as she clutches her purse tighter to her chest and shifts from heel to heel. No one hurries to answer the door and she wonders if he'll keep her waiting or if he's really not home. Again, her hand connects to the wooden door and her stomach still churns as the seconds pass by.

"Hello there pretty lady." A deep voice comes from behind her. She questions at first who it is, but then she thinks for a moment and she figures only him would say something so corny. "What do you say you come over to my place and we get it on?" He sings out in that Marvin Gaye style that everyone's done at least once in their lives. She laughs before turning around to see his green eyes and blonde hair and tight black shirt that he always wears when he works.

"Only if we can finish before my boyfriend shows up." She says wrapping her arms around his neck and leaning in to kiss him.

"I don't know. A girl as pretty as you I might need to take my time with." He smirks sneakly and rests his hands on her hips. They don't really care if they're in the middle of the hallway and people are trying to pass by and giving disgusted looks.

"This conversation is getting kind of awkward now. Should we stop?"

"Kiss me one more time?"

"Deal." So, she kises him which turns into full on making out which turns into almost eating each others face. His hands move from her waist to her hair and his fingers sliding smoothly through it. His hand lands softly on her cheek. She steps even closer to him somehow and she's still pulling him closer with a fistful of his shirt in her hand and fingers through his hair. They need air but that's not stopping them one bit. He can smell her perfume and her shampoo and that part of her house that he still hasn't been to yet and he still smells like all the reminents of TRIC on him like the booze and the lonely drunks that go to bars at five in the afternoon.

"I was planning on making dinner." Charlie says once they finally break apart. She looks down and sees the plastic bag of food she didn't see him carrying scattered across the carpeted floor. "You hungry?"

"Not for food." She shakes her head givng a michivious smirk as her hands snake around his neck again. "I think we best go inside."

He pulls the key out of his pocket and unlocks the door and opening it for her. "Lead the way." She weaves her fingers into his and drags him inside. He watches her as her hips sway and his hand throws the door shut and he thinks he's never met such a perfect girl.


End file.
